heal// 5SOS

21

cw. vomit
Calum

"Sorry,"

"You don't need to apologise, you are going through some really tough things right now and I understand why you feel like you might have to go back,"

"I should've told you how I was feeling,"

"I'm always here to listen," I said, parking in our drive, "Hopefully soon you will feel a little bit better,"

"The past couple of days have just been extra hard and I haven't felt like it for such a long time. I'm freaking out,"

"Recognising that you feel that way has allowed you to reach out, and now you can use everything you have learnt to try and lift your mood. Admitting that you were worried you need more help was really, really brave,"

"I love you,"

"I love you too, and I am so proud of you. No matter how you feel, I will support you,"

"I knew they could help me,"

I nodded and climbed out the car to go round and give them a hug. They held me tightly, and for a long time.

"Sage! I built a lego set,"

"No way," they said, hugging Rider as he came over, "Show me it,"

He pulled them off into the house and I followed, finding Luke inside on the sofa with Gia watching a film. Mike and Crystal had gone, but Luke was in no rush, and simply opened his other arm for me to sit beside him.

I did, and reached across to Gia to squeeze her hand, but then she climbed over Luke and sat between us.

"Is grandma mad at me?"

"No,"

"Okay,"

"I'm proud of you for trying,"

I kissed her head and tried to figure out the film because she was instantly asking questions and telling me her opinion.

It was nice to sit with her and just do nothing.

She ended up falling asleep in my arms, so Luke said goodbye to the other kids and quietly slipped out.

As I carried Gia upstairs, she woke up and wrapped her arms round my neck, scrunching her face up.

"Brush your teeth and you can go to bed," I said, kissing her forehead.

"No,"

"Yes,"

"I want the day off,"

"I'm sure you'll feel better in the morning," I said, taking her to the bathroom, "I'll get my toothbrush and we can do it at the same time,"

She sat on the edge of the bath and I got my toothbrush from the bathroom, then both of us brushed our teeth. Rider also came in and slipped infront of me to get his, then looked at me and jumped up and down.

"This was the happiest day of my entire life. Thank you, Calum. Dad, sorry, Sage says Calum I got confused. You're my dad,"

"You're welcome bud,"

"I'm sorry. I meant dad,"

"It's okay, I'm glad you had fun,"

"I wish it didn't have to end,"

"Well you can look forward to everyone else's birthday, and your next one then. We will still have fun,"

He nodded and I rinsed my toothbrush, then took it back to my bathroom and changed into my pyjamas.