Contingency~TW/TO~ Lahey

Chapter 31: Her Do-over

I follow behind Chris and Isaac in silence into the entrance of the Argent's apartment. Well, I suppose it is Chris's apartment now. Isaac and I had caught a ride with him from the police station since Stiles had driven us earlier today. Chris talked to us all about getting our stories straightened out before involving the police in Allison's death. Which I understood, however, it was not as simple for the rest of the pack as it was for myself. I've always been surrounded by death, but this time it is different. I cared for Allison. It's always been difficult for me to make friends, especially with humans, but with Allison...it was easy. And now I don't have her anymore. No longer will my best friend be on the other side of my wall to call me over for training or to simply talk about our day or life. Another person that has become important to me has left this earth and my chest aches to have her back.

Darkness engulfs us as we enter the apartment, Isaac moving to the side to allow me to step through the threshold before gently closing the door behind us. A sob comes out of him as he faces the wooden surface, failing to compose himself. I place a hand on his back, attempting to soothe him in some way. He turns to me, looking down at me as I give him a small, pitiful smile. He then glances over to Chris who stands behind me, his back turned to us.

"I appreciate the concern," Chris speaks up after throwing his keys into a glass bowl. "But you don't have to stay. I'll be alright. I've dealt with this before."

I don't know what to say to him. What I could do to make anything easier for him. He lost his daughter. The only family he had left. First his sister, then his wife, Gerard, and now his only child. He has nothing anymore. And for him to seem so okay and put together tells me he is as damaged as I am.

He turns to us finally, aiming for the door to open it from behind us, still avoiding our eyes. "I have the capacity and...ability to compartmentalize my emotions."

Isaac faces him, a sob releasing from him again as he responds, "I don't."

Tears well in my eyes from his response. My heart aches to know how hurt he is to have lost a friend that means as much to him as she does to me. He has lost so many friends. He did not have any before Derek came into his life. But after, half of the friends and family he made were taken from him. And most of them, I was there to witness. I had the ability to save some of them, but I couldn't. And I hate myself for letting them die. But with Allison...I could have saved her. If it wasn't for Stiles's possessed other half, I could have saved her. But he prevented me from doing so. I let him distract me from the ones that needed me most.

Chris grabs Isaac and pulls him into a tight hug, comforting him from both their losses. I look up to Chris, his eyes on me as Isaac cries onto his shoulder. It's been a while since Isaac lost his father to the Kanima. He hadn't felt such a parental figure in his life until Allison and him became friends. Chris warmed up to him, despite him being a werewolf, and welcomed him into his home. Chris made headway on understanding werewolves in a better sense than his own father had taught him, which is what I like about Chris so much. He understood that werewolves are still human unless they don't want to be. Vampires on the other hand...I may have convinced him that we are unable to withdraw ourselves from the monster that plagues our minds.

I hold myself together, sending Chris a nod before looking back to Allison's bedroom door. Not wanting to intrude on their moment, I decide to move in the direction of the room that was once hers. The room I have spent so many days in. Whether it was us scheming on some new supernatural creature that appeared in this town or to hang out after a training session. There were still so many things left to teach her. So many things left unsaid. And now it's all over.

Before I step foot into the unlit room, I take a deep breath, preparing myself for what's to come. I twist the cold knob of the door, entering the bedroom, and a chill runs its way down my spine at the feeling of being inside her personal space without her here. I leave the door ajar, not wanting to be closed off from the rest of the world just yet. I don't want to feel entirely alone.