Contingency~TW/TO~ Lahey

Chapter 7: Currents

A ding from my phone brings me back to consciousness and an empty bed. I haven't had more than three hours of sleep from the look of the time and all because of an empty bed. It's not that I couldn't sleep without Isaac, because I can, it's that I can't close my eyes without seeing Isaac's lifeless eyes and Niklaus towering over him. Ever since that night, I have had reoccurring nightmares of that same event whenever I slept alone. Isaac didn't stay over last night because he had been at Scott's to help him watch over his mother in case she is the third sacrifice as a healer.

While Isaac was displaying his comic book collection to me, Scott called to ask him about taking shifts to watch over Melissa, and Isaac quickly agreed. I'm glad he has someone other than me in his life. The two are becoming close friends and, without knowing it, Isaac has been wiggling his way into Scott's pack. And I'm not going to stand in his way of that. He deserves an Alpha like Scott.

Isaac doesn't live with me, but he will occasionally stay over from night to night. I haven't brought up the subject of him moving in, not that I would mind, but I don't want to ask him something that he could easily change his mind to later. I need to talk to him before bringing that particular subject up.

I've noticed him becoming a bit more impatient for not opening up with him and I know he just wants to know more about me, but I can't find the words to explain everything. No moment has felt like the right time to bombard him with my past, even though I want to tell him everything. It's just difficult to do so. Once I do, there is no going back. He has stripped down all his walls for me, yet I can barely dent my own for him.

Sitting up against the dark wooden headboard, I grab my phone and find Isaac that had sent me a message. 'Boyd and I are skipping school today to help Derek with the Alpha pack. Want to join?'

He should already realize my answer is no. I would be of no use in protecting Derek's ass from the Alpha pack because I would be helping them kill Derek. Derek doesn't deserve my help, nor Isaac's for that matter. After that stunt he pulled that night, Isaac shouldn't want to help him either. Even if he was close to deaths touch the other night.

I click the call button next to his name, not wanting to discuss this through text.

"No, I don't want to join," I tell him once he answers. He drawls out a sigh and I detected a shuffling sound along with a slam of a door. He's already at the loft with Derek. "What has he done to deserve your help, Isaac? Are you positive he is worth risking your life for?"

"I'm not risking my life," he defends politely. "Boyd has a plan to avoid any contact if possible by electrocuting them."

At least he thought this through. I'm not keen on him going against Alpha's, but if they have a plan, he should be okay... I can't control everything he does, and I only want the best for him and for him to stay safe, which contradicts everything. I have never been in this type of situation before and I don't want to act like a parent with him. Nor do I want to be over-controlling.

"Renee," he murmurs. "I'm going to be fine." Even though I have yet to talk to him about most things, especially about my hallucination, I know he has pieced some things together about me. My past isn't something I want to bring upon him, and looking back at everything I have done...I'm ashamed for most of it. I don't want Isaac to know those things about me. To know how much of a monster I truly am. I want to be better for him, and I want better for him.

"Yeah," I reply shortly. "Yeah, I know. Just pay attention to your surroundings and call me if anything goes astray, okay?"

"Of course," he tells me before saying our goodbyes.

Continuing to sit in bed, I begin debating on whether I should suppress all the emotions I have towards Derek and show up for Isaac, or trust that everything will be okay and stay here to wait on him.