My Life

Chapter Four

"keep calm and party" naalala ni stephanie na bilin ng kaibigan nyang si jovilyn.

prom night ngayon sa school nil at isa sya sa napaka bihirang sophomore na naimbitahan ng mga seniors at juniors na makadalo ng prom. to her utter surprise, Chi San invited her. and ask her permission to court her. kulang ang sabihing nagulat sya sa confession nito. hindi iilang mag aaral ng eskwelahan nila ang nagkakagusto dito, pero siya, siya ang pinili nitong ligawan. hindi nya nasagot ng diretso ang tanong nito. because until now, her heart belongs to someone else. who's heart is cold as ice.

"are you all right??" 

muntik na syang mapapitlag na madama ang mainit na hininga ni chi san sa tainga niya.

"im sorry.. nagulat ba kita, i just thought di mo ko gaano madidinig-" hinging paumanhin ni chi san nang mapuna ang reaksyon niya.

"i understand. im sorry if i offended you by my actions" putol nya sa sinasabi nito, kanina pa sya wala sa sarili mula ng dumating sila sa party at masilayan nya ang gwapong mukha ni miguel na mas tumingkad pa sa suot nitong amerikana.

"may be i'll just get you something to drink??" alok sakanya nito.

she turned to look at him. his chinky eyes is so fun to look at. tila palaging naka ngiti ang mga iyon, hindi katulad ng mga mata ni miguel na kung hindi pa tatawa ay palaging seryoso. why cant she just like chi san??

she smiled at him "sure." 

"be right back" he said with a smile and he squeezed her hand.

hindi pa lumilipas ang sampung segundo nang makaalis si chi san ng may umokupa sa inuupuan nito.

"hey" anang tnig, nang lingunin nya itoay naitsurahan nya isang magandang babae, junior ito sa pagkakaalam niya, she just cant seem to remember her name.

"im alicia" pakilala nito nang tila mabasa ang iniisip niya.

napatango tango na lang siya.

"soo youre here with chi san oppa??" nananantiyang tanong nito.

"a-huh." maikling sagot niya, hindi malaman kung saan tutungo ang kombersasyong iyon.

hindi nya napansin na dumilim ang mukha nito dahil na din sa nag iilawang disco lights.

"is it anything serious??" tanong pa nito.

"i dont think its any of your damn business alicia."

nagulat si stephanie sa galit na tinig ni chi san na hindi nya namalayang bumalik na pala. her usual gentle voice was gone.

"i am not messing with you chi san, i am just asking some questions around here." galit din na sagot ni alicia dito.

"you are asking about me and that is messing with my personal life, then youre messing with me" mapanganib na ang tono ng boses ni chi san, naalarma sya nang tila kahit na anong oras ay sasabog ito.

"whatever" balewalang sabi ni alicia dito at balewalang umalis

she heard chi san release a heavy breath.

"im sorry" malumanay na sabi nito.

nagkibit balikat lang sya, umupo na ito sa tabi niya

"alicia.. who is she to you??" she asked

he looked mortified by her question

"shes nothing" sagot nito mayamaya

"nothing?? hindi halata." sarkastikong sabi niya.

"miguel.. who is he to you??" ganting tanong nya dito.

it her turn to looked mortified.

"now are you going to tell me, 'he's nothing' ??" tila nauubusan ng pasensyang sabi nito.

hindi sya makapag salita.

"at least wala akong nararamdamang kahit ano kay alicia, how about you??" may halong galit na ang tinig nito.

hindi pa rin sya makapag salita, how did he know this things. napatungo siya.

nadinig nya ang buntung hininga nito.

"look, im sorry, alcia, well.. she's my fiancee" anito, napatunhay sya, she looked directly at his face, nanlaki ang mga mata niya sa sinabi nito. fiancee/? high school pa lang ito!

tila naramdaman nito ang iniisip niya.

"dont looked so shock, hindi lang mga  chinese ang mahilig sa ganitong engagements, pati rin kaming mga koreans, my parents want me to marry alicia since the day i was born" he explained. medyo magaan na ang tono nito.

"so are you wooing me to annoy your parents??" she asked.

he looked wounded but a little bit guilty.

"i adore you stephanie." he plainly said

"but you dont like me??" pang uusisa pa din nya dito

she felt a little bit disappointed when he didnt answer.

mahabang katahimikan ang namagitan sakanila, tanging ang malakas na ingay sa bulwagang iyon ang pumupuno sa katahimikan nila. wala na bang lalaki ang magkaka gusto sakanya, her ego is enormously wounded right now.

"im sorry.." sabi ni chi san maya maya, matapos ang mahabang katahimikan

she forced herself to smile at him.

"dont sweat it chi san, no worries." masiglang sabi niya dito.

tila naka hinga ito nang maluwag nang makita ang ngiti sa mukha niya.

"thank heavens you understand!" anito.

"and chi san, just so you know, i am willing to be used." simpleng sabi nya dito.

nawala ang ngiti sa mga labi nito

 _______________________________

"I won't give up on us

Even if the skies get rough

I'm giving you all my love

I'm still looking up"

"thank you.." bulong ni chi san sakanya.

imbis na sumagot ay hinigpitan lang nya ang yakap dito.

"just shut up and hold me." may halong inis na sabi nya dito.

she felt his laugh vibrated through his chest. 

" 'Cause even the stars they burn

Some even fall to the earth

We've got a lot to learn

God knows we're worth it

No, i won't give up"

ninamnam ni stephanie ang liriko ng kantang inaawit na bandang inarkila ng eskwelahan nila. she comitted herself unto something she knows she doesnt even sure of.  all she knew was that, she needs this, she badly needs something to distract her from her broken heart.

soo it is not just chi san who would benefit from this set up.

when the song ends, chi san directed her to their table, nakita nya si jovilyn na abala rin sa sarili nitong date ng gabing yon. then she also saw miguel. 

muli, nakaramdam sya ng pamilyar na kirot sa dibdib.

she just maybe needs to give up. seriously.