𝗔𝗿𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗲

No one understands you

"what happened?" Tom asked with a little of laugher. the laugher thanks to my exaggerate reaction after reading how my favorite characters of my current favorite book finally expressed their mutual love and, of course, kissed

i looked up at him, i bet my eyes are shining upon the happiness of my lecture. and my focus went on

"come" his facial expression changed from a joyful one to a confused one, "come here" i repeated and stand from the wooden chair i was sitting on

he did, as well, and arrived next to me in matter of seconds. "it's just that it's a secret" i whispered like if what I'm going to tell him was really a secret. "you can tell no one" he nodded, "promise it" he shocked his head but promised it

i got closer to him. my conscience stopped me for a second, thinking if I'm really going to do it. but the devil on my left shoulder won the debate with the angel on the right one

"so you know this book I'm reading?" i questioned, his head slightly nodded, "well... the main characters finally confessed their love" my eyes staring right into his dark deep brown eyes, waiting for an action of its owner

he is not gonna do it. the little red man on my shoulder whispered. it is a bad idea, you know you cant- the white one start speaking but got interrupted by the devil saying that i need to go for it. i preferred to listen to the left side

i start moving forward, closer to him, my eyes wondering from his brown eyes to his pink lips. tom frozen, like if he saw a ghost. our bodies are finally slightly touching, his eyes staring down at my petite figure

"she said..." yes Y/n, you feel it, just say it, "i love you" our eyes locked, my heart running as fast as a thunder and the nervousness eating me completely, making me scared of what I'm going to say, "enough to fight for you... to sacrifice my self of necessary" there is no way back now, and i was no planning on taking it. "enough to miss you incredibly much when we are apart, no matter what length of time it is for and regardless of the long distance" there is no key that can unlocked our pupils

"enough to believe in our relationship... to stand it through the worst of times... to have faith in our strength and to never give up on us" maybe none of us has blinked, and I'm glad it is like that, otherwise this would be over as every other time

"enough to spend the rest of my life with you... be there for you when you need, or want me, and never EVER want to leave you... or to live without you" i feel there is more to say but also this is enough, "i love you this much" my heart took off an overweight, one it's been meaning to get rid off for a long time

i was afraid he wouldn't understand my words, that he wouldn't took the message, but he did, he knows those words where said for him and only him

my eyes decided to look at his salmon lips, putting the first card on the table. then they returned to the chocolate eyes, and stayed there, until his decided to played and put the next card of the game. my head start leaning closer, slowly, I'm not going to stop inches away from his lips. my eyes got slowly closed as my lips are finally going to meet their dance partner

but its our malison

"Y/n" my older brother voice booked for the answer of mine. the knight was quick to step away from me, his eyes leaving with him. leaving me standing by my own with the desire of his touch on me

but this has happened enough for myself to know how to get out of those feelings fast and to act as a woman that is not in love, to act like nothing was about to happen and nothing happened. but tom is the expert on that department, not me

"oh, here you are" Leopold figure finally showed up in front of me. "what where you doing?" his eyes traveled to the boy next to me for a second before returning to me

"dancing" i said sarcastically, "reading, what else do you do in a library" confessed your feelings and be interrupted just when when you are gonna kiss that one person

"wanna go for a ride?" he suggested, "its been a long since we don't do it"

"the king found time for his favorite sister" i joked faking surprise, he rolled his eyes and then i let out the laugh and we headed to the stables. on the road my sight slightly turning to the shinning armor behind us

— ♡ —

at the next time we had alone, tom and i, i tried to talk with him. because what i said is true, I'm gonna fight for us, i want to spent the rest of my days with him. i want him to love me and i want to love him. because i already do, i love him

but its Tom, what else did i expected. he ignored me, he don't want to talk anymore. he is only another knight on the royal guard

we met with one glance and another one made him quit. now i talk to him and he like nothing, he doesn't want to talk, he no longer wants to talk

and i don't know what to do, what saint do i have to make up for? if it was yesterday that i made him fall in love. what does it takes to get him back?

before yes, now no, no one understands him. i cant get his love but he wants me to try. he is damaging my head. why does he likes to vanish? he always ends it but it never starts, and it repeats over and over again

i think I'm freezing, in his door I'm knocking. my house is cold since he left, i still keep the kisses he never wanted. and the wrinkles on the bed keep thinking about him, i want to convince them it's not for that much.

is that what he did has no cure. similar to a joke, but it is a torture. little by little I'm loosing my sanity. the temperature rises and falls. he makes it land before it begins to fly. no one understands him