A stupid crush: Nico di Angelo x reader

Chapter 15

It's been a month since the accident.
It all happened so fast, you had no idea where the time went. You still talked to the girls and guys, but it felt like you and Nico were separating ever so slowly.
You and Connor haven't spoken to either of them since that fatal night in the park.
You missed Nico.
His messy black raven-like hair, the way he smiles and laughs, Gods you miss everything about him.
But, alas, you have tey to hear from him. {A/n: I almost wrote 'Jim' lmao.}

You see him in the school halls. But there's always tension that settles down between you two whenever you lay eyes on each other.
You sit staring at each other every single time, in the middle of all the bussing kids on their way to class.
At first, you sit there motionless and emotioness. You don't think about anything as you stare at him, he looks almost dead inside.
But then. . .he starts to look sad. You can see it in his eyes, the sadness is so strong and contagious, you start to tear up, almost as if he were radiating it towards you. You turn away before you leave, sneaking one last glance at him before you do, he sighs and leaves.

This happens almost everday. It's complete and utter torture.

To see the person you were once in love with only weeks before and now looking like a total stranger.
To feel torn of love between one another.
You love Connor, you love Nico.
You can't think straight, it's hard to pay attention.
Being around Connor makes it worse.
You just want to shut of your heart, run away!

But you can't. . .

Your grades drop because instead of doing homework after school, you think of solutions to get out of the Hell hole you dug yourself into.
You get only a few ours of sleep before you wake up in cold sweat from nightmares.

Nightmares about Nico and Connor.

You tell Connor you've been eating but you have not.

How long has it been?

You and Connor were laying in your bed one night and Connor fell asleep much earlier before you. You couldn't sleep at all.
It's around 2:30 in the morning.
You stare into the dark abyss in front of you.
You think you're starting to hallucinate from all of the not eating and sleeping because you start to hear voices.

You screwed everything up!
If you had just finished lunch with Nico and Will, non of this would have happened!
You wouldn't have gotten hurt physically and emotionally.
Look how useless you are, broken arm, broken arm, broken body. . .
Useless.
Nico probably stopped loving you and Connor probably too!

That's not true, a part of you countered it.

How could you know (Y/N)? How would you EVER know?!

You sat up and leaned over to kiss Connor on the cheek. "It's okay if you've never loved me Connor, I understand, nonetheless, I love you."

You then pulled on some shoes and walked out of the bedroom, than out of the house entirely.
As you walked on the street one word echoed in your head.
Useless.