The Orc With A Heart

Chapter 4: Own Decisions

I looked back at the park that was behind me right now, that I had spent the most of today hanging out with my friends at, if you did not count how much time I sat laying in bed being lazy for the beginning of the day, which I still felt quite a bit bad for the fact that I had made my friends wait quite a bit of some time, but it was all over with at this point, and I felt like there was no reason for me to dwell on it for any longer, as I shook off all of those thoughts, and I then looked away from the park.
There was a lot of other things that I could dwell on, that hurt me a lot more, but I really did not want to think on it for any longer, as I felt like I just wanted to get over it at this point, and just move on with my life. I had got to the point where I knew that it was a bad idea to ever go after a human woman, due to the fact that I was an orc for one thing, and I had in fact been told what orcs did to women.
I felt a bit sick, as I wanted to blame my self, but at the same time too, I felt like I could not, as I knew that it was not my fault at all, as to what it was that my species did. I had to be strong right at this moment, as I knew that I had to not make any stupid decisions right now, such as the fact that deciding to join all of my friends in the army, felt like might be a very bad decision for me to make, if I was not going to lie to my self either.
I had to think on it some more, and I had to tell my father the news, and try to get some advice from him, as I knew that he would help me the most. I was just glad that I did not get all too angry on the fact that she had said no to me, and had decided that she was going to be a lot more happy with a man that I hated nearly to death. I had been tempted to kill him several times, as sick as it made me even feel to even think that sort of way.
It made me feel just like the rest of the orcs were, as it kind of made me angry as to the fact that I would even think that I could be like the rest of the orcs, as I just wanted to lay down and cry right now. I really was not tired at all right now how ever, though I still just wanted to go back home. Perhaps I could try to train my self with a bow in my father's back yard, just in the case that I did in fact decide that I wanted to go in to the army.
I sighed, as I got my focus off of all of that, as I then saw that the road that I had walked down to get to the park not all too long ago from now, was a lot more busy than it had been earlier in the day, as it was clear to me that a lot of people had just got off of work for the day. I sighed, as I stood on the side walk for quite a bit of some time, until I got an opening to head over to my house that was not all too far away from me right now.
I still felt like I wanted to cry, but I shook off all of those thoughts all at once, as I then noticed that just as they always did when ever they were to get any where near me, all of the humans moved away from me when they got near me on the side walk, as I saw that  a bunch of them were walking in the grass, to try to stay as far away from me as possible, as if they thought that I was stupid, just like the rest of the orcs were too, and I did not have a clue as to what it was that they were doing.
I sighed, as I felt like I just wanted to get out of here right now, and head back in to my home, but sadly that was not going to be the case at all for me right now, due to the fact that the road was far too busy right now, and there was going to be no way that I could get around it any time soon. I felt like I wanted to punch some thing right now, but I just balled up my fist, as I dipped my head a bit low to the ground, doing my best to shake off all of those thoughts right now.
It was quite a bit cold right now, not out side, but just the way that I was feeling, as I just kind of wanted to give up on all of this, and I just wanted to go back over to that lake, such as I had thought about doing earlier, and just drown my self in it, as I was sure that there would be a lot of happy people in the city, if that were in fact the case in the very first place any ways, as it meant that they would not have to deal with the big ol orc that walked around the road all of the time.
I sighed, as I knew that those were not the best thoughts to be on at all right now how ever, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts all of the sudden, as I then suddenly heard a voice start to speak to me from not all too far away. I was a bit lost by it at first as well, as I was fairly certain that I was going crazy, as I knew that not all too many people wanted to talk to the big nasty orc that was in town.
That was not the case this time how ever, as I heard my name 'Zin' said quite a bit louder this time, as I turned my head around, a bit lost as to where it was that it had come from in the very first place any ways, and why on this world would any one want to talk to me any ways. I blinked my eyes just a few times, as I turned my head over to the lady that was saying my name, as I then realized that it was the old lady that owned the diner that I had walked by earlier.
I was a little bit shocked by it, but I knew that the old lady seemed to like me a fair bit, as she did not judge me due to the fact that I was an orc at all, as I then nodded to the old lady, for her to know that I was listening to her, as I expected a bit of a big smile to come up on her face, such as there usually was when she did in fact speak to me, as it did seem like she actually did like to talk to me, unlike a lot of other people.
It made me feel a little bit better, though I saw that she did not have a smile on her face this time, much to my surprise never the less, as I was a little bit lost by it, as I then tilted my head at her, to let her know that I was a little bit lost by just what it was that was going on right now in the very first place any ways, as I stared her down for a few moments, as I then began to listen as to what it was that she had to say to me in the very first place any ways as well.
"Zin! Are you alright son? You look like you need to talk to some one, here, how about you come in to the diner, and we have a little bit of a chat..." She said, as it seemed like she was ignoring the fact that there were people at her nearby table that were staring at her, as it was clear that they did not have a clue as to what it was that she was talking about, nor did they seem to know who it was that she was even talking to at the exact same time too.
I blinked my eyes just a few times how ever, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts all at once, as I knew that my father had told me time and time again, that it was best to not think all too much on what it was that other people thought of me, as I knew that he was right, as I knew that no matter what I did, I was always going to be judged for the fact that I was an orc in a human city.
I shook my head, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh all of the sudden, as I then shook off all of those thoughts all at once as well, as I knew that I should not be bothered by it at all, just as my father had said for me not to be, as I then nodded to the lady once again, that went by the name of Paris, which was a bit of a strange and rare name, such as the name that my father had given me when I was just a little baby as well.
I knew that the lady knew what it was like for people to treat her differently, as I knew that a lot of people did not like her, simply due to the fact that she was an older lady, and she owned a diner, which made a bit more than what a lot of people made, as I knew that a lot of people were jealous of her, as some times her place would be trashed, and also the fact that a lot of people just did not want to go to her diner what so ever.
But the people that knew her, knew that she was a good owner, and she knew how to take care of the place, so it did not matter all too much to her, and she still made a fair living off of the place, as she had a lot of people that worked there as well, and she treated them a fair bit good too, as well as the fact that she paid them a reasonable amount too. The food was a bit pricey, but it was worth it, as the food was delicious, I could say with out a doubt, as I usually ate there once a week, as I was a regular there.
I smiled just a bit to my self, as I was glad that the old lady wanted to talk to me, as I was not going to lie, she felt like she was the perfect person to talk to right now, as I knew that she would not judge me for the fact that I was angry as to what it was that had happened to me not all too long ago in the day, as I then began to head over to her, as my foot steps, I could tell scared the people that were at the nearby table to her a fair bit, as they turned their heads over to see what was going on.
They then realized just who it was, as they then dipped their heads a bit low to the ground, and they kept on eating their food. They were regulars at the place, but it did not mean that they still were going to like me, as they just did their best to ignore me when ever I was there, which I was perfectly fine with as well, as it was not really like I was trying to make friends with those people at all, as I too did my best to ignore them, as I then walked right in front of Paris.
Paris looked at me dead in to my eyes, as I then saw her begin to wipe her hands all of the sudden at the exact same time too, as I could tell that they were quite a bit greasy, due to the fact that she had been serving food, as she tended to like to do that often times, even if she did not have to, and she did in fact already have waitresses at the diner any ways. She usually gave the tip on the house as well, as she did not like to be greedy with her money.
She was a good woman, I could say that with out a doubt, as I then stopped my self once I was right in front of her, as I then shook off all of those thoughts at the exact same time as well, and I then nodded to her, as this time it was my turn to speak to her, it felt like. She looked at me for just a few seconds, but she did in fact listen as to what it was that I had to say to her in the very first place any ways how ever.
"What is it you need me for? I want to get back home..." I asked her, as I was a little bit lost as to what it was that she had stopped me in the middle of the street for, as it was a bit rare for her to do, even if she did in fact like me a bit more than other people. I was quite a bit annoyed by it this time, even if I did like her a fair bit back, as I just wanted to get back home, and talk to my father about the fact that I wanted to go and join the army.
I sighed, as I felt like I could not turn down the nice lady how ever, as there was no reason at all for me to be an ass hole to her, as she was clearly, simply just worried for me. She looked at me for just a few seconds, as she tilted her head at me, before she then began to laugh, which confused me quite a bit, none the less, as I really did not have a clue as to just what it was that was going on with her right now.
I shivered a little bit, as I was not going to lie, she had a bit of a strange laugh, as it sounded almost like a witches laugh, but that was normal for her, and I did not want to call witch on her either, as I knew that people would in fact take it seriously, and she could get killed for it. I still felt a little bit sick by it never the less, as I breathed in just a little bit, doing my best to just try to shake off all of those thoughts from my head at the same time as well.
I sighed just a little bit to my self, as I looked at the street that was beside me right now, as I saw that it was the most busy day of the week of course, and also the fact too was that there was no way that I could be able to get across the road right now, as I wish that there were people that stopped the road for at least a few moments, so that people could go across the road, as I knew that it annoyed a bunch of other people as much as it annoyed me.
I shook off all of those thoughts at the exact same time too how ever, as I knew that it was besides the point at this very moment in time, as I looked over at Paris, as I then saw her nod to me from the corner of my eye, as it was clear that she was trying to tell me that it was now her turn to speak, and she wanted to make sure that I was listening as to what it was that she had to say to me at the exact same time too, which of course, I was, though I did not blame her once again, as to the fact that she might think other wise, as I had to remember that orcs did in fact have quite a short attention span.
I turned my head over to her, as I then all of the sudden nodded right back over to her, to let her know that I was listening to each and every word that she had to say to me right now, even though I really was not all too sure that I was how ever, as I had a lot of thoughts in my head right now, that I just wanted to go away. I breathed in just a little bit how ever, as I then began to hear Paris speak to me all of the sudden, as I listened as to what it was that she had to say to me at the exact same time too.
"Well I told you why Zin! Now come on with me in to the diner, let's sit at the table and I will get you some coffee to try to make you feel a little bit better, hopefully it will calm your nerves just a little bit..." She said to me, as I blinked my eyes just a few times at the exact same time as well, as I then nodded to her once again, to let her know that I had heard what it was that she had just said to me, though I still was a little bit shocked by it.
I was not going to lie, I was not a big fan of coffee, as I was more a fan of alcohol than I was of that, but I knew that the diner did not have alcohol how ever, and it was not really all that appropriate for me to ask for such a drink like that right now, as it still was not even the night, and I was with a nice old lady right now. I sighed just a little bit, as I did my best to just try to shake off all of those thoughts, no matter how much it was that I was craving some good rum right now.
I got my focus back on what it was that was going on right now how ever, as I knew that I was doing exactly what it was that I was trying my best to not get my self to do, not all too long ago, as the lady was in fact trying to make sure that I was paying attention, as I saw her head a few steps ahead of me, as she was about to open the door to the diner, when she noticed she did not hear my obscenely loud foot steps following her, as she turned her head over to me, and she squinted her eyes at me.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I was quite a bit embarrassed by it, as I dipped my head a bit low to the ground, at the same time too, and I did in fact begin to head over to her as quick as I could, making sure that I did not run in to any thing along the way, as Paris then opened the doors to the in side of the diner, which I walked in to first, as I saw a few people look at me at first, due to the fact that I was an orc, but they then ignored me all of the sudden, such as every one did, as they all knew who I was at this point.
I followed Paris, as I saw her heading over to an empty table at the far side of the diner, that I rarely saw any one at, unless they just wanted to be left alone for some odd reason. I did some times go to that table, if I was not going to lie to my self, as I did not ever like to see all of the looks that people gave me, simply because I was an orc, and not because they knew me at all. But if they did know me, they probably still would not like me, if I was going to be completely honest with my self.
I was not an ass hole, and I did not make fun of any one, but I knew that I was not the best influence, and a lot of that might be due to the fact that I was an orc of course. No one really hated me at all, unless it was simply just due to the fact that I was an orc, but not all that many people liked me either way, but I knew that I still did not deserve the looks that people gave me a lot of the time, as it made me feel like I was a freak.
Maybe I was though... I was an orc of course... I sighed just a bit to my self, as I then did my best to try to shake out all of those thoughts from my head at the exact same time too, as I then saw Paris suddenly sit down at the secluded table that she was taking me too in the first place, as it was clear that she just wanted to speak to me in private. It felt like it always was in private, as I knew that people could not stand to be around me, which I was fine with, as they usually did their best to ignore me never the less.
I sighed, as I shook off all of those thoughts all at the exact same time too, and I then suddenly sat down beside Paris, as I felt the couch that we sat on shake a bit, due to the fact that I was so heavy, though luckily it did not break at all for me, at the very least. I blinked my eyes a few times, as I saw that Paris had a bit of a smile on her face, for some odd reason or another, almost as if she was happy to be next to an orc right now, which did in fact make me feel a little bit better at the exact same time too, as I cracked a smile on my own face as well.
I then blinked my eyes just a few times how ever, as I was not all too sure as to why it was that I was at this table right now, if I was going to be honest with my self, as I knew that I had been trying to get back home and get me some sleep as well. I stared at her for just a little bit longer, as I then tilted my head at her at the exact same time as well, to let her know that I was in fact quite a bit lost as to why she had stopped me in the middle of the road, to try to talk to me for what so ever reason.
Paris nodded to me at the exact same time as well, as it was clear that she was waiting for me to speak to her. I blinked my eyes a few times once again, as I realized that she had wanted me to speak to her, rather than her trying to give me advice, such as she usually tried to do, though she really did not know what it was like to be an orc in a human city, I still appreciated the fact that she gave me a little bit of company, and that she could bare being around me, very much unlike a lot of other people.
I then nodded back to Paris, as I was about to speak to her, until I then saw some thing at the corner of my eye, that made me turn my head over to it, to see as to what it was, as I then realized that it was one of the waitresses that worked at this place, as I could tell that she was shaking, as to the fact that she had to go any where near an orc right now. But why did she think that she had to go by me right now any ways? There was nothing on this side of the dinner for any one.
I looked at the lady, as I then saw her all of the sudden, put a mug in front of me at the table, as she then poured out a bit of some creamer from a packet, as it all of the sudden hit me, as to what it was that was going on right at this very moment in time, any ways, as I then watched her, as she then poured out the coffee in to my mug, and once it was full, she then began to head away from me as quick as she could. I looked at the lady with a blank look on my face all the while she had done so.
I then sighed, as I shook off all of those thoughts at the exact same time too, as I saw Paris roll her eyes at the lady, though the lady was already long gone from the table, as it was clear that she had gone to help some one else right at this very moment in time, which I did not blame her for I suppose, as I knew that the lady was simply just trying to do her job, and she did a good job at it as well, as the coffee looked perfect for me to drink out of.
I just was not all too sure if I wanted to drink out of it how ever, due to the fact that I knew that I wanted to get home and get some sleep, and also the fact that I was never the biggest fan of coffee either, as I stared at it for just a few seconds, until I then saw Paris nod to me from the corner of my eye, as it was clear that she was waiting, and that she was expecting me to drink a bit of her city known, and famous coffee, as it was a lot of the reason that people came to this place, not just for the really good food.
I only really came to this place, due to the fact that I liked Paris, as the both of us seemed to get along quite a bit well, and also the fact that I knew that people treated the both of us a bit differently, which was some thing that we had a bit in common with. I stared down at the thing of coffee for just a few moments, as I then kind of gave up a bit on the idea that I was going to go home and get a bit of some sleep, as I then began to take the coffee in to my system, as I was not all too certain as to just what it was that I was going to do tonight, now that I was going to be up for a lot of it none the less.
I suppose, I should just due what it was that I always did, which was of course the fact that I liked to write books for one thing, which was hard for me to do, due to the fact that my hands were so big, but also the fact that I liked to have some alone time to my self at the exact same time too, so that I had a bit of some time to think to my self, and think through all of the things that were going on in my life, both good and bad never the less.
I shook off all of those thoughts all at once how ever, as I took a sip of the good coffee, and I then put it down on the table, and I then nodded to Paris, to let her know that I was about to speak to her finally, which I knew was the whole reason that I was in here with her in the very first place any ways, as I saw her nod back to me, to let me know that she was listening to what it was that I had to say to her, before I then began to speak to her.
"Well Paris... I just, I had a girl that I liked, and I asked her out... She seemed to like me a bit, at least I had thought, but then she denied me..." I said to her, as I saw her have a wide look in her eyes, as it was clear that she knew just who it was that I was talking about in the very first place any ways, as I saw her blink her eyes a few times. Of course she knew who it was that I was talking about, as the word spread around the city quickly, about the fact that there was a lady spending a little bit too much time with an orc. I dipped my head at the exact same time too, as I then saw Paris take her hand off of her lap, as she then reached across the table to grab on to my hand. It made me feel a little bit better at the exact same time too, but I still felt a bit lost, and a bit hopeless due to that fact. I felt like there really was no point in trying any more, as I knew that every response that I was going to get from any one, was the fact that of course 'youre and orc'. I suppose that I would just have to live my life alone, and I would have to live it in a bit of misery. I stared down at the table for a few more moments, until I then all of the sudden felt like there was some thing else that I needed to tell her, just to let her know that it felt like it was not simply due to the fact that I was an orc at all, as I lifted my had up all of the sudden, and I then looked right in to the eyes of Paris, before I then suddenly began to speak to her at the exact same time as well, even though it looked as if she had thought that she was going to be the one that I was going to speak to me, which was not the case at all, as I then saw her nod to me, to let me know that once again she was in fact listening to what it was that I had to say to her in the first place, as I then continued to speak to her. "Well... Not only that, but she then proceeded to go after one of the guys that I hated the most, who I view as my nemesis."
I said to her, as I saw quite a look of shock all of the sudden pop up on to her face, as I could tell that she did in fact feel quite a bit bad for me. I let out a bit of a soft sigh to my self, as if I was going to be honest with my self right now, I did not really feel like I wanted any one to feel bad for me, as I felt like it was time for me to accept the fact that I was an orc, and I was not ever going to find love, and that no human was ever going to want to be with me.
I sighed, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts at the exact same time as well. If I was going to be honest with my self, it really was not the fact that she had denied me due to the fact that I was an orc, as I had seen that coming already, but it was more due to the fact as to what it was that I had said to Paris at the last part, which was of course the fact that she had decided that she was going to go after a big ass hole, in a guy such as Samuel was.
It made me feel sick, as if I was not going to lie to my self either, it made me feel like I could not trust any one any more, if I was going to be completely honest, and dead serious with my self. I wondered if it was some thing wrong with the newer generation, as a lot of my friends had a bit of the same stories as well, as to what it was that they had told me that their girls, or their guys had done to them.
Maybe it was more just due to the fact that no one had matured them selves just yet, and they were still trying to figure out, just what it was that they did and did not like, and just who it was that they didn't like as well. Some people were sick, if I was not going to lie to my self, and I wish that I could say that Addison had not been one of those people, but at the exact same time too, I still felt like you never really could know at all, as I knew that I had heard horror stories about some women, that a lot of men had trusted a lot, and also vice versa as well.
I shivered, as I felt like I should just get over it at this point, and that I should just admit to the fact that I was never going to truly fall in love with any one, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts from my head at the exact same time too, as I saw a tear drop from the eye of Paris, as I then tilted my head a bit at the exact same time too, which had me a little bit lost as to the fact as to what it was that I had might have said to her, that might have her so hurt.
I felt a bit bad for it, if I was not going to lie, as it felt like Paris was too nice of a lady for some one that I wanted to hurt, not that I wanted to hurt any one any ways. I looked at Paris for just a few more moments at the exact same time as well, as I then saw her wipe the tear from her face, as I could tell that she was doing her best to stay strong for me right now, though I could tell that she had some thing in her head right now, that I could tell was bothering her none the less.
I felt a bit bad for it as well, as I really did not come here to try to give her a sad memory, or sad thoughts, as I had not tried to come here in the first place, as I had simply been wanting to go back home, and ask for my father's advice at the same time too. I sighed how ever, as I did my best to try to not get all too worried about any of it at all, as I then saw her all of the sudden nod to me at the exact same time too, as it did a good job of clearing out the rest of the thoughts that it had felt like my mind had been stuck on.
I blinked my eyes a few times at her, as I then all of the sudden nodded to her at the exact same time too, to let her know that I was paying attention to her, as it was clear to me that she was about to speak to me. Paris stared at me right in to my eyes for just a few seconds, as I did my best to stay strong, though I was not going to lie, I still was quite a bit hurt, as I did my best to not focus on any of that at all, as Paris then all of the sudden began to speak to me, as I listened as to what it was that she had to say to me in the very first place, at the exact same time too.
"Well... I was married once too... I have never told you this but... My husband left me, and he took my children with him, and went after another woman, many decades ago, and he left me out on the street, alone, to fend only for my self..." She said to me as I looked at her, quite a bit surprised as to what it was that she had said to me, as I saw her looking all across the diner, just to make sure that no one could hear as to what it was that she was saying, for some odd reason or another, which I tried to not get worried about, as I was sure that she was only doing it, due to the fact that she did not like to tell this story to all too many people clearly. How ever, she was telling it to me, which made me feel a lot better about my self as well, as it was clear that she in fact trusted me a fair bit clearly, which I had thought not all too long ago was not the case at all, simply due to the fact that I was an orc, as a lot of people that I knew was always worried that I was going to stab them in the back and betray them at any time. Clearly that was not the case at all for Paris how ever, which made me feel a little bit better about my self, though I still could not help but to feel just a little bit bad, due to the fact that I was an orc still, and there was no denying that at all at this point, as I shivered just a little bit at the exact same time as well, as I then did my best to get my focus off of all of those thoughts all at once too, as I then heard her start to speak once again, as I lifted my head back up to her, and I then began to listen as to what it was that she had to say to me in the very first place any ways, once again. "I kept on fighting how ever, and my friend gave me business loan to start up this place, which, as you can tell... It's booming... I also now have an amazing husband, though I do not get to see him all that much, I love him to death... That lady that my ex husband went after was my sister... She was always a snake..."
I looked at her, as I could see that not only was she a bit hurt, and a bit sad as to the fact that her first husband had left her alone like that, but also the fact that she was angry due to that fact, as I saw that she had her fist balled up, on top of the table. I stared at it for a few seconds, almost as if I was for some reason worried that she might all of the sudden take a swing at me, which I knew would not hurt me at all, as I shook off all of those thoughts all at once, at the exact same time too.
Paris clearly noticed that it had bothered my a bit, as to the fact that she had her fist balled up at the table, as it was a bit of a childish thing for me to be a bit off on, if I was not going to lie to my self, either, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh at the exact same time too, as I did my best to get my focus off of all of that, as I began to think on what it was that Paris had said to me in the very first place any ways.
I thought about it for a few moments, as our stories did in fact have a fair amount of similarities as well as differences, as it seemed like she had it a lot harder than I had to deal with it not all too much longer ago during the day, as I felt a bit weak, as an orc none the less, as to the fact that I really was going to let that hurt me, and let that have me down for so long, as I stared down at the table for just a few moments, not all too sure as to what it was that was up with me.
I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts as to all of the pain that she had to go through, as it was clear that she had a much different meaning as to why she had told me that story in the first place, as I then remembered that she had told me, that we 'all had to keep on fighting'. That was it, that was what it was that I had needed to hear, as I then all of the sudden at the exact same time too, then remembered as to what it was that my friends had told me about joining the army.
I was not going to join the army due to the fact that I was angry, but I was going to join the army, simply due to the fact that I knew that I had to do some thing to make a change, and I had to get away from this place as well. She was right... I had to keep on fighting, and I did not mean it in the fact that I was going to go fight orcs, of other kingdoms, but I meant it in the fact that my father, had joined the army when he was a lot younger, and he had a wife too.
He had kept on fighting, very much like Paris had told me that I needed to do, as I knew that my father was one of the strongest men in town, not just physically, but also in the mental aspect as well. He had gone through a lot, and he had a lot of people frowning on him, due to the fact that he was trying to raise a baby orc. He had done a good job none the less, though I still felt like a bad person, I knew that I was a lot better than the rest of the orcs were, and I felt like now, I had to prove a point to the orcs.
Maybe, there was a chance that humans and orcs could get along. Maybe they did not want to live in the same place with one another, but just maybe, we could have peace. I was not all too sure about any of it, if I was not going to lie, as I knew that the king of the humans hated orcs, and the king of the orcs simply just wanted to kill all of the humans, as I had been told. It was going to be very hard, but I still felt like I could fight, just like Paris had told me to do, and that I could make a change in the world.
I looked at Paris, with a bit of a smile on my face, as I then all of the sudden nodded to her. I could tell that Paris was a little bit lost by it, but she did in fact smile back at me, as it was clear that she was just glad to see that I was now happy, as she then all of the sudden nodded right back over to me, as I then finally began to speak up to Paris, as I knew that she was listening to each, and every word that I was saying to her.
"Thank you Paris... You really said exactly what it was that I needed to hear..." I said to her at first, as I saw that she had quite a big smile on her face never the less, as it was clear that she was glad that she had made a bit of a big difference in my day. She always seemed to manage to do that how ever, as she was one of my favorite humans to be around, if I was not going to lie to my self. I felt like Addison was also one of those, but now I was not all too sure about any of that any more, as even if she was not fake, I was sure that she did not want to be around me any more, due to what it was that I had said to her after what it was that she had said to me, about the fact that she was dating Samuel, who was one of the guys that I hated the most. I felt like, even if I did try to talk to Addison, such as I did not all too long ago, just about every single day, as we always confessed our feelings and what it was that we were thinking to one another. I felt like, now that she was dating Samuel, and after what it was that I had done, that was no longer going to be the case any more sadly, as I then shook off all of those thoughts all at once, as I saw that Paris still had a smile on her face. I blinked my eyes just a few times, as I then began to continue to speak to her once again, as well. "I need to get back home though, my father needs me..."
I looked at her dead in to her eyes, to make sure that she knew that I was being serious with what it was that I had said to her in the first place. She stared at me right in to my eyes as well, as it was clear that it was a bit of an emotional joy ride, as to what it was that we had both said to each other. I was glad to have Paris around, as I was not all too sure as to what my life would be like with out her, and what it would be like now with out her, as I now felt like I had a reason to join the army.
Paris did not know that I wanted to join the army at all, as I knew that she was against war, and if I was to tell her that was what it was that I was going to go and do now, I was sure that she was going to do her best to go against what it was that I was saying, so I was glad that I did not admit that to her, as I felt like the best advice that I could get right now, was from my father, as I then began to lift my self up from off of the couch, taking the last few sips of the coffee, before I then got up from the table.
Paris had a big smile on her face still, as it was clear that she was happy that I had taken her advice, which I was happy just to see her happy none the less. She was always happy, even if she was just pretending that she was, as I knew that she only wanted to lighten up the day for the customers that came in to her diner. I sighed just a bit to my self, as I felt like none of that really mattered all too much to me at all right now how ever, as I then nodded to Paris, to let her know that I was leaving.
Paris nodded back to me, as it was clear that all was said and done now, as she then got up from the table, and she began to go over to her closest customer, to help them out with what ever it was that they needed help with right now. I smiled a bit to my self, as I some times wondered if I should ask her for a job here, but I knew that it was silly of me to think that I could work here, as I knew that I could not carry food out to people for one thing, as it might break, as I was not the most steady with my footing never the less as well.
But also, there was the fact that no one would want to be around me if I was a waitress either, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh. I also knew that I was terrible with cooking, and cleaning would not work for me either, as I knew that I would break all of the dishes. I sighed a bit to my self all at once, as I shook off all of those thoughts at the exact same time as well, as I knew that I did not need to worry about any of that at all right now, as I knew that I had already made my decision on what it was that I was going to do with my life.
I walked out of the diner, with a smile on my face, as I ignored all of the ugly looks that I was getting from a lot of the people right now, as I knew that I could not let it bother me at all, as I then began to head over to where I saw my house not all too far away from me, from across the street right now. I looked all around the road, as I saw that it was still a little bit busy, but it was not nearly as busy right now, due to the fact that every one had left work at this point, and most people were just going out in a cab, to get some thing to eat for the night right now, as I saw that 2 cabs had stopped at Paris's place.
I could not help but crack a smile, as I was just happy to see that Paris was doing so good with her business, as I then did my best to shake off all of those thoughts all at once as well, as I knew that I was going to be going in to my home, and I knew just what it was that I was going to tell my father. I was a little bit worried about what it was that he was going to say to me never the less, as he had told me a lot of horrible stories about what it was that the army did a lot of the time.
He had told me that he had saved me from the fact that the army was going to kill me. That was basically all that he had told me about the story though, as it always seemed to be a bit of a stiff topic when ever I brought it up to him none the less. I sighed, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts all at once, as well, as I just kept on going on with what it was that I was even trying to do in the first place, which was of course, the fact that I was going back home, to tell my father the news.
All of the news as well, as it was not just the fact that Addison had denied me, but it was also the fact that I had made up my mind at this point, that I was going to join the army. Who knows, for all that I knew, they might put me in to the same group with my father. I knew that he was not the leader of his group, but he was a very high ranking soldier, which was a lot of the reason that he got paid so much. I was not going in to the army to try to get a decent pay check though, as my reason for going in was a lot different.
I nodded to my self all at once, as I got my focus off of all of those thoughts at the exact same time too, as I saw that there was an opening in the road right now, and it was the perfect time for me to run across, even as slow as I might be, due to the fact that I was an orc. I began to run across the road, as fast as my body would let me right now, as I then reached the other side, with plenty of time to spare never the less, as I then grinned just a little bit, as to the fact that I felt a lot faster that time, than it felt like I had ever gone before.
I knew that my friends went in a bit of a racing competition a lot of the times, due to the fact that they knew that they could not beat me in any other sort of competition. I was not bothered by it at all, as I felt like I should just let them have their few moments of happiness, as to the fact that they had beat a very strong orc in some thing. I sighed, as I rolled my eyes at the exact same time too, as I felt like that was not really what it was that my thoughts should be on right at this very moment in time, any ways.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I saw that I was at the front door to the house right now, and I knew that I was going in to there, with the fact that I was going to say some thing to my father, that I felt like was going to be very important, and also the fact that I knew that it might just so happen to change my life for ever, as I breathed in quite a bit heavily, as soon as I reached the front door, as I did my best to try to stay strong, mentally.
I then nodded to my self, as I then began to open the door, all at the exact same time too, as I knew that my father always kept it unlocked, due to the fact that he knew that I could not use a key for one thing, but no one wanted to try to mug the house, due to the fact that they knew that there was an orc that lived there, and they knew what it was that I had would do, if I saw that some one was in my home, trying to steal stuff from us, as I knew that you did not get in trouble for defending your home from intruders.
I sighed, as I then opened the door, only to see that all of the candles were closed right now, which was not normal for my father to do such a thing, as he usually liked to keep the home nice and lit up, which did not seem to be the case at all right now, which kind of had me a little bit lost, but also a little bit worried never the less. I felt like I was being a little bit over dramatic right now how ever, as I felt like that I knew that he was fine, as I then saw that there was some light coming from his bed room right now.
I breathed in just a bit heavily, as I then began to head over to it at the exact same time too. I knew that he would hear my foot steps, but at the same time as well, I felt like I should at least tell him that I was here right now, and also the fact that I wanted to talk to him at the exact same time as well, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh, and I then began to speak up to my father, who I was fairly certain was in his bed room right now as well.
"Father... Harun! I need to speak to you!" I said, keeping my eyes locked on the bed room that had some light coming out of it, as I still was a little bit scared that some thing was about to happen at the exact same time too, as I shivered just a little bit, doing my best to get my focus off of all of those dark thoughts all at once, as I then all of the sudden heard a heavy sigh come from his bed room, which thankfully let me know that he was in side of it right now, luckily enough for me, as I breathed in quite a bit, all at the exact same time too, as I heard his foot steps as he began to head over to the front door, to join me in the hall way right now. I felt a bit bad as to the fact that I was bothering him right now, as it was clear that he wanted to be left alone right now, but at the same time too, I felt like this was quite a bit important, and I really did not have much of any other choice, as I then saw that the door the his bed room opened all at once as well, and he was wearing a robe on, as it was clear that he had been trying to get comfortable by the fire. I felt a bit bad for it, but I shook off all of those thoughts at the exact same time too as well, as I then saw my father nodded to me, as it was clear that he wanted me to go ahead and speak to him, so that he could just go back in to his room and get some rest. I still felt a bit bad for the fact that I had bothered him, but I did in fact nod back to him, as I then began to speak to him at the exact same time as well. "Well... Addison said no... Because I am an orc as you could assume... Though she decided to go after that ass hole Samuel... Not all too worried about any of that though, as I made a decision... I felt like I should let you know... I talked to Paris and I decided on it... I am going to join the army, and who knows, maybe I can join your legion..."
I looked at him for just a few moments, as I saw quite a bit of a look of shock on his face all at once, as I could tell that he was quite a bit surprised, though I was not all too sure as to what part it was that he was in fact surprised about in the first place any ways. Maybe he was surprised about all of it, for all that I knew, as I could see quite a bit of a blank look on his face for just a few seconds, as it was clear that he was not all too sure as to how it was that he should respond to what it was that I had just said to him in the very first place any ways.
I saw him stare me right in my eyes for just a few seconds, as it was clear that he was not all too sure as to what it was that he should say back to me, on what it was that I had just said to him in the first place, as he looked at me for a few moments longer, until he then dipped his head a bit low to the ground for some odd reason or another, which did in fact confuse me just a bit, as to what it was that he was on about right now, as I then saw a bit of a look of what seemed to be guilt pop up on his face at the exact same time too.
It was the same look that I had seen on the faces of my friends, as I knew that they had felt a bit bad for the fact that they had supported me all the way on the fact that I had tried to ask out Addison, as it was clear that unlike her, they did not think of me any different, due to the fact that I was an orc, which I was glad for. How ever, they did think they had made a bit of a mistake in trying to tell me that she was going to say yes, just like my father had.
I sighed, as I was kind of over it at this point, as I really felt like he should not be too over come with guilt right now, as it really did not hurt me all that much, the more and more that I began to think on it. I felt like it did not matter at all to me now, due to the fact that I had found a purpose, and I felt like I might be able to make some thing happen, as I stared at my father for just a little while longer, until he all of the sudden lifted his head up at me, and he then began to speak to me.
I was a bit surprised by it at the exact same time as well, as I felt like he had been a little bit lost in his head to even do such a thing, but I shook my focus off of all of that, as I then nodded to my father, to let him know that he had my attention, on what it was that he was saying to me in the very first place any ways, which of course he did, as I did in fact listen as to what it was that he had to say to me, at the exact same time too.
"Well son... That won't be the case... I was going to take you out to dinner one of these days, and break the news to you..." He said to me at first, as I was a little bit lost on what it was that he was even getting at in the very first place any ways, as I tilted my head a little bit, not too sure as to what it was that he was trying to say to me, as I squinted my eyes at him as well, to let him know that I was a little bit lost. My father dipped his head a little bit low to the ground once again, which was in fact rare for him to not only do it once, but for him to do it twice, I felt like there was some thing that was really up with him right now. What was it that he had meant by what it was that he had said to me in the first place any ways? I sure did not hope that it had some thing to do with my actual parents, as I felt like I did not care for them at all, even if it was not their fault that their village had in fact got raided, I knew that I did not want to grow up around orcs, after what it was that I had been told about how they were. I shivered, as I did my best to try not to get all too worried about any of that, as I was fairly certain that it was not the case at all, as I then looked back at my father, to see that he now had his head lifted straight up, which came as a little bit of a surprise to me all at once, as I blinked my eyes a few times as well, as he then all of the sudden began to speak to me none the less, and I listened as to what it was that he had to say to me, once again. "Well... I just retired from the army you see... But if you want to join the army... I will support you no matter what... You are old enough to make your own decisions..."