I, Devil (a love story)

Chapter Six: Azazel

I found myself back in the current times, 2012, with less answers than before. I went to a coffee shop in southern France where the weather was reflecting exactly what I was feeling. A cold drizzle dusted the streets in gray. It was a coffee shop I had been to before, so I knew the waitresses and the faces. I even ordered things in person, in the flesh, allowing the waitresses to see me and speak to me a little. I'm not a human, so I know that I gave them the 'uncanny valley' creeps-- I could feel it. Yet, they were always polite. I never asked for anything extra, just a black coffee with a little milk and honey.

It was the comfort of the coffee shop that was making me feel restless. I wanted somewhere new, somewhere I hadn't been to. I wanted a new age. The coffee shop was inside of a historic hotel in Aix-en-Provance. I could feel the imprints of history vibrating through the walls. I have been to just about everywhere on Earth, in every timeline, up unto and including the present. What did my brother mean when he said he was going to quit? How was there something new? How did he just make this decision like that? Even though I myself have quit being Prince of Hell, I still envied him a little. I do not know why.

The voice of God had no answers. My brothers had no answers. No one is omnipotent. He's just thinking about quitting.

I couldn't think. I couldn't concentrate. I felt pulled in thousands of directions. There was a part of me that obsessed with what my brother meant. Other parts of me were facilitating functions-- escorting humans to the other side. Answering questions. Answering prayers. Most people prayed to the Devil for things, and I mostly handled issues dealing with love and desire. Yet, no human thought to ask me what I desired.

I care about my brother as we are all we have. On a bad day where lots of people die, I feel shredded. I cannot concentrate as I have to usher people over. I only have so much time in an infinity. I downed my coffee and tried to make a decision. The only thing that felt close to my brother was the human closest to my brother's human. Maybe something will come to me if I do what angels do best: watch people.

The rain was beginning to to taper away. I sat at the window and watched as the gray mist began to burn away. A few yellow rays of sunshine sliced across the sky, one after another. Water settled in between the cracks in the brick streets. I really enjoy providential France. It had certain smells and colors not found anywhere else after a rainstorm. The waitress avoided asking if I needed a refill, so I left a hefty tip.

Without anyone seeing me, I left and went back to Michigan.

Like humans, what angels discover we discover on our own. We aren't told what we are the angel "of" when we are created. We discover our names on our own. Our special 'powers' are no more powerful than a human talent. Something we are good at, a thing that makes us feel who we are. I am a time traveler and technically the angel of death-- which are sort of the same thing if you think about it. Other angels can be 'the angel of death,' too. It just depends on being in the right place at the right time when a human is crossing over. My brother Meresin has a lot of talents, they are just a lot different than mine.

I reached out my senses into the universe. A tangle of vibrations threaded through the air like webbing. I could tell that Meresin was with his human project, Noah, so I decided to go back to haunting Noah's best friend, Joshua.

One of the biggest differences between Meresin and I since the beginning-- was I was always a big picture guy and Meresin was found in the details. It has always been very literal. When the universe was new and creation was just starting, my brothers and I were fascinated with the humans while Meresin was still soaking up the background. He wouldn't stop until he understood every vein of leaf down to its molecule, while the rest of us were discovering things like fornication and seeing what things tasted like. It is no wonder he cracked the code on manipulating viruses. Almost as impressive as operating time.