Here There be Witches

Untitled Part 15

"Uuunnggh..." The first thing Anara registered was pain. Lot's of it. She immediately wanted to go back to the dark world of numbness. There also might have been someone speaking, but she couldn't tell. She quickly stopped trying to roll onto her side. The second thing was that she wasn't in her bedroom, or on the London bridge, or even anywhere in Stein's lab. She didn't recognize the ceiling above her, which made her panic and attempt to move again. Thankfully, a pair of hands latched onto her arms and held her still, keeping her from injuring herself further, despite fighting harder when she thought her kidnapper was trying to restrain her. Not that it mattered, she was groggy and sluggish, any attempts at self defense she made were laughable. Thankfully, there was no kidnapper. Instead, a handsome face made it's way into her line of sight with worried eyes and a soothing voice, and she hesitantly let herself be pushed back onto the bed when she realized who it was.

"Hey, easy now. You're going to tear your stitches open. Just lay down ok, you're safe here. You're at the DWMA." Kid's touch was strong but gentle. "I'm glad you're awake." He looked glad. Anara wasn't sure why she had doubted what he said, but regardless his expression was reassuring. Anara felt herself smiling with him despite having no reason too, then quickly feeling a stab of panic when she realized what must have happened. "I'm gonna go get your dad, ok? He just stepped out for a minute." She nodded. Oh Death, the others must have brought me back! They probably told Kid what happened too! I'm so fucking pathetic, I can't believe I was hurt so badly so easily. They must all think I'm such a nuisance. She could feel her hands start shaking more intensely and salty tears build up in her eyes. No, no, no please don't cry, please don't they'll be back anyminutedon'tcrydon'tcrydon'tcry--

The door opened and in rushed the four she had been in London with (thankfully this time without any breaking things). No Stein or Kid yet. Seeing her friends helped improve her mood immensely, especially knowing that they were safe and healthy. A moment later Hero ran in as well, looking frantic, but soon calming when he saw her awake. He came to hug her and she felt safe again in her best friend's arms. It lasted longer than hugs typically should, but neither wanted to let go.

"Oh we're so glad you're ok!" Tsubaki rushed to hug her as well, which would have been a problem if it was anyone else. No one can be as gentle as Tsubaki, it was truly a gift. Anara returned the hug as best she could with only one arm. When the taller girl stood up again she almost had tears in her eyes (thankfully Anara had managed to make hers disappear).

"We thought you had up and died or something!" Blackstar said crudely. Maka smacked him up the backside of his head. She and Soul both looked incredibly relieved. She supposed this reminded them of what happened to Soul. Especially with it being so recent, Anara started to feel bad again. It was sweet that they were worried for her though.

"He's being himself about it now, but he was really scared for you then," Maka assured her. Tsubaki and Soul both nodded to confirm. Anara smiled fondly, thanking Death that she had such caring friends. Blackstar started yelling nonsense about how he didn't get scared of anything, as they all predicted.

The meister wasn't quite sure she wanted to ask this question, but at the same time she needed to know. "...What happened? Did you get your resonance back?"

"Not at first, but yeah we got it eventually." Maka's minimal explanation was a bit obnoxious, especially considering she had only asked about the resonance specifically because she still felt embarrassed about blacking out. She needed to know how the fight went! How long it lasted and if they were really all ok afterward.

"Oh Maka, you're too humble!" Tsubaki exclaimed. "She used Soul even though it still burned her hands! And they did the witch hunter too! It was really amazing! I'm sorry you weren't able to see it, but if the other option was to keep fighting, then I'm glad."

They did all of that while being out of resonance!? That's incredible! If they can do that then why couldn't I have kept going? Why didn't I try harder? Why did I just let myself...fail? "Oh...wow..." Anara's voice felt stuck on her tongue and all the bad emotions from before came flooding back. "That's really amazing Maka."

The smaller girl blushed. She really was way to humble. "It wasn't that big of a deal. You would have done the same thing in my position."

The look on her friend's face told the injured girl that she really believed it, but Anara didn't. This time she couldn't force the words out. Maybe I would have tried...but I never would have lasted as long as you did. Clearly. I can't even compare...I couldn't match up to that guy in perfect health with my weapons working, but you...I'm so... Any number of adjectives flashed through her head. Worthless, weak, burdensome, stupid, lame, useless, pathetic. Each stabbed her heart with more of that awful consuming guilt and sorrow until it crawled up her throat until she had to hold back sobs. I should just die...everything would be easier for them if I just disappeared.

She locked her jaw shut and motioned to Hero on the other side of the bed. I don't feel well, she signed. Can you tell them to leave...nicely?

"Yeah of course, me too?" He asked gently, hiding a pained look. She nodded. She didn't know how to tell him that it was nothing personal yet, but she honestly didn't want to bother even if she could. She didn't want to bother smiling to say it was ok either. Just thinking of smiling hurt.

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When Stein finally came he was holding dinner, but she couldn't eat. She wanted to sleep but couldn't. She had also already cried herself out and her head felt stuffed with so much fluff that it might just explode and she hoped her eyes weren't too red. They probably were. It probably hadn't actually been that long since the others left. It felt like it had though. Her heart told her that he hadn't come earlier because he heard of her failure and was disappointed. That he had finally realized that she hadn't been worth saving that night so long ago. That he felt stuck with her now and wanted just a little while longer of not having to deal with her reckless issues.

Her brain told her that he was probably just at the lab or doing teacher stuff and Kid (who hadn't returned yet, probably giving them some time to themselves) had just not been able to find him.

She wanted to apologize. For everything. For what a burden she had been the last nine years, for being stupid and not telling him where she went, for getting hurt and not being able to protect her friends, but before she could even try, before he was even sure the plate was stable on the table he nearly tossed it onto, Stein practically crushed her in a hug.

Even he's trembling...

He doesn't hate me...

She wasn't out of tears yet.