Love Is Pain (HxH Au) (Killugon)

Chapter 15

Gon wiped his eyes a little. "a-after we had that talk about the whole 'meet up with father' thing..." he said, and Killua frowned slightly. "I don't remember that, what happened?" Gon suddenly leaned over and hugged him. "h-he was having another one of those panic attacks" but what triggered it? "it was almost worse than the one with the L-Luka incident" his eyes went wide. It was that bad? Wait a moment... if kitten remembers everything I do then... fuck. Him talking about traumatizing memories must have brought it on. Does that mean... that I'm just hurting myself? "you don't mean... Kitten remembers everything I talk about?" Gon nodded, "just because it doesn't bother you, doesn't mean it doesn't bother him"

Well fuck, now he's crying. He sighed heavily, then got an idea. He looked Gon in the eye, then did a cat face. He blinked, then started giggling. Bingo. Leorio made a noise but he ignored it, then he booped Gon on the nose. "Ack!" Killua returned to his monotone expression and crossed his legs, "what was that for?" Leorio asked curiously. Killua huffed. "Gon crying gets on my nerves, so I stopped it. I don't know shit about comforting people but entertaining children I can do" Gon sputtered. "are you calling me a child?" he shrugged. "well it worked didn't it?" he paused. "oh, I guess it did" Leorio snickered, "well you are a little childish-" Gon shot him a small glare. "hey!" Killua blinked. "I've been wondering about something" Killua said, and the other two turned to look at him curiously. Why haven't I noticed until now?

"I've been with you for about three days, do you not go to school?" Gon blinked. "wait a minute, he lives with you?" Leorio half yelled. Gon frowned slightly, "maybe I'll explain the situation later" he then turned to Killua. "also I'm homeschooled" must be nice, you only have one parent and no siblings. "actually, what about you?" he sighed and rubbed the back of his head. "I used to be homeschooled but I don't actually go to school anymore" Leorio looked like he was about to faint. "What?" he shot him a small glare. "quiet your loud ass voice. Kitten is scared of loud noises by the way" Gon gave him a worried look. "is that why you don't have a grasp on certain things most people know?" he frowned slightly over at Gon. "I don't?" Gon sighed, then looked over at Leorio. "he doesn't know what kissing is. I had to show him what a candy bar is as well, he's also not very good at social interactions." Leorio looked skeptical. "can he do algebra?" he blinked. "the fuck is that?" Gon looked really worried now. "when was the last time you went to school?"

He thought for a moment. "I was ten. Once mother took me with her she gave me a tablet and said 'figure it out' " Gon growled. "isn't she like, rich? Can't she just hire somebody to teach you or something?" Killua shrugged off Leorio's shocked expression. "she could, but she didn't. she also lives in an apartment." that seemed to surprise them even more. Then he blinked. "and for some reason I have the master bedroom." they both looked confused as hell. "really?" he nodded. "I will never understand that woman" he thought for a moment. "think I'm gonna bring Kitten again" he closed his eyes and leaned on Gon's shoulder, just in case. He concentrated for a few moments when his eyes blinked open.

Killua was flooded with thoughts of his mother and Alluka and he started to shake. He turned and shoved his face into Gon's shoulder, wrapping his arms around him as well. D-Damn it! It took a few minutes but eventually he calmed down enough and stopped crying. He felt a warm hand ruffle his hair and he leaned into it. "Mh" there was a pause, then he did it again. "I thought you didn't like getting your hair touched" Gon said curiously. Killua shook his head, "I don't...only exception" he mumbled, Gon's face turned a little red again. Why's he keep doing that? "are you sure you're not sick?" Gon's face got even redder and he looked away. "I told you I'm fine!" he frowned slightly. "then why's your face all red?" Leorio put a hand to his head. "are you being serious right now?" he blinked. "nobody will tell me what certain things mean" he grumbled. Gon turned back to him with a smile, "there's some things you just don't need to know Killua, it's for the best"

He thought for a few moments. "ok" and then he booped his head into his shoulder, wanting to be pet again. It felt really nice, he hoped Gon got the message. Gon blinked, then to his delight he started ruffling his hair again. "you really like it that much?" he nodded, then Gon giggled. "your hair is so soft" is it? "So-" Killua flinched slightly, then Leorio toned it down a bit. "so, what are you guys doing out here?" he asked. Gon shrugged, continuing to sift his hands through his fluffy white locks. "Killua made me a skateboard design, we went to go pick it up and stuff" Killua picked up Gon's board and set it on the table, Leorio inspected it. "it's a pretty good design I guess, not that I know anything about skateboards" then he frowned slightly. "except that custom ones are expensive, they go up to a few hundred dollars sometimes" Killua nodded. "two hundred, I paid" Gon frowned slightly. "no, it was 70 dollars, and you gave him a hundred dollar bill. Then an extra hundred to get it out sooner. If you keep spending your money like that it'll be gone really soon" but I have like ten grand.

A few days had passed, he got a bit more used to how the 'outside world' worked. Killua also got some lessons with Gon, math was the easiest for him. Actually it was probably because that the math was on the lowest level of difficulty, the other subjects Gon was working on were harder because he was bad at it. He found that he liked humming and singing to music, especially when in the shower. He also got a computer, it was a white laptop with cat ears and two big blue eyes along the top. He usually used it to watch youtube tutorials on makeup, although sometimes he did listen to music with his earbuds. Killua had made another playlist of songs he liked so sing, instead of ones he just liked to listen to. They also stopped going skateboarding on the route, instead taking new turns and going to new places. Gon was getting better at it as well, which made him happy. Most of the time when he went out, he kind of hid behind Gon and jumped at every noise.

Gon thought it was a good idea to go to a crowded store. Killua jumped at every noise, there were so many people there. "c'mon Killua, I promise it's worth it!" Gon encouraged. But he bit his lip, glancing around fearfully. There were at least 20 people in there. Some were at tables, some in a line, others were just standing around. I can't keep track of them all at once. "how about this, you go sit down and put your music on" he blinked, then slipped his earbuds in and got out his phone. "turn the music up louder ok?" he said, ruffling Killua's hair. Killua still wasn't too sure about this, but as he turned on his music he felt more relaxed. "we are the jack o lanterns in July, setting fire to the sky- " Gon pointed at a table near the back of the room with only two chairs. He nodded and made his way over, then turned up the volume a little as he sat down and faced the wall. Killua remembered Gon's advice: "nobody is there, it's just you and the music." so he rested his chin in one hand and lay the other arm on the table, closing his eyes and starting to hum a little. "Bring home the boys and scrap scrap metal the tanks. Get hitched, make a career out of robbing banks. The world is just a teller and-"

Gon was excited to get Killua something from here. Yesterday he had given Killua Chocolate, Vanilla, strawberry, caramel, and banana flavored ice creams so he could choose which one he liked best. Killua's favorite was chocolate, so he was hoping to get a smoothie for him or something. He peered over the options and saw three that caught his eye. Chocolate caramel smoothie, Choco cream sundae, and Chocolate chip milkshake. Hmm... he decided that the second one was the best bet, then ordered and paid for it. The thing Gon liked about this place was that any shake, smoothie, sundae, or ice cream would come out in less than three minutes. He didn't get anything for himself though, he didn't know what to choose. And this outing is for Killua, not me. He tried everything he could to make him happy, went out of his way to get him to smile. "here you go sir" the lady who was at the counter said as she handed him the sundae. It looked downright delicious, and he was tempted to take a bite. No! it's for Killua. Damn it, it looks so yummy.

1586 words

To be continued...