Faded Memories [Book I]

Epilogue

Hans Diary
If we can't achieve all of those things in this world then I am willing to achieve it with you in another life

There's only one that I can conclude after being with her for how many months ever since that accident happened.

It's that she changed.

No, it's like she's completely turned into a different person. She feels familiar and at the same time unfamiliar. Ang gulo pero sobrang pamilyar sa akin ang mukha niya pero hindi pamilyar sa akin ang mga galaw niya.

I memorized every part of Sabrene before but this is the first time I've felt unfamiliar to her. There are even times I unconsciously keep comparing her to the old Sabrene and to the Sabrene after the accident.

She doesn't eat spicy foods. She's not into seafoods. She wants to play games all day. It seems like she doesn't even like reading books. She's very loud and talkative. She's very outgoing. She wants to laugh a lot.

Ramdam na ramdam ko ang pagbabago niya. Was this the effect of the car accident? The accident is still like a puzzle to me. I don't know why I can't clearly recall what happened in that accident.

And this past few weeks I know she's avoiding me. I can feel how cold she is. I can feel her dull replies and moments whenever she's with me but I just brush it away because I don't wanna make it big deal.

Hanggang sa tuloy tuloy na siyang hindi nagrereply sa akin. Hindi na rin siya bumibisita sa bahay. May mali ba akong nagawa? May nangyari ba? Ayaw na ba niya sa akin? Masyado na ba akong pabigat sakanya? May mahal na ba siyang iba?

I am trying so hard not to overthink but I freaking hate whenever she's cold to me. It's like she's slipping away from me. Ayoko siyang mawala sa akin. Those days that she was gone felt like a hell to me kaya ayoko ng maulit iyon.

Hindi siya pwedeng mawala sa akin.

Busy lang yon. Ako parin ang mahal niya. Magpapakasal pa kami. Oo, magpapakasal kami ganon niya ako kamahal. It'll be fine, Hans. It will be fine.

I was trying to calm down myself when I saw her walking side by side with a guy. Nasa parking lot ako kasi gusto ko siyang i-surprise na ihatid pauwi ng makita ko siyang pinagbuksan siya nung lalake. Sa sobrang bilis ng pangyayari nawala na sila sa paningin ko.

She was smiling with him.

She was smiling lovingly with him while he's opening the door for her. What the hell is happening? Why are they together? Why is that guy opening the door for her? Where are they going?

Sa sobrang gulat sa pangyayari para akong tangang nakatayo sa labas ng kotse kong nag iisip kung ano ang nangyari.

No, maybe it's just her groupmate.

Right. It's just something related to her studies, right?

Right.

I'll just text her. It'll be alright, Hans. Wala lang yon. Don't overthink too much. Sabrene will never cheat on me. I know that. She loves me. She will never cheat.

She's busy because of her studies huh?

Sabrene will never be stress due to her studies. She loves reading so much to the point where she's enjoying because she's learning so much in reading so it's so weird to hear from her that she's stressed with her upcoming exams.

The Sabrene I know will never be stressed with her studies. Ganon niya kamahal ang pangarap niyang maging Doctor na kahit gaano kahirap nag e-enjoy parin siya mag aral.

Sa sobrang pagiging iba niya... kahit alam kong impossibleng mangyari to pero napapatanong na lang ako sa sarili kung siya ba talaga yung Sabrene na kilala ko.