I'll Be Your Strength

"I'm done with myself."

I'm posting so much oh god....might just wait for 3 weeks to post the next chapter.

ALSO this chapter is inspired by the song on the side :)

ANYWHORE, heres chapter 16. Enjoy!

"I'm done with myself" 

Chapter 16:

-ORIS  POV- 

I walk up the stairs, silent tears streaming down my face, as one thought invades my brain.

I'm done.

I'm done with Nathan, I'm done with pretending that nothing happened, I'm done acting like I'm okay, I'm done with myself, for still loving him.

The fading scars on my wrists taunted me as I tried to rearrange myself.

I knocked on Ryan's door, and asked him to bring my suitacse to the room next to him when he could and he quickly replied "Okay!"

I smiled at his eagerness and walked into my room.

The crying had long stopped, but as I close the door,an overwheling feeling of numbness took over,bringing with it new found tears.

I sat down on my bed, and my lips trembled as tears fell down my face. No longer trying to hold in my cries, I lay down and sob over everything. Everything that ever went wrong, and everything that ever made me feel useless, broken and beaten down.

I shook in my clothes and cried my troubles away.

i've had enough of "sticking it out" and "sucking it in", this is it.

I let myself fall apart and cried myself to sleep.

*********************************************************

-RYANS POV

I grabbed Ori's souitcase and dragged it out of my room. As I was about to knock on the door, Ysa attacked me from the side.

We lannded on the ground with a thud.

"Are you stupid?!?" She whispered-yelled at me.

"What??"

"Ori--" She pointed at the door," Is crying you ignorant prick!" 

My eyes widened at the news, knowing what I was about to say next, she said, "Nath and her are fighting."

"Oh right...that." I assumed they would've made up by now, but I guess I was wrong.

Ysa got off of me and shoved me into her room, leaving Ori's bag in the middle of the hallway. She pointed at my chest and firmly told me to stay there before she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.

-YSAS POV-

I walked into Nathans room and saw him furiously writing on a notepad.

"Nath?"

He looked up at me momentarily and went back to his writing.

"Nath she's crying her heart out in there, you two need to stop fighting."

He looked up at me with nothing but pain in his eyes, "You think i don't know that? He snapped at me.

I closed my eyes in shock at his voice, and he sees my reaction.

"I'm sorry."

I shook my head, "It's fine, but you need to come with me."

-ORIS POV-

Whatever many hours later, I woke up. My head was pounding, so I shut my eyes again trying to stop the pain when I heard a slight cough.

My eyes darted to the door and I saw Nath dressed in a suit.

I looked away again, but he didn't leave.

He started walking towards my bed, but I refused to look at him. 

"Ori..." he whispered as though a single word was going to break me, "give me your arm."

"What?"

"Please...just give me your arm."

I didn't budge, so he kneeled down and took my arm cautiously. He pulled my sleeve up and I stared at him in confusion, but he didn't act like he noticed.

Slowly, he started kissing my scars up my arm until he reached the last one near my shoulder. He traveled over to my face and hovered over my lips.

I didn't flinch or move out of the way, but still he breathed, "Can I?"

My eyes widened a little and I nodded my head.

He kissed me slowly, and passionately. When he withdrew, he didn't say anything, he didn't smile either.

Bluntly, as thought it was the most obvious thing in the world, he said "I still think you're beautiful and I don't ever want to lose you, Ori. I need you more than anything in the world."

lets discredit something: YSA + RYAN DID NOT TELL NATH TO DO ANYTHING. ALL OF HIS ACTIONS ARE HIS OWN.