I'll Be Your Strength

"You win."

Yeah sorry if this really sucks but I'm still trying to figure out what to do. Anyways, Happy holidays!

+ this chapter is full of flashbacks(italicized) and filling in missing information so bear with me :)

"You win."

Chapter 2:

-NATHAN'S POV-

"She didn't make it."

I didn't say anything, I couldn't say anything. Nothing made sense. A few hours ago, Bekie was there to wish me good luck, she was smiling and laughing, so why did she end up here? How?

"Why did she--" my voice cracked as I tried to fight back tears "--do it?"

"I don't know," her mom answered between sobs, "I was hoping you would."

"Did she leave a letter? Or a video?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?!? I know she's not that stubborn, she must've left something!"

I started banging the table unconsciously. Why was this happening to me? Why did she leave me?? I can't do this without her, I can't do this on my own. She was my tower to lean on, and I loved her.

-flashback-

"Wow you suck!" She squealed as she reached the park.

"Geez, sorry Bekie not everyone can be as perfect as you..." I winked at her and she stuck her tongue out at me.

"Wanker!" She yelled.

"Oh you're gonna take that back Warren."

"Oh yeah? Because i don't think so."

I started chasing her, through the swings, under the slides and over the benches. I finally caught her in my arms, and hugged her spinning her around.

"I win"

"You win" she grinned at me and I grinned back.

-flashback over -

I stopped banging on the table and turned my back to the wall. I slowly slid down, my life falling apart at my finger tip and I was powerless to fix it. I buried my face in my hands, and let myself cry.

"This was never meant to happen, she wasn't supposed to do this, she wasn't supposed to die..."

-flashback-

"Oh, so you're gonna be joining a band?"

"Yeah..." I didn't want to say anything loudly, in case I'd break her. She wasn't taking it easy, and I couldn't blame her.

"So, you're saying you're gonna leave." She said reluctantly.

"Yeah, but I promise I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure we'll get through" I took her hand and held it tightly.

"So does this mean bitches gon' be hopping on your dick?!?! Cause its mine!" We both laughed, and I as grateful she shifted the mood.

"All yours baby." I winked and she smacked my arm

-flashback over-

She meant everything to me, I woke up just to hear her voice. when I couldn't,she could for me. she was strong enough to take on the world and that's exactly what we did. It was me and her against the world, and we were unstoppable. She helped me through so much, and it wasn't fair how I couldn't be good enough for her. She was beautiful in every aspect, and she captured my attention effortlessly. Every inch of my body yearned for hers. I loved her more than anything, and if she wanted the sun I would give it to her.

-flashback-

"Hello?"

"Heeeeyooooo!" I yelled through the phone speaker.

She laughed at my excitement, "hey babe"

"So guess what? I have good news"

"Ooooooh, you do??"

"Yep... YOU'RE COMING ON TOUR WITH ME!"

"What?! Oh my gosh, are you serious??"

"Why would I be joking about this? Do you doubt me Bekie?"

"Oh yeah, alllll the time...holy shit. Does that mean I'm gonna be bombarded with hate and paparazzi and all that crap?"

"Aw bloody hell" I hadn't even thought about it.

"I think we should keep our relationship secret, and keep it on the down low. I love you and all, but I don't think I can handle any of that"

"Deal."

-flashback over-

I needed her, I still do. She was the reason I haven't give up, what am I going to do without her? She promised...

-flashback-

"I have something to say Nath..."

"What?" I sat up, worry flooding through my thoughts.

"I'm suicidal, and I know you used to be."

We stayed there for a second, neither one saying a thing.

"Promise me you won't ever do it."

"I won't do it if you won't."

"Good" I smiled and stuck my pinky out, "you have to pinky promise though."

She smiled and curled her pinky around mine. "Promise."

-flashback over-

Come back Bekie, I need you back.

I can't do this on my own, Im not strong enough, I was never strong enough. Why would you do this to me?!? Who gave you the right to fall apart on me?

"Stop crying Nathan, stop." I hit the wall before breaking out into tears again. "Stop."

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Okay in case you haven't caught on, Nathan & Bekie were secretly dating since a few years back. Friends & family knew, but it was kept from the paps. Bekie didn't want their relationship to be in the spotlight & Nathan didn't mind.