We Didn't Have a Choice

52 - Understanding One's Story

"Where's Blair?" asked Pansy as we sat in the Great Hall for breakfast only days later after I returned to Hogwarts.

"She's at Edward Estate," I mumbled as I poked at my food.

I missed her so much. It's not easy being apart from her, especially at such a time.

"Seriously?" Pansy whined.

"Yep."

I couldn't help but get a bad feeling in my stomach because I can't help but worry about us falling apart. Anytime I think of being apart from her, I think of what happened with Astoria only months ago, and it makes me worry; what if something similar happens again?

As of right now, Blair and I are on good terms and I hope it stays that way. It's just so hard maintaining a marriage in which you weren't meant to find love in.

When Voldemort married us off, it was for the sake of two things. More purebloods and to make our lives miserable. Obviously, he succeeded at that. He makes sure Blair and I are never comfortable in life, and I hate him everyday for that.

Pansy seemed to notice that I was bothered as she placed a hand on my shoulder. "Draco, don't get down on yourself," she murmured, "it will all be over soon."

I would have ignored her but the way she spoke as if she knew what was going on infuriated me. "Shut up, Parkinson," I bit. "This will never be over. Blair and me have no way making it out of this situation so stop pretending like 'it's almost over!'" I snapped, not caring at all how loud I spoke.

Many heads turned to look at me as Snape rose from the table which the professors sat at, and motioned for me to come with him. So, I followed him outside of the Great Hall and to his classroom as everyone's eyes followed me out of the hall.

"What now?" I sneered as he slammed the door shut and turned quickly on his heel to face me.

"You need to keep your mouth shut. Just because we have control over the school does not mean you can go opening your mouth and dropping hints about your wife's situation," he spat. "The Weasley girl is here after all. Her or anyone else could go right to the Order and tell them what they hear."

I rolled my eyes and started to push my way towards the door; I've already heard enough lectures from all the adults in my life.

"Act like a brat now but you won't be laughing when the mother of your child is dead and whatever protection the Dark Lord provided you is gone," Snape rasped, making me spin quickly.

"Oh, shut the fuck up," I spat. "Being dead would probably be better than living under his control."

His eyes narrowed as he drew his wand and pushed me up against the door, holding me at wand point.

"Don't you dare take her for advantage because the second she's gone, you will regret saying such things," he snarled.

"Like you would know anything about love," I responded breathlessly due to his wand digging into my neck.

His dark eyes pierced into mine. It was the first time I had ever gotten a close up look at them; I had never noticed that his eyes are dark in all ways can be...filled with what looked like sadness. I mean, I knew Snape was as glum as could be, but not once did I take time to really understand him. Just in that moment, I knew there was so much more to this man than he was giving off - so, so much more.

"Trust me, Mr. Malfoy, I know more than you will ever know so stop prancing around like a know-it-all. Your father would be disappointed seeing you act like this," he sneered as he finally released me and shoved me out the door.

Students were beginning to flood the hallway for their morning classes so I hurried to my first class.

-

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-

My days were rather boring. I am constantly checked on by my father or another Death Eater, they don't let me walk farther than the driveway, and I'm basically stuck in my room or the nursery because the house is occupied by Death Eaters.

Of course, Cordelia is who keeps me going.

I love her to pieces.

Her little smile is everything, and her laugh brings me joy. However, it also brings me sadness because it's only a matter of time before she learns life isn't perfect.

Just months ago, my goal was to escape from Voldemort's control, but now knowing that will be impossible, I've settled with a new goal - bringing as much joy to my daughter as I can. She doesn't deserve the life she was born into, so I want to give her as much happiness as I can before it's taken away...like it was for me.

"Blair darling," my mother's voice rang from the doorway of the nursery, interrupting my thoughts.

"Hmm?" I hummed softly, not removing my eyes from Cordi who sat on the rug before me, making attempts to crawl.

"You didn't tell me she was getting close to crawling!" Draco's voice cried.

I nearly leapt from the rocking chair and sprinted over to Draco who wrapped his arms around my waist.

"I didn't think you were coming to visit until spring break!"

When Voldemort had announced I would be staying home for protection and Draco would be returning to school, he also informed us that Draco would remain at Hogwarts till the next holiday, and I would attend meetings alone. This was obviously just another way of him being the bastard he is.

"Well, Snape made a case for me to come home," he replied before leaning in to kiss me softly.

After he pulled away, he leaned into my ear and whispered softly, "apparently in a way, I'm a danger to you by having me walk around places like Hogwarts."

"What'd you do?"

He chuckled softly. "I lost my temper and yelled at Pansy. According to Snape, I also gave information about our current situation, so he had me sent home."

"Draco, for Merlin's sake! He could kill you!" I snapped.

"Blair, he's not going to do anything. Snape altered the story. It'll be fine."