Pacifier

🌿Sam✨

"Della," I said quietly, waking her from a dream in the early hours of the morning. She'd been stirring, she'd been restless.

It might have been weird to somebody else but when I'd come up to check on the two of them before Van and I called it a night, I'd paused in the doorway, mesmerised by her.

She was gorgeous and I'd known that already, but I hadn't seen her so peaceful for some time, and it had been almost a month since the last time I'd lay down beside her and fallen asleep. I hadn't woken up to her in almost a month and so to see her, to be reminded of her delicate beauty when she slept, the firm line of her stoney brows, her square jaw sharp and yet soft because she was sleeping, it took my breath away. Rendered me powerless for a moment.

I hadn't been able to stop myself stepping quietly across the room to her beside. Kneeling down with my head resting on the mattress so close to her sleeping features I could have kissed them, but I didn't.

"Della," I said her voice slow and soft, whispering to her through the darkness.
She wasn't entirely peaceful, I could tell because she was frowning in her sleep, her brows thick and knitted a little wrinkle on the bridge of her nose. "Wake up little one a want a talk t'yer," I said lips grazing her hair as I pushed it from her ear. Her eyes fluttering open as I spoke. Her smirk twitching as she rolled over and looked at me with sleepy sparkling eyes.

"Were you watching me sleep?" she asked, brow raised, that early morning accusation, the devilish way she smiled drawing a grin from me.

"Nah," I said, "a was tryna wake you up want a," I smirked, sort of sneering at her sarcastically as I brushed her hair from her face again, though I was telling the truth. "Want to talk to ya about somat," I said smirking when she smirked and rolled her eyes.

"What?"

I realised I was blushing before I'd even gotten the words out. I felt stupid trying to talk to her about something like this, when her best friend was sleeping beside her. They both looked teenage, the setting didn't align with out reality at all and not only did I feel like an intruder in their peaceful scene. I felt like an intruder with a stupid fucken question.

"Me an you..." I started trailing off, chewing my cheek silently cursing myself for the awkwardness which overpowered me then.

"What about us?" she asked me, yawning and letting her head hit the pillow once more. She looked up at me sort of playful, her eyes curious and wide as she looked up at me through her eyelashes. Her head tilted slightly back, her neck like a swans neck stretching.

I watched her pulse, small and delicate but steady.

"Sam..." she said again drawing me from my thoughts, "what about us?" she asked a second time with a delicate little smile which softened me, made it easier to tell her the thing which had been torturing me all month. The thing that had had me walking on egg shells around her desperately trying to hide how I felt about her.

"A need to tell Van," I said almost sighing relieved just to say the words. She split a grin.

"You woke me in the middle of the night to tell me you wanna get yourself killed?" she bit back her laugh and left me grinning sheepishly.

"No," I smirked, shaking my head, "shut up," I grinned, hand over her mouth when she opened it to try and shoot me down with another cheeky line.

"Shh," i said pressing my finger to her lips, pacifying her then, her voice dissipating, her smile fading as she looked up at me momentarily mesmerised. She was quiet, her eyes softened.

Then she reached with her hand and wrapped her fingers around mine, she didn't push my hand away but she looked up at me and asked me her question.

"I don't really think he's gan kill you," she said, "do you?"