February Ashes

Like Me.

If you think like me, you get overwhelmed.

And stay up until 3am at night.

You try to find ways to satiate everyone's expectations of you.

You break your heart in pieces and give it away like extra change.

But darling, you must stop.

If you love like me, you over-communicate.

You count on her, you count on him to keep your sanity and happiness stable.

You wish on lucky numbers, shooting stars and 11:11s.

Hoping, praying for the fair weather to remain, so your fair-weather-friends can stay.

But darling, you must stop.

If you work like me, you categorize your priorities, yet never care for your health.

You're told you never take things seriously, and never work hard, yet you feel like you overwork yourself.

You hurry, rush through things to be free, to rush yet again through a new task.

If you act like me, you scratch your arms, your thighs shake, you crack your fingers.

And you overthink until your mind gets tired.

You keep emotions from last years' experiences concealed, yet those ones taunt you at night.

If you've been broken like me, you've grown to hate vulnerability, you've learnt to be cautious enough to doubt someone's intentions, and learnt to run away.

If you're anything like me, you bleed ink.

Forming words of a thousand echoes, of millions of emotions that are stuck in your soul.

You've learnt to appreciate your real friends, and managed to live with the reputation your fair-weather-friends created when a thousand thunderstorms invaded your forest.

If you've risen up like me, you've learnt to rise slowly, and you've grown stronger than steel, but still light as a feather.

Your self love has yet to improve, but you're proud of the humongous improvement since your 2015 days.

If you're anything like me, you say to yourself.

"Your heart shall remain open, but doors will close to the ones who once tried to destroy it"

If you're anything like me.

I'm sorry, darling.

But, hey.

It's going to be okay.