her ocean eyez

chapter 14

A/N: this update is for @bwubwub

It was the roar of the crowd that was almost deafening. Their chants only growing in intensity, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to stand on end. I looked out over the sea of people, it's horizon seemingly never in sight and felt a swell of pride. Crowds at my shows were never this loud, never this colossal, and I wasn't ashamed to admit it. Billie was fidgeting next to me, adorned in her matching orange shorts and hoodie, plastered with her own name in various fonts. She had her hair tied half up in a bun, two strands fell delicately into her eyes as she looked down at her hands. Her thumb ran over the base of her microphone, making nervous circles on the smooth metal. The intro sequence began and I watched her tense up. The urge to comfort her rose in my chest, but I withheld my hands. Her stage hands had instructed me to stay at the barrier of side stage while pushing Billie onto the taped 'X' on the floor. She looked up at me now and I could see the anxiety that flooded her features. I flashed a reassuring smile and mouthed a "Good Luck" as the tension of the opening synth only mounted.

The three paneled screen lit up, flashing it's familiar haunting images of spiders and teeth. Finneas, dressed in all white walked onto stage right across from where Billie and I were. I watched him take his place behind the piano as their drummer, Andrew simultaneously took his seat at the drumset. The screams grew, mounting to a swell of sound that felt like it would knock me over with it's might. The lights flashed, the screen strobed, and the sound built, louder and louder and louder. Black then white then gray then back to black, the screen flashed, chord after chord was blasted through the speakers, until Billie was walking past me, to center stage. She stood, the screen illuminating her silhouette, and as the audience held their breath it felt as though she was suspended there, with the eyes of everyone on her and I felt my heartbeat quicken. She was still for only a moment, but it felt like it stretched on into eternity, before the bass of "Bad Guy" kicked in and she was jumping up and down and along the stage. The crowd seemed to move as a unit, following Billie's every move. I could only watch in awe as the persona of anxiety a minute ago had melted into the stage presence of the Billie Eilish. She was a rockstar, plain and simple.

My eyes followed her as she moved across the stage, always in time with the beat as she sang, breathy and low into the mic. The audience echoed every word and their volume almost was enough to drown out Billie herself. The focus was on her and if I was able to tear my eyes away I might've been able to take in the massive amount of people that filled the auditorium.

As if to keep us on our toes, as soon as I began to get comfortable with the volume, the outro to "Bad Guy" snapped into play. The lights switched red, the bass kicked in and she began her strut down center stage. I watched, her hips swaying as she delicately placed one foot in front of the other. Her lips pressed into the mic as she whispered, deep and raspy "I like when you get mad," She pointed at the crowd, no doubt singling someone out she knew would go crazy. I watched her head tilt down, knowing the kind of face she was putting on, her eyes low and smile tilted in a smirk. "I guess I'm pretty glad," She paused, giving a little sassy nod, "that you're alone." I watched as the fans at barrier shoved each other, some shouting, some crying, and grinned, knowing they all wanted the one person that was mine. "You said she's scared of me?" Her voice was dripping with mockery. "I don't see what she sees, but maybe it's 'cuz I'm wearing your cologne." She hit the beat with a pop of her neck and finished out the song chanting, "I'm the bad guy." As her moans and the high-hats filled the space and the fans went wild.

The lights went black, the song ended and the only sound was the crowd. When the stage was once more illuminated Billie had returned, the facade of "Bad Guy" gone as quick as it had appeared. She smiled, so wide the little dimples appeared in her cheeks. She turned to the side lightly, just enough to catch my eye and flashed me a smile that made my heart flutter. I smiled back, seemingly the only thing my face could do at that moment was smile, my cheeks already sore and heart beat already maddeningly fast. She turned back to the audience, grinning ear to ear, sheepishly looking at the crowd as she stumbled toward the front of the stage.