But Still I Hold On

#4

I woke up to an empty bed. I looked around and didn't know where the hell I was until Carlos walked into the room. My head was hurting so I couldn't think straight.

"Morning Sunshine," Carlos said as he sat on the edge of the bed. He was shirtless and wearing black basketball shorts.

"Good morning." I looked under the covers and noticed that I didn't have anything on but one of Carlos's shirts. In my head I'm thinking I had sex with him I was hoping that wasn't the case.

"Don't worry nothing happened in the middle of the night you got up and took your dress off you said it was hot so I gave you one of my shirts."

"Thank god."

He laughed a little. Carlos is so sweet I wish Alex acted more like him. I got lost in my thoughts until my phone started ringing.

"Hello."
"Hey Jess it's May"
"Yeah, I know your number is saved in my phone."
"Oh yeah, anyway where are you?"
"I'm at Carlos's house."
"Omg did you get some last night?"
"Girl no"
"Why not? It's Carlos!!!"
I laughed because I realized my best friend was crazy
"Aye, I gotta go but let's meet up later."
"Okay, I'll see you later then."

I flopped down on Carlos's bed. He laughed a little got on the bed and laid next to me.

"You wanna go get coffee?"

''I gotta go home and change."

"I could take you just in case Alex is there."

I looked at him and smiled a little. He cares so much and it's so sweet.

" Okay let's go."

We got up and got in his car. On the drive I was thinking about the fact that I have to face Alex I need to tell him that I know he's cheating but I know it won't end well. But I know I got May and Carlos. I spent the whole car ride thinking about the fact that the love of my life had turned into the guy he promised to never be. We pulled up in front of me and Alex house.

Carlos looked at me. "You okay?" "Yeah, I'm fine." I lied I was in pain I didn't wanna see Alex at all. "I'll go in with you."

"Alex will be pissed if he sees you bringing me home." " I don't care." I looked at him and smiled. "Okay."

We got out of the car and walked to the door. I took out my key and unlocked the door. When I walked in I saw Alex sitting in front of the TV watching Demon Slayer. When he heard me come in he paused the TV and turned around. He was about to say something when Carlos came in.

"Hey Jess, You been gone since last night I was worried."

" Not worried enough to call apparently." before I could hear what he said I walked upstairs to change. When I closed the door somebody blocked it and came in. Of course, it was Alex.

He looked me up and down as if he was looking for answers. "What?'' "Is that Carlos's shirt?" I looked down and forgot that I still had on his shirt. "Yes, he gave it to me."

" Wait so that means you were with him last night and not with May."

"I was with May but after she left the club with some guy I called Carlos and I want to his house."

"Why the fuck didn't you just come home?"

"Because I didn't wanna deal with you."

"No you fucked him didn't you."

"No you idiot he was being nice and helped me."

He rolled his eyes as if I was lying. I ignored him and changed into some black shorts and a black crop top.

I walked past Alex and went downstairs to Carlos. I slipped on my black Crocs and got my keys. Alex came down before me and Carlos could leave.

"Where are you going now?"

"I'm going to get coffee with Carlos."

"Hell no bro you staying here."

Me and Carlos looked at each other then looked at Alex. "Yo Alex chill I'll bring her back."

"I wasn't talking to you I was talking to my bitch."

His what? I felt my body filled up with anger. I had to let it out.

"I'm done.'' that's All I could say is I'm done. I didn't wanna be with him anymore I was done. For good. Never thought I could hate him as much as I do right now.

"You what?"

"I said I'm done. I'm not doing this anymore."

"You can't break up with me because I won't let you go fuck on my homeboy."

" I'm not fucking on Carlos see I'm not you."

"What are you even talking about."

"I know about the bitch you been fucking."

"She told you? I knew she would. Look it only happened like 3 times and me and May were both drunk we didn't tell you because.."

I cut him off after I heard her name. "MAY??" with that, I couldn't hold back so I punched him in the face with all the force in my little body.

He fell so I got on top of him and repeatedly punched him. All I saw was red. I wanted him dead. Carlos grabbed me off him. I screamed from the top of my lungs.

"LET ME GO CARLOS."

"Jess calm down please." I looked down at my hands and saw blood. I busted his lip and broke his nose. I didn't care though he deserved it. "Come on Jess lets go." Me and Carlos walked out and got in his car. In his car, I broke down crying. I couldn't help it. I was hurt. My best friend and Alex. Thinking about it only made it worse. I felt like I just lost everything.

"We can go back to my house instead of coffee."

"Yeah let's do that."

Carlos looked at me with sadness in his eyes. He held my hand before he started to drive. On the drive back to his house I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that the only other 2 people in my life were sleeping together. God, what was going on? Was I just having the worst luck ever?

We arrived at Carlos's house and I didn't wanna move so I just sat there. He sat in the car with me. "They don't deserve you sunshine." I looked at him and smiled a little.

"I thought I was a good girlfriend. I was doing good I tried and still, I wasn't good enough." tears started to run down my face. "hey hey don't cry." Carlos reached over to my side and wiped the tears off my face. "You got me i promise you will be okay you can stay with me for as long as you want i got an extra room we can be roommates." he smiled a little and held my hand.

"You sure?" "Of course"

I smiled. He made me feel better I was still hurting but he made me smile.

We got out of the car and walked into his house he showed me the extra he had and told me it was mine. I agreed to stay with him cause I had nowhere else to go.

After that, we just chilled and watched TV we laughed and everything was all good until my phone started to ring.

I was May Carlos looked at my phone and then looked at me. Seeing her name made all them emotions come back up.

Should I answer? or Let it ring?