THINKING ABOUT IT.... (CHRIS EVANS FANFICTION)

Part 15 -Worth the try

''Hi.'' She said in a sleepy voice. She was so glad to see him, but also very afraid of what he has to say.

''Hey.'' He responded in a tone that gave Jamie hope this is gonna end well. She moved from the door and motioned for him to come in.

The silence was heavy, even slightly awkward as they walked inside and sat on her couch. Jamie would most rather stay in complete dark since she just woke up, but she turned on a lamp enough to see Chris' face clearly.

Even though Chris wanted to come here, and was determined to see her, now he can't bring himself to say anything. He doesn't even know where to begin.

Jamie is still slightly shocked, she definitely hadn't expected him to come and see her so her mind is fuzzy and all the things she planned to tell him seem locked away somewhere in her brain where she can't reach.

She clears her throat and decides to say something,

''I'm sorry I lost my shit like that.'' She says. At least she broke the silence... He looks straight in her green eyes that show nothing but regret. Though, his eyes don't mirror any sign of anger as she expected them to.

''I'm sorry I pressed you to tell me what was going on...'' He apologizes, but he does feel like he had the right to know. Still, the way he did it was clearly wrong, he didn't keep his cool so things just exploded completely. She shakes her head, cause he really shouldn't apologize for something like that,

''That's dumb, don't apologize for that. I know I'm not the most open person in the world and you have to drag information out of me...'' She says and Chris feels the urge to wrap his arms around her, but maybe it's too soon to do that.

''Jamie, I was so fucking confused. I couldn't understand what was going on, half the things you were saying were making zero sense to me....'' He starts but she cuts him off,

''I know...I know.'' There's heaviness in her words. She feels guilty for the shit she said... But what's done is done, she needs to do as much damage control as possible. ''I also know you never saw me lose my shit like that.'' Chris nods and looks her in the eyes, she feels like she might start crying at the thought of never seeing those eyes again. She stands up and goes to the bathroom, leaving Chris slightly confused. She takes a really deep breath, filling her lungs to their maximum and releasing it slowly. A couple of splashes of cold water on her face make her mind instantly sharper and when she finishes up she comes out and sits besides Chris again. He notices a change in her posture, she seems more like his Jamie now.

''Okay, first off, I wanna apologize for taking it all on you. It was very wrong, my mother made me crazy and I usually manage to keep her out of my head but she got the best of me and you didn't deserve to be on the other side of my anger...'' She says what has been like a rock on her heart since the fight. Chris nods so she continues, ''I also know I said some things to you, that I definitely didn't mean, and generally I was so angry, I was saying a lot of shitty things.'' Her voice gets slightly smaller as she says this. She still can't believe her mother got to her that bad....correction: she can't believe she let her mother get to her that bad. Chris watches her carefully, ''I also need you to know that the comment about strangling my mother was my anger talking.'' Now her voice is closer to a whisper than her usual volume. Guilt washes thru her at the mere thought of what she said, and the look on his face when she said she was dead serious makes her wanna throw up.

''I know that.'' Chris says immediately making her feel a little better, ''I should have stayed calm and not yell at you. I'm sorry for that.'' She feels the need to tell him it wasn't his fault, but something tells her he'll appreciate it more if she just accept his apology. So she does. ''Jamie, I need you to tell me what the hell happened. I witnessed your mother saying horrible things before but you never flipped out like that.''He says and Jamie nods, knowing she's gonna have to tell him everything.