𝑰𝑴𝑨𝑮𝑰𝑵𝑬𝑺 - måneskin

victoria de angelis

"Victoria is gone, almost every day"

(your name is Alicia)

***

The door unlocked and there she was, my girlfriend. It's ten PM and I have no fucking idea where she has been all day, this morning when I woke up, she already left. "I'm home, my love", she yelled throught the house, and the only one who seemed happy to see her was our dog Chili. I see her cuddling on the floor with our dog. "Where were you whole day?", I sound like a mother, but I just wanna know where my girlfriend is the whole day, since she never tells me anything, and I'm a little sick of waiting for her to come home every single day. She looks up, a little shocked by me not welcoming her.

"Hello to you too", she gets up and wraps her arms around my neck, pressing her lips on mine. "Victoria, why are you always gone, every day". She was shocked by the fact that I push her away from me. "Baby...", she says, grabbing my hand. "Do you think I like being here on my own all day, every day, wondering where my girlfriend is", tears were already gathering in my eyes, and she just stood there, saying nothing.

"Please, at least just tell me where you go, before you leave the next time.", Ignoring her, I walk towards the kitchen, where I made diner. "I have work, with the band, you know that Alicia". "Every day, every fucking day?", the tears in my eyes were about to roll down so I wiped them away. "And you never let me come with you, and I'm never allowed to come with you guys on tour. Do you think I don't like that", I snapped, while setting up the tabel for diner. "Are you ashamed of me?", I snapped again. Desperatly waiting for Victoria to answer.

"Aren't you happy for me?", finally she opens her mouth to say something, and I turn around to look at her. "Of course I am, but please, think about me for once. I wait for you, every day and you always come home late.", I am not finished saying what I want to say, but I have to breathe right? "And every day, I keep making you diner although it's past ten, and every day the house is clear so you don't have to worry about that.", the sight in my eyes is blurred, since tears were covering them. "And it's okay, I love taking care of you, but you never involve me in something what's going on in your life. Just think about me for once.", I was done talking, and ran away to the bathroom, since that was our only door who able to be locked.

"Alice, you know I have work, and how you are acting right now, is maybe because you are just not happy for me, because we won Eurovision.", she yells through the house, and slams the front door. Then it's quiet for minutes long. I quietly sob, hoping for Victoria to come back home. Chili lays on our bed, on Victoria her side, and I lay down next to the dog. I hear noises in our house, Victoria is probably home again. The little dog starts barking and bites in my finger, hard. "Do you also hate me, Chili?", I snap at the little dog, and I know I'm not supposed to be angry with a dog, but I just need my girlfriend to be here.

"I don't hate you, Alicia, you know I don't". It's Victoria who is standing behind me, but I ignore her, with my back towards her. "I love you Alicia, and you know that". "Tell me, tell me why you don't want me in your life". I sob, trying to do it unnoticeable, but Victoria does hear it. "Please don't cry, my baby.", her arms wrap around me and she lays down next me, making me look at her. "I just don't want the world to know about us, you know what happened to Dami and Gio, they were getting stalked. I don't want that baby, I want you all for myself". Soft kisses land on my forehead, and she wipes my tears away. "And you never asked if you could come on tour, and if you want, you can, I would love to not miss you for a whole month.", she chuckles, pulling me closer to her.

"I am happy for you Viccy, I'm sorry", I say, when I stopped crying. "Don't apologize, I'm the one who should be sorry". She cupped on my cheeks, and made me look in her eyes. "I love you, Ali", "I love you too, Viccy". We both just look at each other, smiling, before Victoria decides to kiss me, rough. I moan in relief when her pink lips presses on mine. She rolls over, to lay on top of me, and I grab her hand. "I love you so much", she says, before her lips disappear in my neck, making me moan even loader.  

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awhh how sweet can someone be???