Nitric Oxide (Eng)

Don't Leave Me

Taehyung feels like he is at the very bottom of the ocean, where sounds can hardly reach him at all. The dim light tries to break through, irritating his eyes even through his closed eyelids. Taehyung feels an unpleasant tingling sensation all over his body, and pain in some areas that prevents him from moving even a little. With each passing second, the sounds become louder, clearer, and the light stabs at his eyes more and more. Taehyung grimaces in pain and swallows the heavy lump stuck in his throat. His mouth is dry and he is terribly thirsty.

Taehyung hears footsteps and muffled conversations behind the wall on his right side. On the left, the noise of the street, coming in through the half-open window. A warm, pleasant breeze gently touches his skin. The omega slowly opens his eyes, immediately squinting at the bright white light that envelops the bright hospital room. A golden ray of sunlight stretches from the window, glides across the floor and falls on the bed with snow-white sheets. Taehyung follows it with an unhurried glance, colliding with a head of light brown hair. The golden sun gets tangled in the alpha's hair and moves further, along his broad back and the back of the chair.

Jungkook sits with his head resting on his arms that are crossed on the edge of the bed. His breathing is even, barely audible, and his eyes are closed. He's asleep. Taehyung forgets about everything around him, before he even manages to completely wake up. He slowly, not without pain, lifts his hand from the bed and involuntarily reaches for the alpha's hair, burying his fingers in it and gently stroking it. It's soft, and it smells nice, soothing. Familiar. It's like Taehyung hasn't felt that scent in ages, the softness of his hair and the warmth of his tattooed skin.

The omega closes his eyes and gently draws in the air with his open mouth, immediately wincing from the pain piercing his ribs. It takes a while before he realizes what has happened. Taehyung looks at his wounds and doesn't recognize himself, as if he were looking at someone else. Someone else is lying here with painfully pale skin, covered with cuts and abrasions. He sees only small fragments in his head. The impact, the ringing, the bright light of a car's headlights and his own cough, hurting his throat.

Taehyung barely remembers what happened after the first impact. Poisonous gases filled his lungs and crept into his consciousness, shutting him down almost instantly. His hands desperately clutched the steering wheel and his foot hit the brake pedal. It was useless. A glowing red speedometer with the needle stuck on three hundred flashes before his eyes.

"I'll help you. We'll figure something out."

Taehyung abruptly opens his large, glassy eyes, staring in front of him with a shocked look, in which one emotion instantly replaces the other. Disbelief, fear, terror, pain.

Jihan had helped him.

That thought almost instantly appears in his head. It makes Taehyung want to howl, to tear himself apart, to tear his own flesh, to get inside himself and pull it all out so he can breathe freely. Nausea rushes to his throat, and tears immediately gather in his eyes. The omega sobs softly, barely audible, and unconsciously squeezes Jungkook's hair in his fingers.

The realization comes over Taehyung, and it makes him feel so disgusted that he'd rather be dead. He feels like a powerless toy, a toy you can do whatever you want with. Not a human being, just a plaything for personal use. Jihan pushes him lower and lower, makes him feel like a shell of himself, not worthy of a normal human life. Not worthy of freedom of choice. It feels vile. Painful.

The head under his fingers starts to move, but Taehyung doesn't react in any way, unable to bring himself to remove his hand. He keeps looking in front of him and bites his trembling lip, his tears rolling down his face and breaking on his own bandaged chest.

"Tae..." Jungkook calls in a voice hoarse from sleep, raising his head and covering the omega's hand with his.

Hearing the voice he's grown fond of, Taehyung turns his gaze to Jungkook and squeezes his hand back as hard as his weak and exhausted body allows. He is either pained or relieved to realize that Jungkook is looking at him right now. Him . Not at the mask that he has to cling to whenever the alpha is around; not at the charming smile that he uses as a defense mechanism, the mask that keeps all the ugliness hidden, trapped in his very soul. Jungkook looks at him with undisguised concern and even fear. And Taehyung wants to burst into tears, sob out loud and hide in his strong embrace. He wants to tell him everything, to get rid of the heavy weight dragging him down. Taehyung wants to be free of the filthy, shameful lies. To sincerely smile at Jungkook, without showing how depressed and broken he is inside. But he has no strength.