Boy Next Door~ l.h

Ch. 26

Chapter 26

Luke's POV

"Mr. Luke? We need to tell you something important," the doctor said as he walked into Lesley's room. Lesley and I had been in the hospital for a few days and Les had been unresponsive. 

"What?"

"Lesley isn't getting any better. So, we need to... take her off the ventilator."

"What?!?! Why?!?!" I practically screamed.

"It isn't helping her at all," he explained.

"You are taking her chance of living. Its basically murder!!!" I yelled, a tear going down my cheek.

"I'm sorry, sir. Her legal guardian has already signed the papers," he said walking toward the door.

"Her legal guardian is why she's in here. He wants her to die," I said with anger.

"I'm sorry, he signed it before they arrested him. We cannot do anything about it. You have a few hours with her" he said walking out the door.

"He's an *ssh*l*," I heard my mum say from the door.

"They're taking her off the vent, mum. She's going to die," I said crying my eyes out.

"There's still a chance she'll make it," mum said hugging me.

"It's very slim." I sobbed. We were both quiet for a moment before I chocked out, "I love her so much."

"I know you do baby," mum whispered, her crying as well. 

"...call the boys please," I said quietly. 

"Okay," she said grabbing her phone out of her pocket. She dialed Ashton's number and told him everything. 

"Tell him to bring the note," I said to her. 

"Luke wants you to bring the note," she repeated. 

"W-w-.... okay," I heard him say with a worried tone.  They hung up and within minutes the three boys, Ali, and Dustin walked through through the door. 

"Whats wrong?" Dustin asked.  

"T-they...they are taking her off the ventilator," I said, tears rolling  down my face. 

"W-what? No," Ali said almost crying. I nodded and we all got into a group hug. 

"Why did you want the note?" Ash asked. 

"I'm going to read it to her before they turn it off," I said whipping my tears. 

We spent a few hours, just talking to Lesley, hoping she heard us. Ash handed me the note and I grabbed Lesley's hand. 

"You want to be alone?" Dustin asked, still crying hysterically. 

"No, I want you to hear this too," I said unfolding the note. 

"Dear Lesley," I started to read. "So, I’m guessing when you read this, I’m dead. Don’t cry, my love. I will always be with you. But, someday, I know you will move on. So, here are some things I would like you to know before you do.

Be with someone who falls in love with your naked soul first, not your naked body. Find someone who knows you’re sad just by the change in your tone of voice. Be with someone who loves the feature you hate the most. Fall in love with someone who looks at you and knows they don’t want anyone else. You deserve someone who knows how to make things up to you after hurting you. Not someone who is very good with the word “sorry”. You deserve someone who says, “I need you, I’m my best when I’m with you.” You deserve someone who will love you more than I did, which was a lot. I want you to find a boyfriend like me, but better. I want you to be picky until you find that person who treats you like a queen, not a slave. I want you to be with someone who kisses the ground you walk on, not someone who throws you down on it. I want you to be with someone who touches you like you could break with any force. But, I want you to be happy. 

 know my writing sounds like I’m from f*ck*ng Shakespeare times. I’m not much of a writer, more of a drawer, as you know. Speaking of, I would like if you donate my supplies to the art teacher. I overheard her saying she’s running low on supplies. Oh, and my things. Just split it between you, the boys, and Mum. But I do want you to have my drawing pad: most of the stuff in it is for you anyway.               

I’m just thankful for the life I’ve lived. I’m thankful for the friends I’ve made. Ash, Cal, and Mikey- Dustin and Ali- Mrs. Johnson. My family, my school life, my home. But I am mostly thankful that I met you, Lesley. You were the source to my happiness, my soul mate. I might not have got everything I wanted in live- a wife, kids, to go to college, become a rock legend. But, this world is not a wish granting factory. I did get something I had always wanted. I found love with you. You’re the one designed for me.

Just promise me something, do not go back to cutting because of my death. If you start cutting, please know that I will not rest in peace. Do not grieve over me; I was just a helpless soul that was in love with music, and his amazing girlfriend. You have a good long life ahead of you, filled with great and terrible moments that you cannot even imagine yet.

I love you so much, I’m so happy I found you.  I’m so happy that you were my first and last love. I’m so thankful I shared so many happy memories with you. I love you so much, don’t ever forget it. If you feel alone, just remember I will always be with you. I hope you have a happy life and find someone who will truly love you, like I did.

Love, Luke." I was bawling my eyes out, but I knew she heard me.

Two hours. Two hours after they took her off the ventilator is when she stopped breathing. I literally felt as if I was stabbed in the stomach. I felt paralyzed, terrorized. She was dead. Before, she was warm and soft, happy and always smiling. And now?

Now, she was getting colder by the minute, more dead with every breath we took. I had lost something important and I need it. I wanted it. Craved it. But I couldn't have it. 

I don't know what happened after she left. Mum says I was out of control. Kicking and screaming and crying. I take her word for it, I blacked out. 

But what I did know was this: 1) I had lost the love of my life, 2) I had planned to propose that night and 3) I was never going to be able to kiss her lips again. 

I had lost my love, and I wanted to die so much. 

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.................I'm sorry..................

stay beautiful

-M