Grey Waters

2: Kennedy

I got home to Ocean Shores the next morning at 10:18 and was already ready for the day to be over. Waking up to Coco scratching at the carpet in my room, which resulted in it in shreds, was the first straw. Then my toast got burnt so I had to have bacon and eggs individually, which is gross. And then my heated seat in my car wasn't working. What did I do to deserve this? Overall a 3/10 morning.

The positives so far, though, are that I finished my book last night and it was amazing. I get paid tomorrow, and the drive was very therapeutic, despite the broken heated seat. I also happen to be having an exceptionally good skin day, having put pimple patches on everything before bed. I've learned over the past couple years to always look at things as the glass half full. Everyone can use more positivity in their lives.

I pull into the driveway and look at the white brick ranch style home. My mom bought this house when she remarried to "get a fresh start." It was originally pretty run down but she painted the brick, put in new black windows, and landscaped, and voila, beautiful. My moms car isn't in the driveway but a white sedan is, which I assume is Marks, my moms new husband. They got married about 5 months ago, after dating for less than a year. He gives me the creeps. But for my moms sake I'll try my best to get along with him.

My sisters already opening the door by the time I'm out of the car, blonde hair flying around her, sprinting down the concrete path and throwing herself into my arms.

"KENNEDY, I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HOME!" She shrieks in my ear, driving any thoughts of my bad morning away.

"Hey baby cakes, I missed you." I smile. I honestly feel more like crying all of a sudden than laughing. I don't even know why either, I guess I must have been lonelier than I thought. I did have a nice talk with the lady at starbucks this morning though. I told her about my plans for the weekend and the book I finished last night. She didn't reply much and ended up closing the window on me mid sentence but it's okay because she was probably just having a bad day. I'm not taking it personally.

"I'm so glad you're home I can't take anymore of mom and Mark. They're still in their honeymoon faze and it's traumatizing." I wince as she talks, because yeah, traumatizing.

"Well you've got me for 3 days so let's get this party started." I say as I pump my hands in the air. "First though, I gotta eat something and put in some laundry because, my god, am I starving and do you know how expensive it is to do three loads of laundry a week at a laundry mat? And how much effort it is and time it takes? I hate it."

"I'll do you're laundry, you eat something. But don't touch any of Marks gluten free stuff, he's weird about it."

I frown at the idea of Mark not letting Sarah eat certain things considering my moms probably the one buying them but just say, "Okay."

An hour later Sarah and I are walking into our favourite little cafe in our small time in Washington. It's cozy and warm and has the best white mochas ever. I order and pay for both Sarah and I's because I know my sister is trying to save for college and I already took my student loans out so there's no hope for me to not be thousands of dollars in debt. Of course it helps that my dad paid half my tuition, but still, going to college is expensive. Like Birkin Bag expensive. I could go for a Birkin... how cool would I look?

"Do you think I should buy a Birkin when I'm older and rich?" I say out loud.

The barista looks at me like I'm psycho, and that's the moment I realize my sister has already moved down and is waiting for our drinks. "Um, excuse me?" She questions sounding about as uninterested as she looks. My whole body flushes and I mutter a "sorry" before hurrying over to my sister and laughing awkwardly, telling her what happened.

"It's fine, she probably hears way worse stuff on the daily." She responded with a sympathetic look. She's right, I know she is, but it doesn't stop me from feeling incredibly embarrassed.

"Yeah, I guess."

When our drinks come I suggest we walk down to the water front and sit there instead of in the cafe. I say it's because I want to enjoy the ocean while I'm home, but it's really just so we can get out of the cafe. I'd be lying if I said the whole barista interaction didn't weigh on my mind for a while. I just hate doing embarrassing things and drawing attention to myself. I always blush and start sweating and then I end up stuttering and feeling like crying. Today definitely is not my day, I think.

The water front looks gorgeous this time of year, with a light fog over the water and storm clouds on the horizon. I love this weather, they're something so cozy about it.

"So babycakes, how's life?"

•••

"Honey, I'm home." I yell when Sarah and I walk into the house after grabbing lunch at the marina. My moms car is parked in the laneway so I know she's around here somewhere, otherwise I wouldn't have made that entrance, on account of Mark also living here.

"Kennedy, baby, oh I'm so happy to have you home. How are you? How's school? And work?" Great... all the questions are really gonna lift my spirits, "Any new friends? Or maybe a boyfriend? Do you have a boyfriend?" Her hands are flying all over while she's talking and she keeps touching my hair and face and clothes. "Maybe we could go shopping while you're home. You've had this sweater for so long, you need some new things."

She knows this is a sweater I stole from dad a few years ago. She also happens to know it's my favourite.

"Yeah we can definitely go shopping, I would love that. And no, no boyfriend, no new friends either. But schools going really well and the cafes doing good, I've been working a lot lately and the money's-" I know I've lost her attention when she mutters a "that's too bad" and turns towards the kitchen. I don't let the hurt show on my face, there's no need to sour my sisters mood or make my mom feel bad about it.

"Oh, hello there Kennedy." I hear a male voice from the kitchen and look up to see Mark standing in the doorway grinning. He's about 10 years older than my mom, making him 55 ish. With balding grey hair and a face wrinkled with age I wonder how he got my mom. He's not ugly, but my mom is just so beautiful. He must be a great guy on the inside.

"Hi Mark, how are you?" He doesn't reply, instead approaching me and opening his arms for a hug. I don't necessarily feel like we're at the hugging stage but I do return it so I don't hurt his feelings. His hold is tight and it lasts a little too long, but I brush it off. I'm just uncomfortable because I don't know him that well.

"I'm great darling, how about you? Seattle treating you good?"

"Yeah, its great." I reply with as much excitement as I can muster.

In all honesty I don't love Seattle. Actually that's a lie. I do love Seattle, I just don't love my life there. I'm lonely, and I don't know how to fix it. But in just over a year and a half I'll be graduating and Sarah will be moving in with me and life will be perfect.