Red vs Blue Short Stories/OneShots

Suck It Green Boi (Reader Insert)

Short story I got an idea for when rereading some of my old stories. I stream now so consider checking me out on there! Link on my profile. Enjoy!

:)

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Pulling on my armor, I sighed.

It's been awhile since I last wore this hunk of junk. I've been living the life I've always dreamed of when we finally left that canyon.

But, I had to return to my band of idiots to assist Agent Washington. They were waiting for me as I got ready.

What I didn't realize was that my armor had turned from its beautiful blue to a green color. Very close to a lime green, if I had to guess.

Coming outside, I'm met with Wash, Caboose, and Church. And Caboose cocked his head in confusion.

"Who is that? I thought we were getting Y/n? Did you take them away while they were changing?!" He asked in surprise.

"I am Y/n, you idiot. My suit is just a different color now." I responded.

"How'd it turn green though? Haven't you worn it since being relocated?" Washington asked.

"If I'm gonna be honest, I haven't. I've been living in paradise here. Sometimes, I have realistic dreams that I'm someone else." I admitted.

"Are you okay? Is this really our Y/n in this suit? Or is the green getting to you?" Church jokes.

"I will bitch slap the fuck out of you. Hitspitspackle the fuck out of the next person who makes fun of me and my now green suit." I threatened.

A couple of days later, we were at these bases and Wash finally learns that Church was a motherfucking ghost. And he has yet to pay me my $10 since Tucker did in fact fuck an alien and fuck up with a sniper rifle.

But when the Reds appeared, I knew that they were going to berate me about my suit.

"Hey dirtbags, who's the green bastard with ya?" Sarge hollered.

"Do they even have a home base? I'd be embarrassed for them if I wasn't laughing at their misery." Grif commented.

"Fuck you Reds. I'm the smart Blue from the fucking canyon. And I have a house. But it's far from here." I growled.

"Hey Green. Hey Green. Simmons can show you up in a nerd contest. Suck it!" Grif shouted.

"Suck it Reds." I muttered.

"No. Suck it green boi!" Simmons yelled at the top of his lungs.

"This is not a contest to see who it fucking louder idiots." Church groaned.

"Suck it Green Boi. I like it." Caboose chuckled.