oc rater [warrior cats]

driftberry

name || Driftberry
name reasoning || The prefix 'Drift' is for how he was found on a piece of driftwood. The suffix 'berry' is for his small size.
i love this!! driftberry is such a pretty name, and the name reasoning's great!

[1/1]

gender || Tom
oki!

rank || Defender. The fifth highest rank. Defender's will only fight against other's while Hunters hunt and do patrols. A Hunter must fight a Defender to become one.
interesting!!

clan || Talonclan. A clan in a pine forest area with a creek running through the middle of camp. They are named for the many eagles on their territory, and their ancestors are rogues.
talonclan sounds like a very nice fanclan!

appearance || Driftberry is a classic silver tabby with soft blue eyes. He has a white underbelly and paws, also a bit on his muzzle too. His fur is rather long and tangled but he grooms it. Driftberry's ears are rather small and noticeable along with his huge plump paws. He has a plumped tail covered in dirt all the time.
driftberry sounds very, very beautiful!! the only thing i have with this is that i believe tabbies normally have shorter fur rather than long. but, of course, it is possible! but, i think that if that's the case, his paws won't be too big, or at least not noticeably big, and his ears wouldn't be too small. but those are just small suggestions, as driftberry sounds wonderful!

[1.5/2]

personality || Driftberry is very optimistic even when he knows things won't be OK, which cat's find a bit stupid. He is a big time introvert. Driftberry often gets anxious around other cats which leads to paranoia quickly. This young Tom doesn't speak much even when he has amazing ideas that could really help the clan out. He follows his heart with every paw-step as long as it follows inside the code. He is good at conversation, normally kind and soft with a knack of humor.
very nice!! his personality seems well-balanced out, with a good amount of flaws and good traits. the only suggestion i have is that some of his traits contradict. for example, he's very optimistic reminds me of an outgoing cat who encourages others when they're down (especially since some cats find it stupid, meaning that he must've shared this trait quite often), yet doesn't speak even when he has good ideas. or how he's anxious around other cats yet is good at conversation. stuff like that. but otherwise, it's very good!

[3/4]

backstory || Driftkit never really knew his real mother that well at all. This young Tom was found on a piece of drift wood that floated into Talonclan camp, bringing panic and confusion to them all. He was nursed by a queen named Sagebright; a tall calico she-cat with gentle yellow-green eyes and rather sharp claws. She had given birth to Gingerkit and Floatkit whom treated their younger adopted brother with hostility at first but then warmed up to him quickly.
interesting! after reading through the entire backstory, i believe that the reason of his mother leaving him and setting him off on a piece of wood isn't revealed. i understand that if you're writing a book with him, or something along those lines, and is planning for that to be revealed later on and can't spoil! but nonetheless, a reason would still be important to have in mind!

Driftkit spent his kithood pondering about who his real mother was and why she left him. This is was brought anxiety. After moons of playing with his new littermates and collecting small insects it was time for their apprenticeship. Driftkit earned the name Driftpath (The suffix 'path' is the apprentice suffix for the long journey to becoming a hunter) and given to a young cat named Fallenrun who never mentored before. Fallenrun would teach Driftpath about tracking and how to find the best prey, but neglected fighting which was needed if a cat was to become a Defender. Gingerpath and Floatpath both tried hard to teach their younger brother fighting but neither of them had the skill to do it. Driftpath hunted and helped his clan for moons until he reached 18 moons. His Hunter ceremony. He chose the name Driftberry for his small size. Gingerpath chose Gingerflick for how she always flicked prey away when she didn't want it (odd I know), and Floatpath chose Floatheart for his love of Talonclan. Driftberry began to teach himself on how to fight. He was no where to being good at first but soon adapted to it and could throw a 15 moon cat across the ground in a few good shots. He challenged his mentor Fallenrun to prove he could fight, and his young mentor lost terribly.
cool! i like that you added he was no where to being good at the beginning, to show the development.

however, it does seem a tad unrealistic that he's able to adapt all by himself, since he's never had any of the basis for this and was trained as a hunter. did he have any help at all? did he watch other cats fight and learn that way? something like that! i think that'd help, especially since fallenrun lost terribly.

but let me know if i'm just understanding something wrong!

Driftberry soon started having feelings for a she-cat named Oddmist, and the two became mates shortly after. They had one litter of beautiful kits who they named Polarkit, Darkkit, and Archkit. Driftberry lived the rest of his life happy and thoughtful, fighting battles and solving problems am He among others. He never lost hope in his clan even when his own mate Oddmist k!lled his adopted mother Sagebright.
ooo, little bit of a plot twist! but why did sagebright kill oddmist? was she evil, did she go crazy? did her and oddmist have a rivalry of some sort? what happened?

After moons, Driftberry sadly died by suffocating in snow. His body is buried beside the creek where he was found.
interesting backstory!! i think that the basis is there and good, just needs a little bit of touching up!

[1/2]

family || Mother: Unknown loner
Adopted mother: Sagebright - a tall calico she-cat with soft yellow-green eyes and rather sharp claws. She has short fur that is very patchy and a ripped left ear. (dead)
Father: Unknown loner
Adopted father: Greenfern - a huge black Tom with a patch of white on his chest and narrowed amber eyes. He neglects his kits and mate. (dead)
Brothers: Gingerflick - a huge black Tom with a white patch on his chest and narrowed amber eyes. He has no tail due to a battle. (alive)
Floatheart - a huge black Tom with a white patch on his chest and narrowed amber eyes. (alive)
Mate: Oddwind - a skinny black tabby She-cat with patches of white on her face and legs and thoughtful olive green eyes. (alive)
she sounds so pretty!! curious, though, is her name oddwind or oddmist? this has nothing much to do with the ratings, though!

Kits: Polarpath - a classic silver tabby Tom with soft blue eyes. He has a white underbelly and paws, a bit on his muzzle too. He has a long scar down his throat from a accident as a kit. (dead)
Darkmist - a classic silver tabby Tom with soft blue eyes. He has a white underbelly and paws, a bit on his muzzle too. (alive)
Arch - a classic silver tabby Tom with soft blue eyes. He has a white underbelly and paws, a bit on his muzzle too. He became a rogue after Polarpath passed.
interesting. all of driftberry's kits seem to be pretty much identical in basic appearances, along with having little to none of their mother's appearances. let me know if i'm wrong, but it's my understanding that it's easier for a cat to have darker fur rather than light. i'd suggest for you to change up their appearances a little, but other than that, looks good!

[0.5/1]

final rating || 7/10 [no bonus]

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driftberry's a pretty lovely oc!! he's very unique! i'd just suggest for you to do some tweaks here and there, but other than that, it's good! also, let me know if i misunderstood something!!

thanks for submitting & letting me rate him! <3