Jinxes and curses

Chapter 10; Fucked up

Lily's POV

I found out the seventh- year was Regulus' cousin. I also found out I'd missed Sirius' birthday. I also found out that was why the other two boys had been so absent. And I also found out they hadn't forgotten about us yet. The harsh way.

Christmas was right around the corner. I'd picked up studying backfiring spells and protective charms again, for my own sake. Remus' full moon was tonight and he was pissed off as it was.

I hobbled after him, carrying both me and his books, even though he insisted he didn't need them. Whenever the full moon was around, school seemed like the least important thing in his life. I tried to talk sense into him, but he's as stubborn as one can be.

Our next class was history, and thank god it was also our last. Thank god a little less about the fact that it's with the Gryffindors. I can barely remember the last time I've been jinxed properly by the three boys.

I warned Remus not to annoy them and to not react aggressively when they did anything. Idiotic attempt. That was never gonna happen.

I didn't know wether there was anything greater, but if there was some kind of god, this was the perfect moment to help.

Professor Binns started to read in his abnormally boring voice, even for me, and I took my own book to make notes from there on out. I kept glancing to the side, to Remus. Sev, sitting on my other side, pinched me.

"What're you so worried for?" He asked. I shrugged and continued my notes- making. I tried to make it more discreet now.

I was aware of basically all the three boys, plus Remus, plus Severus, plus Regulus, standing outside our classroom, looking through the window.

It seemed those three nasty Gryffindors weren't feeling like jinxing us today. I left the classroom as fast as I could, leaving Severus and Remus to carry his own bags. Immediately outside the classroom, I put my arm around Regulus shoulder and manoeuvred my way up to an empty corridor.

"Why have you been standing there for a good half an hour?" I was pretty pissed off, and, to my own personal opinion, I had every right to.

Regulus shot a rude glance at me but simply shrugged. I had the urge to hex him, right then and there.

"Now, I have plenty homework to get working on, so you either start talking," I emphasised the word fiercely, "or you're wasting my time and I'm leaving."

Honestly, I didn't actually give him the chance to talk, I just assumed he wasn't gonna do that anyways. I had already turned around. Still, somewhere in the back of my head I hoped Regulus would stop me. Lost hope, because he didn't.

I walked to the library, but as I stood there, I felt completely hopeless and felt I wasn't gonna do any work. Mary and Marlene walked in right when I was leaving. "Aren't you studying with us today?"

The past couple weeks I had been found in the library hanging with the two M's everyday. Remus sometimes joined, Severus only looked at me disgustingly from a distance.

"Not feeling it." Mary put both her hands on my shoulders and said: "That's okay, perhaps we'll see you tomorrow, then. Take your time."

I smiled and felt a comforting warmth when she said that. Nevertheless, I still left the library for my dorm.

I fully ignored Remus as I walked past him. I didn't even notice Regulus when I had already passed him. In my dorm, I sat down on my bed, closed the curtains and fell asleep crying, fully clothed still.

When I awoke the next morning, I realised I'd completely lost myself yesterday. I had finally gotten Regulus to talk to me for once, but ruined it. Remus had to go through this full moon all alone, and god knows what Severus had been wanting from me this time.

I rushed to the hospital wing, only halfway realising I was still wearing my pyjamas. Not that it stopped me, I kept running.

Before the doors of the hospital wing, I was out of breath completely. As I was about to push the door, Madame Pomfrey opened the door and stuck her head through.

"You really can't come in!" She gasped. She looked rather sweaty. "Oh, poor boy, he's had his roughest night yet. Now, excuse me, I'll be going back to him." I put my hand out, ready to say "stop", but she slammed the door in my face. Awesome.

I tried to get back to the common room. What I hadn't realized is that soon would the quidditch season start again and this there were trials for the Gryffindor team. They needed a chaser, and a beater. I think.

I stood for a moment in the great hall, still dressed in pyjamas. I did an attempt to leave unnoticed. I couldn't even hear myself. Of course, this genius plan completely failed.

One of the guys spot me and pinched his neighbour. Soon they were all staring. I dumped my head in my hands to hide my red face. I felt them getting wet from my tears.

God damn it.
Fuck it all.
Fuck them.
I hate this school.
I hate everything.

I ran to the doors of the great hall, but not before I heard a very distinct voice, saying: "Guys, don't laugh at Lily!" Though I did hear him laugh harder even, later. I wanted to shout and to cry out.

Just then, I bumped into Severus. "Lily?" He questioned. I squashed my face in his chest and continued crying. I felt his hands on my head as he comforted me. Then he took me to the common room, jinxing whoever got in my way.

"Thank, Sev." Without another word, he left yet again.