Steve rogers x y/n

chapter 36- humanity

Y/n's pov

I heard the door open. My eyes were still closed as I sat leaning against the hard glass. 

"I know you're not asleep." I heard Loki's familiar voice. "I just want to talk."

I groaned, opening my eyes as I pulled myself to stand. "What do you want?" I questioned, sitting on the attached bench. 

"I just want to know how I can help." I scoffed at his offer. "You can't help. I don't care. I don't care that I'm not hungry. I don't care that I just want to sleep. I DON'T CARE ABOUT FINDING STEVE!!" 

Loki's eyebrows raised in surprise before his lips curved up in a small smirk, "Wow. That was a good act. Maybe you should've been an actor instead of an avenger."

"I'm not a fucking avenger!!" I snapped, banging the glass wall for the probably millionth time. "I'm not an avenger! I'm not a hero! I'm not a fucking prisoner so LET ME OUT!!"

"You know I said the same thing at one point. Then, of course, after I was let out, I stabbed someone. So don't blame me if I'm a little iffy on that one."

"Does it look like I care?" 

"No, It doesn't, but you've said that a million times, so maybe try and roll with something else." I huffed at Loki's annoying responses, pacing back and forth slowly. "You know I wouldn't take you for a coward, Laufeyson."

"And how am I a coward?"

"Well, you couldn't save yourself from hating yourself after you learned your lineage. Then you couldn't save your mom. So then you faked your death for the like millionth time, and then you were forced to live here with a bunch of freaks, lowering already shitty confidence you've had in yourself ever since Thor was your brother as a child."

Loki's left eye twitched slightly. Signaling he was mad. But of course, he didn't show it. "What? Not going to say anything?"

"Not when you're acting like a child."

"I'M NOT ACTING LIKE A CHILD! JUST LET ME OUT!!"

"I can't do that y/n. I would if I didn't think there was something wrong with you. But we need answers on why you're acting like this."

"You want to know why I'm acting like this?!" Loki nodded, stepping a little further from the cell. "I'm acting like this because..." I put on a sorrowed expression, lowering my head as I pretended to cry. Then, finally, I lifted my head, laughing, "I just don't give a single fuck."

 Loki's genuinely disturbed expression fueled me more as I continued to chuckle as he left, locking the door behind him. 

Loki's pov

I knew something wasn't right. So considered I had only known y/n for a short amount of time. I knew she wouldn't act like that. Not when the love of her life was missing. Not when everyone was so visibly worried. 

"Did anyone else see that?" I questioned, walking into Stark's lab. They all nodded, gesturing to the security footage recording y/n's cell. 

"That's not Y/n.." Wanda held back a sob, "That's not our little sister." I placed a comforting hand on her shoulder as she cried into Pietro's side. Vision was still out scouting some known HYDRA bases in Russia, hoping to find a match. Unfortunately, so far, the searches weren't panning out. 

Bucky sat with Natasha in the corner, whispering back and forth in Russian. We all were watching Tony work on something he had called us all in here for. We still don't know what. 

"Okay..." Tony clapped his hands, gaining everyone's attention. "We still don't have Steve's location, but we're looking. Vision may be in the right lane with the idea he's not in Russia. We have all available agents looking across the globe, but...I may know why Y/n is acting like this."

"What's wrong then?" Pietro asked, holding onto Wanda's shoulders tighter. Tony walked over to a transparent screen, pressing his finger to the scanner as a whole chart came up. "Now I made this chart to help explain to non-genius's like you guys understand the complex-"

"Get on with it, Stark." Natasha interrupted, earning a roll of the eyes from the billionaire. 

"This is where her mental status was when she first came here." Next, he pointed to the lower bar. "This is where it was before HYDRA took her again." Then, he pointed to an even higher bar. Meaning she was happy.

"The bar kept going up and up until it dropped. That's now." Tony pointed to the lowest bar. Even lower from the time she first came. 

"I don't understand? She's just not happy?" Bucky question. "Cause I think we all noticed that. She's pissed as fu-"

"It's not just that she's not happy." Tony turned off the screen. "Her mindset when she was with HYDRA is completely different from when she's with us." He sighed, "Let me explain it this way. There's HYDRA Y/n that doesn't remember anything but how to kill and to listen to the person who activated her." 

Tony held up his other hand, "Then there's our Y/n. She remembers her past. She knows her siblings. She knows James, and she knows Steve." Tony dropped his hands, "But this Y/n..." He looked at the security footage again, seeing her smirk right into the camera with glowing eyes. 

"When she lost Steve, it was like everything bad that's ever happened to her exploded in her mind. Leaving everything she cares about to waste. This Y/n is the one worse than HYDRA. She doesn't have orders. No mission to kill. No person to tell her what to do. She doesn't have love or kindness. She has hate, and she doesn't care. She doesn't have humanity. And I don't know if..."

We all looked at the screen after hearing what Tony had to say. Y/n was staring right at us. Her hand was glowing. And with the flick of her wrist, the security camera was smashed, leaving the footage to static out. 

"I don't know if we can get it back."