Ava knows who Jimmy O'Brien is - her first love and soulmate. Forced to spend time apart, Ava and Jim deal with their trust issues and insecurities.
When the lovers finally reunite and resolve to fight for each other, their fragile happiness is put...
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We'd travel to Spain the following day. The tickets were booked, the suitcases made, but there was no excitement about the trip. Ava went through the motions on autopilot, acting as if everything was okay. We showered together and went to bed early, although I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep.
Guilt kept me awake. I nearly drowned in it when I chose to hide my true identity from Ava, and now I was lying again.
My biggest fear was that she’d get excited to meet her mom only to have her hopes crushed and her heart broken. By saying nothing, I'd allow her to get hurt.
It was two a.m., and I continued thinking about Alan's confession. Did he expect me to be the brave one and tell Ava the ugly truth? That he put the ball in my court solved nothing because I hated the idea of causing her pain as much as he did.
I sighed and reached for my phone, but before I could grip it, a sniffling noise beside me made my heart skip a beat.
How long had she been awake? Did she sleep at all?
I wrapped an arm around Ava’s waist. “Baby,” I whispered into her hair, “are you okay?”
Ava shook her head, and it was all it took for me to bring her to my chest. I kissed her tear-stained cheeks and ran a hand over her back.
“I got you, okay? It’s going to be alright.”
“I’m just so hurt,” Ava said. “Why did he lie to me? Why does everyone always lie to me?”
By everyone, she probably meant me. And I couldn’t do it again even though the alternative scared the shit out of me.
Since Harper said nothing, Ava thought I returned home from Alfie’s and didn’t suspect a thing. “I talked to your dad today,” I said.
She looked up at me. “You did?”
“Yeah.” I pressed my lips to her forehead. “And I want to tell you what he told me because you deserve to know the truth before we travel.”
Ava nodded. “I need to know. A part of me thought he kept me from meeting my mother on purpose, but my dad isn’t selfish. It just doesn’t make sense. Even if they decided to split up, she could’ve called or visited, right? So, I thought it was bad. It’s bad, Jimmy, isn’t it?”
I took a deep breath and kissed her softly before telling her everything. I didn’t use the exact words Alan did. I couldn’t bring myself to tell Ava her mother didn’t want to hold her when she was born and never called her by her name. It was always those small details that stuck with us. She’d probably forget the big things, but the tiny ones? Those would haunt her, and she deserved better.
Although I kept those tiny things from her, Ava’s body shook with sobs as soon as I stopped speaking.
“If you prefer not to travel, we won’t,” I said almost an hour later when she finally calmed down. “Don’t worry about the tickets.”
