HURRICANE

C

BUT THE SKY IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL RIGHT NOW

AND I KNOW THAT I AM OFTEN SAD

BUT THERE ARE MOMENTS WHEN

I FALL IN LOVE WITH THE WORLD AND

I ADORE ALL THE OXYGEN INSIDE MY LUNGS

AND I'M NOT SCARED ANYMORE.

.

those three days were the hardest of my life. 

all i wanted to see was him. 

when liam told me he had lived, 

that he was alive. i had never been happier. 

i hugged liam like a lifeline. 

they had called after i left. 

and thank god he wasn't too late like 

i

was.

i go alone, upon request. 

they understand, they know that

i feel stronger than they do. 

i tell them his name, my heart racing

and they give me a room number.

i almost run to him.

my

heart

aches.

when i reach his room i can see

him in his bed.

he's awake and looking around. 

i close my eyes and try and hold in the tears.

he is alive

he is alive

i step into the room,

and he looks at me, gaze softening.

"i am so sor-"

"i know you are, louis."

i step closer to his bed, and climb

in with him

whispering sweet things

into his hair.

i hold him close to me,

small and frail,

the room is white

and so so cold

and the air is stale and thick

like you can barely breathe.

we stay like this 

for

hours.

"let's get you out of here."

i finally whisper to him,

and he nods quietly.

i stroke his cheek with my fingertips

and go to the doctors. 

they say i shouldn't

because of the suicide attempt

but i shake my head.

"i'll protect him."

they shake their head

at me but let me go.