THE FEAR OF BECOMING
WHAT YOU USED TO BE
.
niall has little to say,
as he holds me.
and there isn't anything to say.
the way his lips curve downward
into a frown, i simply know that he knows.
HOW CAN THEY KNOW ME
I AM A CLOSED DOOR.
I AM A STICK OF DYNAMITE BURNING AT BOTH ENDS.
ALL I WAIT FOR IS FOR THE SKY TO FALL
ON TOP OF
MY BACK
WHERE THE REST OF THE UNIVERSE RESTS.
this vulnerability that i have found myself
dealing with is making me feel again,
making me feel things that i shouldn't.
i shouldn't be allowed to love,
i do not deserve it.
haley.
haley.
haley.
her voice reverberates through my skull
and the entire world seems to shake.
ah ah ah,
you thought you could escape me?
no, little girl,
put on your skirt
and take your pills!
no food for this little missy today,
have to get your figure to what it needs to be!!
and suddenly i am screaming.
s c r e a m i n g.
the mirrors that surrounded
my self image
shattered.
i am no longer looking at myself.
all of the walls
breaking down.
vision is black,
voice is starting to raw out.
when
will
i
stop
screaming?
my body is numb,
my fingertips,
though,
feel
like
they
are
on
fire.
the light seems closer than ever,
but how will i ever reach it.
shatter me
shatter my self doubt
shatter my longing to be with someone.
put the shards of glass through my heart so
i can get the heartbreak over with.
let me die.
oh mother,
pay me attention,
but just let me die.
YOU ARE READING
HURRICANE
Fanfiction[ larry; completed ] he was just a hurricane of self destruction, troubled by the ghosts of his past, devoid of the color that he once possessed. yet he lives on, walking with the universe on his shoulders...
