sapphire || fred weasley

fifty-three

Triggering content, viewer discretion advised.

September, 2001

Four months had gone by since the battle.

Four months had gone by since Fred last saw Beatrice.

Four months had gone by since her screams filled his nightmares.

Fred was consumed by guilt. There was no other way of describing it.

He was sick of it all.

Of the war.

Of being in charge of planning battle strategies and carry them over on in the field.

He was sick of watching people he knew die in front of his eyes by the hand of a death eater.

He was sick of fighting.

But he knew that if he didn't, things would go even more downhill than they already were. He only kept going to keep his mind busy. If he simply let go, he knew that Beatrice and Lee, his mother and Percy would haunt him outside the nightmares. During every waking moment.

Guilt was eating him alive.

Grief had become a flesh eating parasite in him. Destroying him from the inside out.

He couldn't save Lee.

He couldn't save Percy.

He couldn't save his mum.

He didn't protect Beatrice the way he had promised to Mr Ollivander on his death bed.

Fred could still hear her voice. Everywhere.

Bea was everywhere he went. Always in the back of his head like a guardian angel. Warning him. Protecting him.

Reminding, that she needed his help. More now than ever.

The war still raged on.

The Order, mainly led by former Gryffindors refused to surrender. They were all willing to give everything they had left in them to obtain the victory in the end. To make the countless deaths so far not let be in vain.

Some have given up, some hadn't.

The only reason why Fred hadn't given up yet, was because of the sole fact that Beatrice was still out there. Helpless and vulnerable and alone.

The reminder of her. Blue eyes like bright sapphires. Delicately sharp features like the marble statue of a Greek goddess. The smile that became the only thing that could revive his lifeless heart.

He needed her.

He needed her back.

Fred didn't know how much he would be able to hold on without her.

Everyone around him knew that Fred was hanging by a thin thread. They knew that he was slowly drowing. Slowly dying. The oxygen leaving his lungs more and more as the days passed.

Beatrice was that oxygen his lungs desperately craved.

Beatrice was that blood his heart was running out of supply from.

His body may have been perfectly fine, but that didn't take from the fact that his mind was dying without her.

That's why when Remus asked him to become a general he didn't think twice before accepting. It was all because of her.

Because he knew that being in a higher rank, meant that he had access to confidential and useful information that could potentially help him find her.