sapphire || fred weasley

sixty-seven

March, 2004

The war still raged on after almost five years of it.

And with Medusa crumbling down the Order's frontline of defense with simple flicks of her wand every time while on the battle field, hope was starting to vanish among their ranks.

Every plan Fred came up with, was crushed under Medusa's fist.

Every strategy he came up with, was set quickly on fire the moment she showed up like a deadly angel with a dark halo floating above her head.

Every single death from their side, he added to his own personal list. He felt that in a way, he was the one responsible for them. Responsible for them all.

That his ruined battle strategies had sent them towards their inevitable doom.

And even though he may have been responsible for the failed plans, she was the one who had pulled the trigger.

She was the one casting avadas without sparing a single second to look who she was killing. She just did it mechanically, like a robot from the futuristic muggle films he and George used to watch with their siblings when they were younger.

But one thing that always intensified Fred's guilt, was the fact that while he was safe and protected in Grimmauld Place, others were dying and being wounded in the field.

His friends and his family. People he went to school with and knew.

They were all out there in the defense lines, doing their very best to try and even out their end of the war with their life's at risk while he was safe and sound with Juliet by his side.

He felt that he wasn't doing enough. That there was more he could be helping with.

That the torturing and the information were not enough at that point.

And he wanted to be out there, doing something for the greater good even if his sins would never be forgiven if they won. He knew he had already earned his one way ticket to hell. He had made his peace with it already.

But Fred was absolutely terrified of leaving Juliet. It was the type of fear that made his heart rate speed up and his body drench in cold sweat.

Because the little redhead girl wasn't the only one with clear attachment issues.

And leaving Juliet wasn't what scared him the most.

What scared the living shit out of him, was leaving and not returning back to her.

It was imagining her confused little face as she waited for him to come back. As she waited and waited and waited, only to realize that he wouldn't.

Only to realize that she was alone. That he had left her alone.

Fred could never bring himself to leave Juliet.

Having her grow up without him, all by herself, was in fact his biggest fear.

Because despite knowing that she would still have a loving and caring family, he also knew that not child deserved to grow up without their parents.

And Juliet had already lost a half of them. She only had him left.

But the war was becoming bigger than any of them, and he could tell that George was starting to notice his deepest desire.

Of being out in middle of it all. Of being out there, hurting those who had hurt and taken his wife away from him.

But Medusa was the one who drew him in the most.

And he wanted to be the one who caught her. Who dragged her by the hair to the lion's den.