euphoric

seventeen

downtown brooklyn
omniscient

(TRIGGER WARNING)

kasani threw his head back as his breath hitched.

here he was, trying to hold back tears as he reminisced.

a month after endya telling him that he shouldn't let his depression get to him and that he wasn't alone, here he was, letting it get to him.

he rubbed his thumb across a tattoo that was slightly hidden. he didn't want to be reminded of the horrific event everyday but he wanted an everlasting memory of his best friend.

the tattoo read pryce in bold cursive letters with his birth and death date under.

feburary 8th, the day he hated the most.

the memory continued to play in his head back to back..sleep was nowhere in sight for him.

two years..two years since his best friend left him.

their bond is what makes this day harder for kasani. pryce and kasani were brothers. you would've thought the pair came out of the same womb by how close they were.

as his depression begins to take over, he turns to the one person that always answers his calls, endya.

"please pick up endya," he mumbles to himself.

"yes sani," endya groaned into the phone being that she was almost asleep.

"i need you mama," his voice cracked.

"what's wrong pa?"

"just p-please come over, " he pleaded.

endya tossed on the first pair of leggings and hoodie that she could find and made her way to kasani's house.

she used her key that he recently gave her and made her way to his room.

kasani was on his bed buried under covers. every few seconds you could hear him gasp.

"baby," she pulled the covers off of him "what's wrong pa? why you crying?"

endya got under the covers with him and pulled him close to her.

"i can't do this shit no more endya. i'm trying for y'all but i can't mama i can't do it." he broke down as soon as his head hit her chest.

he knew that she was here for him because for some reason, he just couldn't get it through his head. he didn't want to seem selfish but he couldn't cope with the pain, he wanted to be numb.

"i'm sorry baby but you gotta stay strong. i'm here for you. what do you need?" she rubbed up and down his back.

"i don't know. it's just a constant memory of what i've been through flashing through my head every day." kasani sobbed.

endya didn't really know what to say in these predicaments. she knew she couldn't really laugh or make a joke because he needs her right now. he trusts her to let her see him in his most vulnerable state.