x › my heart has lost its warmth from regret after regret.

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lots of dialogue this chapter <3

hyunjin's teeth clacked together violently as he stepped out of the train station and into the snow

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hyunjin's teeth clacked together violently as he stepped out of the train station and into the snow.

he congratulated himself for having, for once, the hindsight to wear his thick boots that he reserved for the snow. now his feet were only freezing, and the snow didn't sink into his socks to leave them wet and gross.

however, because of the snow, hyunjin was forced to swing the duffle bag that contained his art supplies over onto his shoulder so that he could carry his actual luggage.

he was exhausted and sore after sitting in the same seat for the entire train ride, which had been a total of three hours.

the handles of his luggage kept slipping from his gloved hands. hyunjin was thoroughly frustrated.

he waddled with great effort while holding the luggage, his stomach grumbled violently as he smelled the familiar savory scents of the small diner situated outside the train station.

jisung used to work there; who knew if he still did?

hyunjin quickly scrambled over to the diner, hoping to make it before the crowd that had gotten off the train with him.

the bell jingled on the door frame as he opened it curiously, looking around the diner.

the atmosphere hadn't changed a bit. it was warm and cozy in there, and christmas music played softly from the speakers installed around on the ceiling.

the smell of cooking food swarmed him, enveloping him in an inviting environment. there was the sound of clinking glasses and the swell of multiple conversations.

"hey! look who it is!"

hyunjin snapped out of his reprieve and was shocked to see a familiar face standing behind the counter, wearing a bright red apron and a name tag.

not jisung.

it was jeongin, the tiny boy who lived next door to his parents' house.

hyunjin tried for a smile in greeting, recalling the various moments in his childhood when he had suffered the many pranks jeongin had liked to pull on him after finding out that hyunjin got scared easily.

jeongin crossed his arms across his chest. he had grown considerably since hyunjin left, though he was still shorter than him. "what brings you here? you visiting your parents?"

"mhm." hyunjin stepped closer, having a feeling that something was different about jeongin. he tapped his chin and then gasped, "you got your braces off!"

jeongin nodded happily. "yup, i finally did. now i actually look like an adult, and not some awkward preteen."

"you're still awkward though.."

"oh, yeah, i know." the black-haired boy laughed and headed over to the register to take hyunjin's order.

it seemed like a lifetime before the he fortuitously arrived at his parents' doorstep, practicing his "happy" face for them.

the door flung open, and with a dramatic flourish, his dad appeared, and announced with a booming voice, "sam is here!!" he threw his arms around hyunjin in a tight bear hug. complaining, he frowned, "i forgot how tall you are! did you grow even more since you left?!"

they entered the house then, and hyunjin set down his luggage beside the door, teeth clenching together while he tried his hardest not to make faces at the christmas tree set up in the living room.

he said hello to his mom, who was situated in the living room, seemingly in the middle of ordering something online on her laptop.

they made him sit down and recant to them every single detail of his life away from home and in the art program.

of course, hyunjin knew they'd be disappointed to know the actual truth, so he fibbed quite a bit and made up stories for them.

the program became fun and a space to let out his creativity instead of narrowing his vision and stressing him out.

the apartment he'd managed to obtain on such short notice was small but cozy, instead of suffering from the overcrowding from hyunjin's art supplies and lack of a heater.

and instead of only having chris and felix as friends, hyunjin suddenly had an entire group of them; he recalled their names from felix's holiday party.

hyunjin's mom clapped eagerly. "ah, so you and seungmin became friends at the program!! his mom will be very glad to know he came out of his shell and has someone from home there with him!"

with a slow nod at her words, hyunjin recalled the awkwardness of traveling from home to the city where the university and its art program was instituted; the entire train ride, he and seungmin had hardly exchanged a word, having been forced to travel together by their mothers, who were best friends.

he breathed a sigh of relief once he was allowed to go and unpack.

dropping his luggage beside the door, he shut it tightly and emptied out his art supply bag onto the floor, unfurling chris' painting.

before settling down to paint, however, hyunjin reached into his luggage and brought out a box of hair dye, staring intently at it.

yes, he was going to go back to blond, for old memories' sake.

hyunjin ran to the bathroom and began setting up the tools around the sink, staring into the mirror. his eyes were bright, and his hair had grown long enough to frame his face perfectly.

it had been a long time since hyunjin had stared into a mirror and not seen an empty shell of a person staring back.

this was a longer chapter than usual, wow

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this was a longer chapter than usual, wow.
nearly 1k???

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