Reverse operation // Thiam

Old friend

"Scott?" Isaac said knocking on Scott's door. Me and Liam were listening in on them both.

"Hey." Scott breathed.

"Look I'm sorry about brunch running over. It kinda slipped our minds if you know what I mean?" I heard Scott's heart rate increase, like he was upset.

"I'm sorry that was a stupid thing to say." Isaac obviously heard it too.

"No it's fine. It's none of my business. Don't worry about it." Scott went to shut the door but Isaac put his hand out.

"I know Scott." Isaac said.

"W-what are you on about?" Scott stuttered.

"Theo told me." I cursed. I was hoping Isaac wouldn't say anything.

"Told you what?" I could hear the pain in Scott's voice.

"Scott..." I heard scuffling and then a loud knock at my door.

"Hey Scott!" I said opening the door slightly. I could see the tears forming in his eyes.

"You promised!"

"I-"

"You don't get it do you? You have someone Theo! You have someone so you think it's all easy to express your feelings! It's not. I can't have a relationship! That's not something that's ever worked out for me. You want people to trust you? Then don't tell their secrets when they're not yours to tell." Scott walked back into his room slamming the door.

"Scott!" Isaac banged on the door. The door didn't open. "Scott please open the door..." Isaac rested his forehead against it.

The door swung open and Isaac nearly fell inside.

"Don't be mad at Theo. He was just trying to help." Scott scoffed.

"Is that all you had to say? Thanks a lot." He went to shut the door but Isaac stopped him again.

"Scott just tell me. Tell me what you feel." Isaac said desperately. "Please..." Scott looked uncertain for a moment before he finally said it.

"I love you... Isaac." I held my breath hoping for the best. Isaac had to feel the same way. He just had too.

"Scotty..." Isaac breathed cupping Scott's cheek again. "I-"

"Don't." Scott interrupted him and I could see the sadness in his eyes. He sucked in a breath.

"As much as I want to do this with you, and as much as it hurts me to say this... I can't do it. I can't be another fling that once you're satisfied you throw away?"

"T-that's not what this is! I swear!"

"I'm sorry Isaac." Scott moved backwards and Isaac's hand fell to his side.

"Scott?"

"I'm sorry..." he whispered and the door shut. Isaac hit the side of his fist with it and he looked at the floor. I went to close the door but Isaac turned his head to me.

"You. You said he loved me." He said pointing a finger in my face.

"I'm sorry Isaac..." He started to tear up, something I didn't see much. Isaac bit his lip.

"I've just lost Scott..." he said shaking his head. "Because of you!" He shoved me backwards. I went to retaliate but Liam grabbed my arm. I looked back at him and he shook his head.

Isaac gave us one last look before scoffing and going into his room.

"Why did you stop me?" I snapped turning to Liam.

"Theo?" Liam said frowning at me.

"The twat needs some sense knocked into him! Maybe then he wouldn't go around sleeping with every slut he finds!"

"Are you kidding? Isaac just lost his best friend Theo! And the boy that he loves! Have some empathy."

I tugged my arm away from Liam as he was still holding it in his hand. "Piss off."

"Fine. I will!" Liam grabbed his jacket and his rings that he wore and walked out. I didn't follow him but I heard the slam of the front door echo all throughout the house.

I'd have to deal with that at school tomorrow too. Not just Isaac, not just Scott but Liam now too. Great. I swallowed my throat sore. My hands itched for the metal. It was never like this. Never this painful.

I picked up my phone my hands shaking violently. I dialled Liams number and held it to my ear. He declined me.

"Shit!" I left my room knocking on Isaac's.

"Isaac!" There was no response so I went to Scott's.

"Scott please open the door!" I banged but there was no reply. I tried Liam one more time but once again my call was declined. Screw it. Melissa had taken my blade... shit. I ran to the bathroom fumbling around for anything I could use.

Beard trimmer? I fumbled around with the object but is was a dead end. Melissa's razor was a bust too. It hurt so bad. It was like a built up of blood in my veins that needed to be released. If only I could find a damn blade!

I stumbled into Melissa's room looking through her bedside tables. Nothing. Then her chest of drawers. Fuck yes it was there under her socks. What a weird place to keep it. Maybe she thought I wouldn't look in there. I thanked god that she was at work again today.

I made sure it looked like everything was like it was before and headed back to my room. I sunk down my wall hitting my head off the white paint.

I drew the blade across my skin welcoming the feeling like an old friend. I sighed in relief as the pain went away only to be replaced by the numbness.

I half expected the cut to heal over like they always did but like last time they didn't. I smiled faintly in surprise drawing another line with the cool metal. Once again relief flooded my body before disappearing into numbness once again. I made a few more till I was worried about bleeding out again and went back into the bathroom. Melissa had to have some rubbing alcohol somewhere. I found it and used some toilet paper to dab it on it stinging slightly. I left them to scab over or maybe disappear. Who knows?

It was only 2 but I was drained so I rested my head against my pillow my eyes fluttering shut and sleep overcoming me.