Anna and I arrived at the pit, which smelled like alcohol and sweat. We split up because she said she was going to go find Jake. I don't know how she will with this many people. I see the bar isn't too full probably because the pit was literally turned into a huge bar. There is music blasting and every corner you turn there's alcohol. I walked into the bar and see Eric sitting at the counter. He looks like he's had a couple drinks.
"Hey," I said sitting next to him now.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" He asked. Why is he so concerned about me?
"Well this loud music is hurting my head a little bit," I was being honest. This music was super loud but I guess I'll have to get used to it if I want to stay in Dauntless.
"Hmm," I think he was thinking, "Come on," he picked up another beer and motioned for me to follow him. He led me to the chasm and I was a little nervous. He sat down and patted the seat next to him, so I sat down. We were sitting pretty close and I could smell the strong scent of alcohol from his breath.
"You look very nice," he said looking down at the chasm. Did he just say that?
"Thank you," I acknowledged him and smiled. He didn't smile back which wasn't weird cause he never smiles but he had a confused look on which was weird. "What's wrong?" I asked slightly concerned.
"Why are you sitting with me?" He asked.
"What do you mean? You did ask me to follow you." Maybe he was so drunk he couldn't remember.
"No I mean. Nobody just sits next to me. Especially not over the chasm." I thought for a moment searching his eyes. He was being serious now. "Do I not scare you?"
"I believe there's more to you than the ruthless cold hearted monster everyone thinks you are," I really hope he tells me more about him. He sat there, looking confused again.
"See there is where you're wrong." Now I looked at him confused. He looked back at the chasm. "I really am a ruthless cold hearted monster," he stated that like he was trying to convince himself more than me. I put my hand on his shoulder.
"I bet that's not true."
He shook his head again, and finally looked back up at me. He sighed and whispered, "But it is." He looked so sad now.
I looked back down at the chasm. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breathe before saying, "My dad got really drunk one night and killed my mom because he was jealous. He then started beating me telling me he never loved me and neither did my mom. That's why he didn't visit on visiting day." I'd never talked to anyone about this but I wanted him to know I cared. He stared at me so I kept going, "I was never the perfect Amity because I shut everybody out rather than being peaceful and accepted that I needed help. I built up walls but decided that the day I chose Dauntless I would let those walls down. I'm still working on it but at least I'm trying." Now we were staring into each others eyes.
"Why did you tell me that?" He asked.
"Because I went through what your going through. I know what it's like to shut people out and that there's a reason to it. I know you're more than just a strict leader." Wow where was all this motivational speaking coming from? I thought to myself. "I'm not saying let down your walls to the world, just maybe tell someone to get it off your chest." I didn't want to directly say TELL ME because we barely knew each other but if he can tell at least 1 person, it's a great feeling.
"You're right. I wasn't always like this," he looked at the chasm. "During initiation there was this girl who I thought would be the one," he was so cute and vulnerable like this. I'm glad he's telling me, "And I'm pretty sure she felt the same way we just never told each other directly. But one night on the train, all the initiates were there and she went to the back to talk to someone. On her way back to me she was tripped and pushed out the door of the train. I went to reach for her but it was too late. The way it looked to everybody else was that I was holding her arm and let go on purpose, when really this guy that didn't like either of us did it to frame me." He looked back at me now. "Now I have this image people gave me because of that. I shut everybody out since then."
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Eric Lets Go
FanfictionDauntless has created an image for Eric after an incident during his initiation and no one knows the real him nor do they want to know the real him. When it is time for new initiates, he has to overlook their training as part of his leader training...