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Arykaiz struggled with life since her mother left her and her father. At the age of 14 a psychologist told her she has a lot of problems and she is still suffering after 3 years.
When she decides to go to school again she never wanted to...
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Ary's father, his name is Alistair Anyway enjoy 😌
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I let my body fall down against the wall in the back of the school. My body feels numb, my throat is dry and my hands are sweating like crazy. I always had this problem with sweaty hands, when my emotions are too much like I am in an uncomfortable situation or something, they just begin to sweat. I am so embarrassed with this, another thing that keeps me away from people. I don't mind so much talking to someone it's just that I don't really like it and when it comes to physical contact my anxiety is increased. So yea, I don't really do conversation or friendship.
I keep asking myself why do I hate myself so much...
I took my water from my bag and drank a good amount of it. Looks like these mixed emotions consumed a little too much energy from me. I wonder why this boy is always there. Like why is he there when I'm at... my worst. He could have been everywhere else but he happened to be next to me in English class.
I put my water back in my bag and took out a cigarette. I don't smoke much. Just 2 or 3 cigarettes a day
I inhale the toxic smoke and let it leave my lungs after. My father doesn't know I smoke and it's better this way if he finds out I'm screwed.
I finished my cigarette and took my bag from the ground to go to my next class. I turned around the corner and bumped into someone. There are three boys in front of me and one girl. The boy I bumped into has tan skin and black hair with hazel eyes, the other two both have chestnut hair, the difference is their eyes, one of them has blue eyes and the other one has brown eyes. I think they are brothers. They all have well build body and let's not talk about how tall they are compared to my 5.3 feet. They all turned around to face me and then I noticed the blond girl that is giving me a competitive look. She was making out with the blue eyed boy. I can see that her natural hair color isn't blond, but rather brown, the color revealing from the root. I mumbled a "sorry" and started to walk past them. The boy I bumped into spoke up making me stop.
"Hey if you ever come here again we will not let you leave so easy! You don't saw anything! Am I clear?!"
He raised his voice at me and I said yes without turning around and then continued my way to class.
I think that girl is someone well known in this high school and maybe I shouldn't have seen her making out with that boy.
At some point I thought that he will come and help me or something, if things got worse. But in the end he didn't and I didn't got hurt. I should stop thinking about him. He just happened to help me and I already picture him as someone important to me.
Even when I'm at the canteen or on the streets walking home I still hope to see him. I think I just want fate to bring me together with someone. He just showed me kindness and I embraced it too quickly. I let my walls down and now I'm hurting more. This thoughts consume me more and more when I think of him.
Why are you afraid to love?
What is love anyway?
It's a curse. And when you're under a curse it's hard to break it. It just wanders around through your body making you flinch every time you think of it.
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I got home eventually and when I entered the front door my father came in front of me in an instant.
"Zi!!! Guess who came at our house!"
He said full of happiness and then from the kitchen came...... uncle Julien? Wait... UNCLE JULIEN!!!
"Uncle Julien!!!" I screamed and jumped before running in his arms.
Julien is my father's twin brother and the single difference between them is that my uncle unlike my father has blond hair and blue eyes while my father has black hair and brown eyes. He is the only family member that I know and he visits quite often. My father is really close with my uncle and this made me think of Julien like my other father, so I'm really attached to this person.
"Ah my little Bambi!!" He said wrapping his hands around me and hugging me tight. "Hey do you want to see my new car?!" He is a "collection man" and really likes car. Lucky that he has so much money otherwise he will not eat or have a house just to afford so many cars.
"Another one really?" I said rolling my eyes and chuckled.
"The cars always attracts people. I should give you one to impress some boys." He said with a smirk on his face and lead me outside to his car. I instantly looked down embarrassed. He is doing this again. He always tries to hook me up with boys or buying me expensive clothes to impress.
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I spent my evening with my uncle and my dad. Now I'm in my bed exhausted and sleepy. But how can I relax or sleep when my uncle is singing downstairs the melody 'Sorrows'. Yep he's drunk. . . . I woke up from a nightmare in the middle of the night panting and sweating. I jump out of bed trying to control my breathing. Walking around my room I began to massage my temples. I tried to relax and focus on breathing but with no luck. I feel like my body is going to leave me any second. All I can think is the worst. I fell down on my knees trying to breath in. I don't want to make a scene now with my father and uncle at home.
I put a hand on my chest to feel my heart beating. I started to cry and soon my cries became screams. I screamed and screamed like I am insane. The single thing I don't have to do is panic. I tried everything to not do this things and remain calm but I couldn't.
I heard my father footsteps. Last thing I saw was him, screaming my name beforeI fall down into darkness...
