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Warnings:
-Bullying (and body shaming)
-Mentions self harm

George's POV

I was messing with my hoodie's sleeves as I blinked a few times, having two tears roll down my face as I angrily hit my own arm. Clay and Sapnap made me so insecure that I literally hated myself now. I was scared of them, I tried to avoid them as much as I could but they were together with me in most of my classes.

I wiped the tears away as I sniffed softly, lifting my sleeve up to see the cuts on my wrist. I thought I would just make one cut after I didn't self harm in two weeks, but it completely escalated and before I realised my full arm was covered in cuts again.

I was just so hurt by what Clay and Sapnap did to me, not even spoken about all the others who just went along with it, that I tended to cut myself a lot to relieve my pain.

Clay and Sapnap didn't seem to know what they did to me. They had amazing lives and would never know what it was to be in so much pain that self harm was the only way to escape from it.

I rolled my sleeve back down and looked up when I heard someone in the distance running closer to me. It took me a while to realise this was Clay and I stood still abruptly, ready to turn around and run away since I was genuinely terrified of Clay.

He ran up to me which caused me to freeze and forget how to move myself. 'Don't hurt me,' I whispered as he stood next to me.

He smiled shortly. I thought he was going to make fun of me, but his smile didn't seem teasing this time, it seemed sweet and genuine.

'What's up?' he asked as he stood next to me. I wondered why he was also wearing a hoodie since it was pretty hot outside. He used to wear those tight shirts that made it obvious he was muscular or just a normal shirt that I wished to be able to buy.

'Uh-,' I mumbled, not knowing what to say. He could just be joking and then eventually hurt me and make fun of me.

I glanced at him and noticed him limping, it looked like his back was hurting, but I was never going to ask why. He'd just make fun of me for daring to ask him anything.

He looked at me and I shortly stared into his deep, I figured, green eyes. One of his eyes seemed swollen, but as soon as he noticed me looking at his eye he turned his face away and looked at his hands.

It was very uncomfortable between us and we walked in silence as he sighed softly. I noticed him playing with his sleeves as well and then he looked up at me again.

'How uh- are you?' he asked with a very soft voice. I never heard him talk like that, his voice sounded sweet. Almost vulnerable.

'I'm fine,' I lied as I rethought yesterday. I scoffed to myself as I saw myself in my room, crying because of what Clay and Sapnap told me. Now he was walking next to me, asking me if I was fine.

'Mhm, that's good,' he replied softly. 'Did you study for the test today?'

'Not r-really...' I was crying all day while cutting my own skin from sadness.

'Me neither,' he mumbled with a slight chuckle after it. I noticed it wasn't a chuckle because he found it funny, he was hurt.

I looked up at him and saw his eyes were watery. He immediately looked away from me and swallowed as he sniffed softly. 'Allergies, you know?' he whispered.

'Yeah... summer.'

It turned quiet again and I looked at my hands, seeing Clay scratch his skin softly. Was he trying to hurt himself?

'Anyway... I guess I'll go now,' he sighed. 'Bye.'

I nodded slowly and he walked off quickly, leaving me alone again. I was glad he was gone and breathed out, letting the anxiety leave my body again. I slowly walked further in peace, hoping Clay would never come back to me.

~~~

I arrived at school and sighed deeply when I walked inside of it. I looked around me while trying to hide myself and walked to my locker with slow and quiet footsteps. No one was waiting for me this time and I opened the locker, seeing a message in it which already caused me to feel sad.

I grabbed the note and looked at it, reading the text on it in the hope it would be a sweet or kind note for once, but unfortunately...

⚠️ Bullying

If you see this it's a sign you should kill yourself so no one has to look at your gross appearance ever again. Rather today than tomorrow <3 Sapnap :p

⚠️ Over

I bit my lip so I wouldn't start crying and I laid the note down again as I grabbed the books I needed, feeling tears fill my eyes without me being able to control them. One of them dropped down as I closed my locker. I stood in silence for a little and turned around slowly to walk off, bumping into Sapnap and Clay.

'I'm so sorry,' I whispered. 'I didn't see and-.'

⚠️ Bullying (and body shaming)

Clay glared at me and rolled his eyes while Sapnap gagged and pushed me away. 'Please get away from me, I don't like pigs close to me. George, you read my message. You should kill yourself, alright? No one cares about you and no one will ever care about you either.'

I nodded slowly. 'I'm sorry. Can I please go to class now? I don't want to skip and-.'

Sapnap didn't seem done, but Clay nodded. 'Just get away from us, idiot.'

⚠️ Over

I nodded heavily and turned around, running away as fast as I could because I was so scared of them. I turned around three times to make sure they weren't following me because they followed me quite some times before this. They even beat me up a few times after pinning me against the wall with multiple people.

They didn't follow me this time and I went to my first class, sitting down on my chair. Luckily I didn't have class with Clay or Sapnap this hour so I could breathe again.

1073 words

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