sarah paulson one shots

wildest dreams - lana winters

summary: before lana leaves briarcliff, she promises she'll be back for you. After three whole months, she finally makes them release you and now she's there to help with your recovery.

warnings: vomiting, mention of drugs/medicine, mention of abuse, eating disorder. let me know if there's more that i should to add.

word count: 4555

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"Open your eyes, y/n" you woke up to whispering. Quiet pleads and begs for you to just wake up. "Lana?" The room wasn't very bright -matter of fact it was dark with only a dim lamp lighting it- but you still squinted your eyes. Your voice sounded like a truck ran it over a rocky road and it hurt like that too but you pulled through for Lana. By now, she asked countless of times for you to just open your eyes and you wouldn't make her waste her breath any longer.

"Y/n!" she kept her voice low and you wondered how she was beside you without getting caught. That's when you realized, you were still in what they called the infirmary beds but they were really no better than what you had in your so called room.

"Listen to me closely" any noise made your head hurt. Your ears even stopped working every now and then. But now her hand was on your cheek and you realized that you had no choice but to listen.

"I'm leaving."

"You're what?" Your voice was louder than intended. You instantly regretted it when your throat started to burn. You were happy for her, but could you really live without her? If this was even living at all. And was she truly leaving to go somewhere safe opposed to last time she was leaving.

"Relax. Sister Jude. She- she admitted to falsely putting me here. One of the nuns is letting me out" She spoke softly.

You now had tears in your eyes, you both did. "Lana i'm happy for you" your lip trembled. Though you were happy, you were still about to be separated from her. She would probably move on with her life and want to forget about Briarcliff as a whole. That meant forget about you too.

"Don't you cry now" she giggled and wiped away your tears. "I'll come back for you, I promise."

You felt her slowly take the iv out of your arm. You both knew that what they had on to 'make you feel better' was really something that probably shouldn't be going into you. But you didn't care anymore. You knew your end was near living in this place and especially without Lana being here to help you through this life.

"Lana" you said. Your voice was unsteady, sounding like you were walking on a tightrope thirty feet up.

She turned her attention back to you. "I love you" you said and started crying again. That could be the last time you say those words to her. "I love you too, angel. But this isn't the end, okay? I would never leave you here" Lana leaned in, capturing your lips in her own. She knew how you felt as if you were glass and she could see in all your feelings.

"Lana, I think i'm going to die. They're going to kill me" a singular tear ran down your face. You were afraid. Because after all, you've never been without Lana at this place.

"I need you to hold on just a little longer for me. I believe you can do it." She took your hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. You didn't respond because there wasn't anything else to say. But you would try your hardest to hold on. Try just so you could see Lana's face again. So you could feel her lips again.

"I have to go now. I'll be back, angel." She walked away and you suddenly felt so cold. As if her presence was the only thing protecting you and keeping you up right.

You watched as she walked and each step made your heart break. But you trusted her, at least you think you do.

"Wait" with a strained voice you shouted. Lana turned around and stared back at you blankly. As if she were looking for an answer or if she just hadn't heard you at all. She was worried that you stood up, you still weren't entirely okay after your treatment.