sarah paulson one shots

now i'm covered in you - abby gerhard

summary: abby's been spending an immense amount of time with carol lately and you fear that she may not love you anymore. one night, abby comes home and you can't help but break down.

warnings: none

word count: 1739

.   .   .

The house felt cold and empty. You always hated being alone. When you moved in with Abby, that hate only grew. Wherever she went, you went and vise versa. It had always been you and Abby...and Carol, of course.

It was never a problem, really. Carol was her close friend. You didn't worry about anything because you trusted Abby. If Abby had told you to walk into a burning building and that you wouldn't die, you would do it and you would believe her.

You could tell the love that Abby has for you just through her eyes and her lingering touches. Or maybe had for you.

It only started over a month ago. Carol is going through a divorce and everything with Rindy, it was hard on her. You get that. And you understand that Abby did too. Abby was her friend that she could tell absolutely anything to.

But you started to fell less loved a few weeks ago. A few hours at Carols house turned into all day and night. A call with her took up the time you actually had with Abby. Between you and Abby, kisses were missing and hugs weren't being shared.

You didn't get to show each other affection in public, so being alone in your house was the only time you could. That's why it was even worse when that time was taken away every. single. day.

You felt greedy. Greedy for all of Abby's love and attention. But she was your girlfriend and sometimes -a lot of the time,- you just need some time with her.

You wanted to trust Abby like you always did but it felt impossible when she was so cold with you. And everything was about Carol. What about y/n though?

You couldn't handle it anymore. Feeling like you don't have a girlfriend at all yet deep down, you know you do.

You were looking at yourself in the mirror when you noticed tears were starting to build up in your eyes. What does Carol have that you don't?

You threw your pajama shirt over your head and looked over to Abby's dresser. Her pajamas sat on the top of it. You always put them out for her. And then she always put them on after the shower that you both share. She would thank you with a kiss. But now they stay there. Hell, she was probably wearing Carols pajamas right now.

You slid under the covers. The bed was too cold, too big, too empty. Why have a bed for two when it was only being used by one now.

Time passed by but you couldn't manage to fall asleep. Your thoughts were running a mile a minutes and it kept you from being in peace. You couldn't fall asleep without knowing that Abby was safe. She hadn't even called you to tell her she would be staying late. She didn't have to because by now, you already knew.

You don't know how long you have been laying there. But a while had passed and you heard keys in the door. You knew who it was but you didn't have enough energy to get up for someone who couldn't reciprocate. As much as you wanted to run into her arms.

You listened as she did her usual routine. She hung her keys up, threw on her pajamas, brushed her teeth and slid into bed beside you. While the entire time, your back was face towards her so she couldn't tell that you were awake.

For the first time since she had been out late, she leaned down and placed a kiss on your temple. The feeling of her lips on your skin had made realize how awful it would be to lose her.