sarah paulson one shots

my summer sun - mildred ratched

requested by pollygrayswife: I was thinking if you can do a one shot that reader is Mildred's daughter and they start fighting and Mildred realizes that her daughter has like a fear of been separated of her mum

warnings: none

word count: 1051

.   .   .

Her job had been getting out of hand, working all hours of the day and night. Even then, her only free time was spent on dates with this woman she briefly mentioned. You were dragged all the way to California for what your mother said would be for a better life and more money.

You weren't too sure of that. You didn't know everything, but there were things that weren't adding up. You, however, still loved your mother. The  holding and reading you to sleep and the days you would spend with her on picnics.

You were all she had. And she, you. You were her best creation. Yet that seemed to alter when you moved. Now you attempted to fall asleep with the motel room eerily quiet. You hated staying here alone. It wasn't home. It wouldn't be without your mother.

You don't know how long it had been. Minutes felt like hours, tossing and turning in bed. But eventually, you heard keys jingling in the lock. You closed your eyes, hoping to pass yourself off as sleeping.

You allowed your mother to settle in before you finally spoke up, "It's about time."

She jumped slightly, so startled that you were proud of your fake-sleeping performance. She turned to you and frowned, tilting her head to the side. Nothing felt right to you.

"What are you still doing up?" She asked, sitting down at the edge of your bed. She looked down at you, eyes so warm and gentle that you had almost forgotten you were mad.

"It's hard to sleep in this scary place all alone." You pouted, crossed your arms over your body that was still laid down. You flipped to face the other side and that's when you saw the clock. "It's so late. Why are you always doing this?"

"Doing what?" Brown eyes squinted down at you. You didn't have to look at her to picture her expression. "I'm working for us. So we can get a house and have a nice life."

"We had a nice life. I was fine but then you decide to move us and now we live at this shit motel!" You're voice grew louder, echoing in the small, silent room. Mildred's face hardened, eyebrows furrowing.

"Watch your language and do not speak to me like that," Mildred said. "It may not seem nice now, but just give it some more time."

She went to stand back up but you began to speak again. "More time alone? While you work and I stay here. Alone."

Your mother gently tugs your body so your facing her again. It must've been the most contact you've had with her in a few weeks. She doesn't look angry. Just puzzled. "What is up with you? I told you I don't want you going anywhere if I'm gone. It's not safe."

"That's the thing! I don't care if I stay here. I just don't want to be alone," you said, veins practically popping out of your forehead. "At this point, you should just put me up for adoption. It's like you don't even want to be around me anymore."

Mildred froze for a moment. Images of her in the orphanage as a young girl flashed across her mind like a rolling movie. The older woman remembered the feeling of being unloved by her own mother. Feeling like a burden because she knew she wasn't wanted.

Mildred's face softened and she moved closer to you. She never truly learned how to be a mother, and so she just never acted the way her own mother did. You were Mildred's mini-me. Always by her side. Mildred had forgotten, over the years with you, what it was like to feel unloved.

"Don't you say that. Or think it. I would never. Ever. Put you up for adoption," Mildred spoke stern, however, not hard enough to scare you away. "You know I love you so much. I couldn't live without you by my side."

A single tear slid down your face. Your mother cupped your cheek and wiped it away with a swipe of her thumb. "Then why don't you show it anymore? Every since we moved I never get to hang out with you."

For the first time since you've moved, you let the tears prickle down you face in a rate too fast for Mildred to catch. For the first time, you let out that little girl who misses her mom.

"I—" For the first time, Mildred Ratched is speechless. She wasn't prepared for your deep emotions to peak through, or for you to even feel this way. "Sweetheart, why didn't you tell me you felt this way?"

"It's kind of hard when I never see you," you remark, rolling your eyes at the mere thought of it too.

"I didn't even realize y/n. I— I'm so sorry." Mildred scoots closer to you. "Come here," she says, voice softer than a summer night. She gently tugs you onto her lap. When your head makes its home on her chest, she can feel your tears soak through her blouse. She runs her fingers through your hair, untangling some knots. "You are my entire world, honey.

"Do you think I'm too clingy?" You sniffled, words muffled into auburn hair. Your mothers scent comforted you. Finally, you were home.

"There's no such thing as being 'too clingy.' You're my girl. I want to spend all my time with you, darling." She squeezed you tighter to let you know that she was here. "If I ever put my work before you again, I give you permission to slap me across the face."

"Mother!" You chuckled at her, looking up to see her smiling down at you.

"I'm serious. I don't want to make you ever feel like that again. I love you with everything in me, my summer sun." You smiled at the term, forever being her warm sun even when things get too dark and cold. She had always called you that.

"I love you too mom."