𝑺 𝑬 𝑹 𝑬 𝑵 𝑰 𝑻 𝒀 (18+)

Forty-two

                             S E R E N I T Y

                                          ♥

Noah was right. I hadn't given up anything. I had nothing to lose by being in a relationship with him. Except for maybe my sanity. Noah, on the other hand, had almost everything to lose. From Bullion to the riff in his relationship with his mother, the pressure from the board, the public. Noah was facing scrutiny from all ends but I didn't care about that. No, the only thing I seemed to be concerned with was defining a relationship that was doomed to fail.

I normally wasn't this pushy, I was almost embarrassed by my behavior over the past week. But with the France trip looming over my head I was forced to deal with the uncertainty of my love life sooner rather than later. I wished I knew what he was thinking. Wished I had access to the deepest parts of his brain to know what lurked behind that cool exterior.

I didn't just want in his head, I wanted a declaration. I needed to know if everything we'd been through thus far was worth it or if we were fighting for nothing. Why wouldn't you just talk to me, Noah? What was all of this for if it meant absolutely nothing in the end? I didn't need any more lessons but something deep within me told me he would be just that.

A lesson.

When I pulled up to Noah's house it was dark and his car was missing from the driveway. I waited around for an hour or so but he hadn't shown up. I figured he was taking some time to cool down and I wanted to give him his space. I owed him that much. I returned home and retreated to my bed hugging my phone. Maybe I should've texted him. Told him I was sorry and that I'd be willing to talk whenever he was ready.

Except it seemed like he'd never be ready.

Andrew and I were fine and back to normal but I couldn't say the same for Noah and me. We didn't speak unless he was thanking me for bringing him his coffee and I was saying you're welcome. I would brief him of his duties and hand him reports and still, he'd only ever said thank you. It was worse than the silent treatment. It brought me back to the early months of us working together. The time when my presence only agitated him and he was so closed off. It was fair to say he was still closed off but I'd learned so much about him over these few months. I didn't want that to be taken away from me.

The worst part of it all was I thought he'd be a part of my birthday. I went to dinner with my friends and family and opened extravagant gifts but I was still missing something. I was missing Noah. Andrew apologized for his friend's absence telling me he was just being moody. Andrew had been moody himself but still, he always showed up for me. Showed up with a present in hand a bottle of vodka in the other.

They were different, so different. That fact alone reminded me that we were different too but I would be fine. I had friends and I had family. The people who cheered me on while I blew out the candles on my birthday cake were no less exceptional than Noah Harrington. So, so what if that chapter of my life was over. I had people who loved me, people who supported me. I could survive without Noah. I could move on and go to France. I could get the life I always wanted.

"Don't get a big slice of cake because we still have to go out later!" Vanessa yelled while licking some icing from her finger. She wanted to spend the night of my birthday at some lounge but my mother had other plans.

"Uh, Vanessa darling?"

"Yes, Mrs. Taylor," Ness locked her arm around mine wanting to appear as a united front.

"Serenity is now twenty-five and you're not too far behind her. Don't you think you both are a little too old to be going to the club?" It was official. My mother had called me old. It wasn't long before I turned into her.