Our Coffee Confessions

OCC 10 : Stupid Subconscious

Christopher Paxton

"Okay brunette. You can go now. Zary is not around anymore." I told her. I handed her money for her obedience. She kissed my cheek and left.

I turn around to rest my back only to find out that Cades is watching. Her eyes looks like she's going to cry anytime soon.

I stood up but then my feet stopped me from walking to her. I saw small droplets of tears fall down her eyes and then she ran as fast as she could away from me.

I followed, of course. I don't know why. I know I did nothing wrong to her. She should know that. She knows that I am just doing this for Zary to notice me.

Or...

Impossible. Cades doesn't like me. She would not like me because I'm her bestfriend. She's not like that. She likes people like Kyle or Zach. I don't know why I'm thinking about her liking me. It's so impossible.

I followed her but halted when I saw her running to Zach. She drops on Zach's arm and folded her arms around him. Zach tighten his hug on Cades.

Suddenly, My heart started to feel heavy. It's like the water goes in and splurts out fast. Seeing her crying makes me guilty. I don't know what I did but I felt like it's my fault. She's my best friend and I hate seeing her like this. Maybe Kyle hurted her that's why she went to me. But then, feelings started to grow and I didn't have time to comfort her.

I'm a stupid friend. I let her be miserable while I'm here letting myself enjoy it. I hate being the jerk one. I don't like being a jerk. Cades is hurting.

I decided to just let Zach do the comforting. Cades needs to rest. Besides, All I do is hurt her. I never really helped. She was there for me while I'm here plotting for Zary to like me.

I went back to our room and tucked myself into bed.

---

My eyes squinted when I heard someone lay beside me. I turn around but didn't see the face of the person. Only the back of the person is seen. It's dark so I can't make out the person's back.
I moved my blanket to the person beside me and tucked the blanket. I found out that it's a girl. Maybe Cades decided to sleep. She is wearing a tank top and shorts.
I closed my eyes to sleep but then I felt her shiver. I touched her arm only to find out that she is raging hot. She's ill.

I don't know what I did but I suddenly covered her with my arms. Moments later, she started to calm down. She's still hot but I seem to lessen her colds.

I tightened my hug so she would stop shaking. I realized that her hair is wet. Did she take a bath or did she swim at night? Maybe that's why she is having colds.

She squirmed and faced me. I felt like I'm going to melt when she did that. She looked like an angel up close. Her cheeks are red maybe it's because of her colds and her nose as well. Her eyes have black shades under and her lips tremble.

I want to stop them from shaking, but how? It's not like I could kiss them. I'm not allowed to. She promised herself that she'll kiss someone she loves. And I know that is not me.

I respect her and I won't do that.

Instead, I jumped out of bed and grab a towel from my cabinet. I soaked it on fresh warm water and twisted it. I sat beside the sleeping Cades and damp the wet towel on her face.

I damp them slowly around her face and then I wiped the towel on her arm to stop her from shivering. After pampering her, I kept the towel together with the basin.

I stood up and went to the kitchen to make her some green tea. I don't know what it will help but it's better than nothing, right?

I head out of the kitchen counter and sat beside her. She opened her eyes and sat up. Cades folded her legs under her chest and stare at me. "What is that?" She asked.

I gave it to her and she took it without hesitation. "Drink it. You need it for your cold." I told her.

"I'm sorry for bothering you, Topher. I'm so stupid to soak myself underwater. I just need to vent out my feelings and I'm really stupid for choosing the water. I didn't know that it's nighttime."

I wanted to ask her why she wept when she saw me but I dropped the subject. I don't want her to be uncomfortable towards me.

"Thank you for the tea, Topher." She gave me back the tea cup. "I'm sorry again for waking you."
I head back to the counter and placed the tea cup recklessly. I don't know what to feel at the moment. I'm so stupid for letting her be with Zach. Zach doesn't know the meaning of not swimming at night. He doesn't even care about Cades!

What kind of person is he? Yeah, A jerk.

You're the jerk.

How am I the jerk? Zach was the one letting Cades die from colds.

You were the one who let Zach comfort her.

I have no choice. Cades decided to run to him. Cades' choice is to be with Zach.

But you know that you could've done better. You saw Kyle with Zary right? Of course she's hurt as well.

I know. I'm stupid. I'm a jerk. I let her be the one hurt.

I went back in the bedroom and saw that Cades is already in her sleeping form. I neared the lamp beside her and turned it off. I rounded the bed and lay down beside her. I can still feel her shiver slightly so I hugged her slowly.

I know this act could make me a better best friend.

I've done nothing for her and this is my way to repay her.

End of OCC 10