Dear Diary | Proxies

xxiv. shower steam kisses

Dear Diary,

Two showers a day keeps the bad thoughts away.

The warmth of the shower on my back was like heaven. Brian seemed to have set the water to the perfect temperature, warm enough that I felt like I could melt from happiness, but not hot enough to disturb my new open wounds like the still-needing-to-be-cleaned bite that Brian had given. The sight of it bleeding when I finally caught my reflection in the mirror made me take a step back before I realized what it was.

I was only in the water stream for a few moments, letting myself decompress, before I was brought out of my thoughts by a knock on the bathroom door. I sighed deeply, "Yeah?"

"C-can I c-come in?" Toby's voice was muffled by the door, and I giggled to myself. Really, I should have expected him to come running the second the shower turned on, but I was still trying to gather my composure after Brian's treatment.

"Yeah, it's unlocked," I replied, running shampoo through my hair as I heard the bathroom door click open. I had left it unlocked without thinking about it, a habit I had gotten used to because of Toby.

I could hear him shuffling around for a few moments, the sound of his clothes hitting the floor, and then he pulled the shower curtain open and stepped in, being careful to not slip and fall. Once he was finally inside, he turned his gaze to me. I was trying to wash the soap out of my hair, head tilted back, just listening to him, but I could feel his gaze running along my body, taking in all of the new marks I had been given.

Toby stepped forward before placing his hands on my waist, pulling me into him. I cracked my eye open, running my hand through my hair a final time before finally looking back to him. Awed eyes were still taking in my form. "D-does it h-hhh-hurt?"

I chuckled, leaning into his hold. "No, Tobes, it doesn't hurt."

One hand rose, and then, his fingers were dancing along a few of the marks on my neck before pausing at the bite. He dragged his thumb over it, mouth parted in awe. He was silent for a while, and I took the time to run my hand up and down his back, relishing in his hold.

"I missed you while I was gone," I mumbled over the shower stream. "I took a shower while I was at Jane's place, but it just made me feel worse 'cause all I could think about was you."

"I-I'm sorry," he whispered back, "b-but you're h-here, no-oo-ow, s-sss-so." He threw his head back, and his hands clenched on my skin. "R-right?"

I smiled. "Yeah, I'm here now. You've got me for a while." A little under 48 hours.

He grinned, pressing forward to kiss me deeply, completely ignoring the fact that he pushed us both into the stream of water, making it impossible to breathe. I complied for a few moments, though, pressing back just as deeply into him, but then I pushed us forward, taking a big gasp of air while giggling.

"S-sss-sorry," Toby spoke through giggles. "I go-ot a l-little ex-ssss-cited."

"It's okay, Toby. It's always okay."

He gave me a soft smile before pressing forward again, this time not as quick, just the lightest of touches, skin on skin, mouth on mouth. My hands on his back pressed him so he was flush against me. I wondered if I would be able to get us close enough that we would meld into one, inseparable and desperately in love.

He seemed just as excited as he pushed us so I was pressed against the shower wall, ducking down so he could press his mouth to my neck, down my collarbone, laving his tongue down my chest until he was able to wrap his lips around my nipple. He eagerly sucked it before knocking his hand forward, accidentally smacking my thigh incredibly hard. He quickly pulled away, eyes wide and face flushed with embarrassment. "I-I'm s-sss-sorry! I-it - th-they get wo-orse when I-I'm excited!"