Dear Diary | Proxies

vi. cut up feet

Dear Diary,
I had an episode for the first time in a while.

The next morning, I woke up in confusion as to what was weighing me down. I blearily opened my eyes to see that Toby had managed to change his position from last night, now having made it to where I couldn't move at all. He had hooked his legs with mine, one arm still wrapped around my waist while the other had moved to cradle the back of my head closer to his. His warm breath fanned across my shoulder as his lips were slightly pressed against it, just enough to feel the pressure. At some point in the night, the blanket had been thrown off us, pooling at our legs.

A smile slipped across my face before I realized, and I snuggled impossibly closer to the man, pressing a soft kiss to the top of his head. He let out a low groan and twisted a bit, beginning to wake up. "Good morning, Tobes," I mumbled, finally looking over to see the other two boys missing.

Toby grumbled lightly at my sentence and blinked open his eyes slowly, his brain slowly catching up. "Good- Good morning," he spoke, his voice raspy from sleep. He looked around slowly, still blinking the sleep away as he took in where he was. "R-right. You-your hous-sss-se."

"Forget where you were," I asked, running my hand through his hair again.

"Mmhmm." He let out a low breath against my neck before pressing a kiss to the skin. I hummed at the feeling and turned my head to look at him. He took the chance to lean forward and press a kiss to my lips. I made a noise of confusion before pressing into him as well, returning the kiss lazily. He smiled against my mouth and pulled away, his nose running along my cheek before he settled back to where he had been before.

My mind was reeling, tiredness making my mind foggy as I tried to recognize what I had just done. First Brian, and now Toby? A strange turn of events, indeed.

I was content to just sleep the morning in with Toby, but the other two had other ideas. I could hear clattering in my kitchen, and after a few moments, someone stepped into the room, leaning around the corner quietly, seemingly trying to see if we were still asleep. I turned at the sound, smiling at the sight of Tim who quickly hid his own smile.

"C'mon, you two, we made breakfast." His voice was quieter than usual as he spoke.

I continued my ministrations in Toby's hair but used my free hand to motion him to come closer. He gave me a confused look but stepped forward until he was right beside the recliner. I placed my hand on his jaw and pulled him closer, staring at his eyes. His face warmed up underneath my grasp, and he gave me a scowl.

"What are you doing."

I let go of his chin but pressed my thumb right on his cheekbone under his eye. "You slept," I mused, a smile quirking at my lips. "Your eyebags aren't as deep as usual."

He let out a scoff and rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Come on before it gets cold."

I giggled as he tried to hide his embarrassment at the affection, practically stomping out of the room. Toby moved at the sound and began to lift himself. I assumed he had heard most of the conversation. He paused as he untangled our legs, putting both of his on either side of mine, straddling my lap. He grinned down at me, finally mostly awake. I placed my hands on his knees and stared up at him. He looked so pretty sitting there, the sunlight from the windows lighting his face up just right, catching every dip and curve. His head snapped to the side a few times, and he rolled his shoulders. Then, he leaned forward and pressed another slow kiss to my lips, grinning against me, his teeth clacking slightly against mine as I grinned as well, his smile contagious.

He giggled as he pulled away and lifted himself from me fully, climbing off the couch and helping me off as well. He interlaced our fingers together and held the hand to his chest as we walked to the kitchen. Brian and Tim had gone through my fridge and made biscuits and gravy with eggs and bacon, a true southern breakfast.