My mom didn't give me more than a couple days to grieve Han's loss before she flew into Tokyo.
"My god, Audrey, you lived here? This town is more unsafe than Los Angeles," She complained as soon as she stepped inside the apartment. "I don't know how you felt safe here."
"Easy. There's seven locks on the door, and I was never really by myself for long periods of time," I muttered as I shut the door again, watching her look around the apartment. I didn't need to see her face to know that she had a look of disgust.
"Did he ever abuse you? Having that many locks on a door means that somebody is trying to keep somebody locked up," I couldn't believe the words that had just come out of her mouth.
Suddenly, I felt angry. Like really angry. Han never laid a hand on me that wasn't out of love. He never yelled at me, and hell, we rarely even fought. I can't remember the last time one of us was mad at each other.
"No," I said, still in disbelief at the question she asked me. "He installed those locks because he knew the area wasn't the safest place in Tokyo. He wanted me to feel safe when he wasn't here. I was allowed to come and go when I pleased. I didn't need permission to leave."
Without asking me, she walked down the small hallway and into the bedroom. It was still the way he had left it last — clothes on the floor and stuff scattered on the dresser. I couldn't bring myself to clean up. At least not yet.
"Mom! What are you doing?!" I yelled as she flung the closet door open and started ripping his clothes off the hangers. "Stop it!"
"Audrey, you're never going to be able to move on if you keep this shit here," She said, ignoring my pleas as she continued to take stuff out of our closet. "I'm going to get rid of these things."
As she moved out of the room to gather trash bags to put stuff in, I quickly moved to take the clothes she had left on the hangers to hide them. I didn't want to get rid of everything he had.
It took some convincing, but my mom agreed not to throw out his stuff. She did, however, insist on moving it to a storage unit. I didn't want to, but I agreed just to get her off my back. I wanted her out of our apartment and I didn't want her to step foot in it ever again. She never asked me how I was doing or feeling. I knew she didn't care for Han, Dom and any of the others, but I wished she would at least act like I was her daughter.
Xoxox
"Your mom hasn't come to see you or Lucas yet?" Dom quizzed as he finally let Mia get some time with Lucas after holding him for an hour. "Has she even asked how you were doing?"
"She checked up on me a few times a month when I was pregnant...and made a couple empty promises to come see me, but no, she hasn't been out yet," I muttered. I guess Han noticed the change in my tone because he reached over and slipped his arm around my waist, pulling me a little closer to him.
"I always hated how your mom talked to you," Dom said, to which I bit down on the inside of my lip. "I can take how she talked to me. She doesn't phase me. But whenever she filled you with false hope that things would get better for your family, that's what really made me angry."
"I'd have to agree there," Han said as I glanced up at him while he played with my fingers. "She did it at least once a week when Audrey was pregnant with Lucas. She'd tell her that she was going to send stuff for them or that her and her father were going to come and visit, but she never did. It broke my heart seeing her cry over it all the time."
As much as I didn't like them talking about my mom, because at the end of the day she was still my mom, I did have to agree with them. She was right. I struggled to get along with my parents anyway, but after I started hanging out with Dom and people who actually cared and treated me like family, that's when problems started to arise. And when I dropped out of medical school, that's when shit hit the fan.
"My mom really did show me that even your biological family members can be pieces of shit," I said as my voice cracked. I took a second to compose myself because I didn't want to cry in front of them, and I sure as hell did not want Lucas to see me cry. "But that's okay, because I have you guys. I'll always have you guys."
"Sometimes I think it's my fault that she treats you this way," Dom said as I frowned. "But then I'd listen to your stories about her and know that I made the right decision by treating you as my daughter."
"I'd like to think I turned out okay," I said as we all laughed, and a wave of relief crashed over me when the mood lightened a bit. "And I like to think that Lucas is going to turn out alright, too. He's got me, Han, and all of you. He's got the best family there is."
Lucas made a sigh of content when Mia leaned back on the couch with him on her chest and rubbed his back. It made me smile, and just for a second, forget about my mom and all the bullshit she had caused me.
Han suggested that we order food in and watch a movie. We even invited Dom, Mia and Lety to stay over at the house since they were going to be in town for a few days and we finally got the guest bedrooms all ready. They happily agreed, and I couldn't help but grin at the warm feeling that was building inside me.
I might not have had a happy family growing up when I needed them the most, but the healing began when I met Dom. I felt whole again when I met Han. And finally, I broke the cycle of toxic parenting when we had Lucas.
I wasn't going to let Lucas down the way my mom let me down. I wasn't going to fill him up with empty promises and leave him wondering if I was ever going to be the mom that he needed me to be.
Dom had interrupted my thoughts after dinner and asked if we could go talk. I made sure Han was alright with Lucas and gave him a kiss before we went outside to the garage, sitting down in the chairs.
"Kid, you're gonna be a great mother," Dom said after popping the top on his Corona. "I'm proud of you."
"I haven't really done much to be proud of. I dropped out of medical school and moved across the world overnight. My parents hate me," I said as we both laughed while I crossed my legs. "Why are you proud of me?"
"Because you put yourself first and did what you needed to do to keep yourself going. Medical school might not've worked out for you, but do you know what did?"
When he paused to look over at me, I pursed my lips and shook my head. We haven't had a talk like this in quite some time, so I was interested in what he had to say."
"You found people that care about you and built a life that you wanted. There might've been some bumps along the way, but you did. And that's something to be proud of every day, kid."
I smiled and stood up to hug him, wiping my eyes when I pulled away from him. He was like the father I never had.
"Thanks for never turning your back on me when things got hard," I sniffled, looking up at him.
"You don't turn your back on family."
YOU ARE READING
*** COMPLETED *** Until the World Explodes (Han Seoul-Oh)
FanfictionSTARTED: June 28, 2021 COMPLETED: January 28, 2022 After accidentally running into him at one of Dominic Toretto's family dinners a few years ago, Audrey Sinclair has been attached to Han at the hip, where they dated long-distance for awhile before...