The Sh#% Your Parents Should Tell You

Did I Make the Right Decision?

Did I make the right decision?

You're going to ask this question a lot. You've probably already asked that question a lot. Did I choose the right college to go to? Did I choose the right field to major in? Should I have broken up with my significant other? Should I have spent half my college fund on tickets to see my favorite K-pop group live? (Yes. The answer is yes.)

As you've probably already begun to notice, you rarely have a completely unwavering answer to "Did I make the right decision?" No matter which choice you make, a voice will likely squawk in the back of your brain, turning your thoughts into a cacophony of doubts. Maybe I should've done this. Maybe I should've done that. Would I have been happier, would I have achieved more, would it have been easier if...?

The reason why our brains won't leave us alone when we make decisions is because we humans like certainty and predictability. We like to believe we're in control of our destinies.

Consequently, we (and by we, I mean mostly the Western, industrialized world) peddle the belief that there is A path to success. A path to our dreams. A path to whatever it is we want to do. And all we have to do is find and follow that path, and voilà! Certain success!

Oh, were it that easy. Unfortunately, there is no one right way to get where you want to go. There are no set steps or proven guidelines to follow that will guarantee a particular end. Not only are there many, many paths to where you want to go, every path is cluttered with wanted and unwanted outcomes, is rife with smooth and rough patches. This includes the path you've meticulously laid out and diligently pursued. It even includes the path everyone swears is THE right one.

Fortunately, there's a definite upside to this "there's no single proven path" situation: it means there's potential in everything you do. Every path offers something that can lead you forward. Even if fate steers you down some smelly back alley that seems to dead end in despair, that path will present opportunities you never before imagined. You just have to look for them, be open to them, and explore what they have to offer.

In other words, make a decision. Then make it right.

Easier said than done, you say? You are correct. But, making your decisions right involves no more effort or risk than chasing an elusive and ultimately unknowable "right" decision. In either case, you make choices and take actions, then deal with the consequences, most of which you can't control or predict; this is the unavoidable stuff of life. However, making your decisions right means making your attitude and approach more flexible, more adaptable to the shifting currents of fate. And while that won't necessarily assure you reach the circumstance of your dreams, it'll make the journey a lot more manageable – maybe even a lot more enjoyable.

"Did I make the right decision?" You may never get your mind to stop asking that question. But you can give it a definitive answer.

"It will be."