Smile (Complete)

The evening which was walking all by itself

"Where are we going?"

"Where do you want to go?"

"Tharn has no intentions of portraying a passionately in love young man, but he firmly decided that the evening alone with remorse, he just cannot stand it. The scheme is standard: cinema, cafe, walk in the sunset. Tharn realizes with belated annoyance that the latter was in vain: in his head there constantly sounds "because the sky always has different colors."

"What?" a ringing girlish laugh is heard.

"What?"

"Mm... about the sky and colors. Did you remember Type's words?" Naya is still chuckling softly.

That's it.

I've blurted it out loud. Idiot.

The problem is not only in these unintentionally dropped words. Tharn has been noticing for days that he looks at many things around him through the eyes of Type and thinks about them with the thoughts of this silly.

So… It's time to end this.

"Come here" Tharn pulls the girl to him by the waist, feigns desire, and Naya's palms are on his shoulders.

"How weird you are," the girl coquettishly leads with her gaze, "once you are as cold as ice... then... ahem ... "come here". Maybe you can already decide what I am for you?"

Tharn masks the ignore with a kiss on the neck. Hands slide over a slender, flexible body. Naya gasps, bites her lip, substitutes the cheekbone line for a kiss. Tharn closes his eyes... and on the underside of his eyelids there is a stupid smile of Type and his very sad eyes.

Why so?!

Obviously, Tharn manages to linger, embarrassed by the memories of two days ago. And they are not limited by the smile with Type's tearful eyes. Tharn can't help but ask himself: how is he... this silly one? Sitting somewhere on the shore and admiring the sunset? Or does he embody some of his new fantasy on canvas? Or... is someone offending him... maybe at this very moment some San or someone worse is lasciviously tormenting his weak little body?

Tharn doesn't want to think about him at all. But it's stronger than him. To some extent, Tharn understands that this is just a voice of conscience. Under the mask of external indifference, it has not gone anywhere.

"Tharn? Are you here?" Naya clicks her thin fingers with a neat manicure in front of his eyes. "What's going on?"

"Naya," Tharn makes an attempt to kiss the girl on the lips, but Naya managed to catch on to Kirigun's strange behavior.

"No, wait. What are you thinking about, tell me? You're not mentally with me, right?"

"Yes, about nothing," Tharn again clings with a kiss, but again runs into a refusal.

"Answer honestly. Did you date someone at your old school? You... you broke up because of your move, but you still miss her. Right?"

It was a shitty idea.

"No. That's all? Any more questions, or shall we continue?"

Tharn is not used to intimate communication with girls at all. In fact, he hasn't even tried dating any of them. Just a couple of bad dates. He never thought about the romantic component of his life at all. Kissing was always the maximum intimacy he allowed himself with them. The problem is that he didn't feel any aftertaste. He didn't want to continue. In exactly the same way as now, there was one thing in hishead as a result: why am I here?. At some point, Tharn began to wonder: maybe he was not "about girls" at all? It's a shame to remember, but he even Googled tests like "How gay are you?". He remembers how, after a series of stupid questions, he sat with a facepalm for a result of twenty-seven percent. Then everything somehow resolved itself: Tharn just stopped bothering. Immersed in his studies. He learned about the program for international students in the US. The intention was: another country, other people, something must change, break this vicious circle of boredom and aimlessness of every lived day. But Tharn forgot that we carry the suitcase of our thoughts and fears everywhere with us.

"Anyway, I'm off. I'm not going to be a temporary replacement for someone—" Naya angrily pushes Tharn and, without saying goodbye, walks away

Why is everything like that, huh?! Why can't everything just be normal?!

"Hey, Tharn!"

Mm. You are here, of course. It was just not enough to complete the picture of the evening of an absolute crap.

"Um... Techno. What are you doing here?"

"Hah, you still remember my name!" the guy is stupidly happy. "Shall we go to my place? We have a drink and a bunch of snacks there, huh?"

"To your place?" Tharn frowns. "Mm... is Sun there too?"

"No, he's not here," Techno smiles, waves invitingly, "let's go already! Why are you hanging around here alone, huh?"

"Well... Okay."

It definitely won't get any worse today.

The apartment of their mutual classmate. Parents are not at home, and the guy threw a little party. They come in just at the moment when the whole company of six people are staring at the laptop screen, from the speakers of which the sounds of porn are coming. Tharn rolls his eyes with a sigh.

"Don't like this?" immediately starts a hurdy-gurdy No, "If you like, we'll find gay porn, we can turn it on for you. Those two guys over there, in green and black T-shirts, are bi, so it's okay."

"Thank you. No need."

Tharn already wants to get out. But he doubts that it will be easier at home.

Fortunately, the video ends, the guys are laughing, vying to share their impressions with each other. Then, one by one, drinks are poured, not a special lover of getting drunk, Tharn seems to break loose. After a while, he can barely stand on his feet. He still has the sense to stop.

"I'll go, thanks for calling," he nods to the cheering Techno.

"At least call a taxi, huh?"

"No," Tharn staggers, waving it away. -"I need to clear my head."

"Well, as you like, dude!"

It's getting dark outside. It's good that he dialed Mom while he was still able to produce a clear speech. Probably, he decided to mow across the coastline in vain. His feet are sinking in the sand, he's about to fall on it. Before my eyes, there are some pictures layered on top of each other. It seems that someone's familiar face flashes.

And a sonorous excited voice:

"Are you feeling bad? Shall I help you get home?"

Type... How did you get here...

"I am bad, Type... Very bad," Tharn manages to honestly confess before completely passing out.

The forehead and temples are pressed as if they are clamped in an iron vise. Tharn struggles to open his eyes.

Um... what?

He's lying in a completely unfamiliar room. While still unfocused, he notices a lot of bright stuff on the walls. The glance falls on the blanket... ahem... Bed linen with pandas?

What's going on anyway? Have I gone back ten years?

A whisper with a touch of mystery is heard above the ear:

"Just don't be scared. This is not a kidnapping. And you're not being held hostage."

Recognizing this voice, Tharn raises his head with one thought: it would be better to be held hostage...