Secret Love Song - Ben Chilwell

One Hundred.

December 26th 2020

"You look breathtaking" Mia stated, as Ashley smiled at her, smoothing out the white dress. "I don't feel it" Ashley muttered, as she then began to play with her hair.

"His not coming is he?" Ashley questioned, as Amber shook her head softly. "I think it's a hard choice, but I can understand why he isn't coming" Amber states, as Ashley nodded her head. "I get that" Ashley stated. "I just wish things were different you know" Ashley stated, as she tried her hardest to blink away the tears that threatened to fall.

This should be the happiest day of her life, it should be magical, it should be loving, but all she could feel was the turning motion in her stomach, wanting nothing more than to walk out of the door and never look back.

"Do you think I'm doing the right thing?" Ashley whispered, as she turned to look at two people she trusted with her life. "It doesn't matter what we think babe, this is your life" Amber stated, as Mia shook her head, she was never one to keep quiet, her opinions being spoken, and this time was no different.

"I think you're making a mistake" Mia stated, as she looked out of the window. "I think, there's no happy ending with this, you just have to chose what you think is right, and I think that even if you think marrying him is right, I can tell you that it isn't" Mia stated, as Ashley looked at her, a raised eyebrow indicating for her to carry on.

"I think you can't marry him when your heart is with Ben, forget about the contract, if you wasn't signed to marry him, would you? Or would you be on your way to Cobham?" Mia questioned, as Ashley looked down at her feet. "If there was no contract I'd be with Ben" Ashley stated, as she heard the door close behind her.

"You've got five minutes" Mia smiled, as she walked to the door with Amber, as Ashley looked over to see Ben, and it was clear as day he had no plans to attend, dressed in his chelsea shorts and top, his hair slightly messy, but his face spoke a thousand words.

"Please don't marry him Ash" Ben whispered, as Ashley sighed to herself. "You know I have no choice in this" Ashley stated. "You have a choice" Ben stated, his voice soft as he moved forward to her, taking her hands in his. "You can chose your happiness Ashy" Ben stated, as he moved a stand of her hair behind her ear, looking at how beautiful she looked.

She didn't need loads of make up, or her hair straight, it was fine curly, it was fine all messy, to him she looked beautiful in anything, and it only confirmed his feelings for the younger girl as she stood there, in a wedding dress, on her wedding morning, marrying someone else.

"Will you please at least just come? I don't want this to be the end of our friendship" Ashley stated, as Ben took that as her answer, that she was really choosing him over everything. "I'll wait around" Ben smiled. "I'd like a dance at the end of it all" Ben forced a smile as he spoke, as Mia and Amber knocked on the door softly. "It's time" Amber spoke, as Ashley nodded her head.

~~~~

Ashley knew that she should of been listening to what the vicar was saying, knowing that this was all important to the rest of her life, but her eyes adverting to Mason, Declan, Jack and Ben who were in the second row, Mason had offered his blazer jacket to Ben so that he didn't stick out like sore thumb, but it meant everything that he had decided to stick around and watch this, no matter how much it broke either of their hearts.

"So Jordan, your vows when you are ready" The vicar stated, as Jordan cleared his throat, looking into Ashley's eyes as she finally turned her gaze back to him.

"Ashley, god, it feels like this day has been a long time waiting for both of us, but I can't wait to see where our journey heads into the future. I feel like with you I didn't only find the love of my life, I found my best friend, someone who looks after me when I'm not well, someone who laughs at me when I'm not on my best form, and someone who can be harsh when they need to be" Jordan smiled, as a few members of the crowd laughed. "I'm forever thankful that I get to share the rest of my life with you" Jordan finished, as Ashley gave him her best fake smile, which seemed to work as he beamed one back at her.

"So, before we move any further, is there any reason why these two should not be lawfully married? Speak now or forever hold your peace" The vicar stated loudly.

And it took everything Ashley had inside of her to not open her mouth, instead choosing to bite her lip, holding in any breath she had, whilst Jordan gripped her hand tightly, Ashley wanting the ground to eat her up.

"They can't get married" a voice called, from near the back of the room, as some gasps overtook the room, both Ashley and Jordan turning to look at the voice, as they ran a hand through their hair.

"Stacey?" Ashley questioned, as Jordan sighed to himself, as Ashley turned to look at her own friends, watching as Ben stood up, Mason turning to look at him with wide eyes, as Ben moved to stand with Amber and Mia, both of them smiling at him.

"She can't marry him" Ben stated, as the attention turned to Ben, Ashley looking down at her feet. If there was anytime that she. Wished she was somewhere else, now was that time.

"They're right" Ashley stated, as she looked at Jordan with a sympathetic expression, as she let go of his hands.

"I can't go through with this" Ashley stated. "It's been a long time coming, and we both know that" Ashley continued as Jordan shook his head. "You love Stacey" Ashley smiled. "And that's fine" Ashley paused briefly. "We both know we don't love each other Jord, and is a piece of paper really worth that?" Ashley finished.

"For some time, me and Jordan have been under our own oath, that we would marry, no matter what happened" Ashley stated, as she turned to look at the crowd of people, some looking shocked, some looking mortified, the rest of them looking confused.

"And we was young and somewhat stupid when we signed a contract, but you know what I'm choosing myself, I'm choosing my own happiness" Ashley smiled, as she looked over at Ben briefly who was smiling at her.
"I signed a contract to state that I would marry Jordan, or leave a band I have worked my backside off for, and as much as I love what I do, no man or contract is worth not being happy" Ashley finished.

"So if you'll excuse me, I believe I get one last concert, and I'm intending on working my ass off to make it the best it'll ever be" Ashley smiled, as she took off the heels at the altar. "They really hurt my feet" Ashley chuckled. "By all means, I hope you two can be very happy together" Ashley smiled, as she looked between Stacey and Jordan. "And all of you guys, please use the party afterwards, share it with each other, have fun and let lose, its not everyday you get to be happy" Ashley stated. "God I'm rambling" Ashley chuckled. "Right, I need to go" Ashley smiled.

And the room stood and watched her chose her happiness over anything, finally making the choice that felt right to her, even if it meant she wouldn't be in a band anymore, as much as it made her happy, her friends made her happier, and deep down she knew the truth.

Ben made her the happiest.