The Debt of Guilt [BxB]

51: after

June
1995

Peter stood in the middle of his bare motel room; clothes were no longer strewn across the floor, and all the neglected takeaway boxes had been thrown away. He tightened his grip around the handle of his suitcase, sparing the room one last glance before turning to leave for the very last time. But he stopped when he noticed the corner of a familiar folder poking out from beneath the bed. Jenifer's letters.

He picked it up and perched on the end of the bed, plucking out the last photo; one of Jenifer and Hannah decorating a ginger bread house, cheeks glowing and smiles wide. He turned it over and read the short note on the back.

Christmas 1994

Danny,

I haven't heard from you in so long now and I'm starting to worry. I've seen all your movies, and I see your face on the cover of hundreds of gossip magazines, so I know you're okay. I just don't know if you're really okay - do you understand what I'm saying? Anyway, I miss you. Please write back.

Thank you for Hannah's present - she loves the bike.

- Jen

Peter sighed, slipping the photograph back into the folder. He understood why Danny had stopped writing to Jenifer over the years; it was too painful. But Peter still resented him for it; he would have loved the opportunity to talk to his best friend again. To hear about Hannah's childhood and their new life in Wales. And Danny had taken it all for granted, just like he had everything else.

Peter tucked the folder under his arm, switched off the light, and exited his motel room, suitcase dragging behind him.

When his taxi pulled up outside the gates of Danny's mansion, he almost didn't get out. Almost told the taxi driver to take him straight to the airport. But Peter knew that he had to do this. This was his last stop. The last piece of LA he needed to rid himself of. The last piece of himself he needed to rid himself of.

Peter found Danny outside, half asleep on a sun lounger, a pair of designer sunglasses resting on the bridge of his nose. Peter didn't approach him straight away; just watched from a few metres away, taking it all in, trying to preserve the image in his mind. Because soon enough, he wouldn't get these moments anymore. These moments to watch and admire and soak Danny up, in all his youthful beauty.

Danny finally noticed him, sitting up, pushing his sunglasses into his hair, "Hey, you're back." He smiled.

"Yeah." Peter didn't step towards him, but tossed the folder full of Jenifer's photographs onto the sun lounger next to Danny. "Sorry I didn't come back last night. I slept at the motel."

"You're here now." Danny said hesitantly, eyes flicking towards the folder.

Peter's expression softened, "Not for much longer."

Danny frowned, getting up and walking towards him. His gaze drifted to the suitcase Peter had abandoned in the foyer, and panic took ahold of him, "You're leaving?" He tried to keep the fear out of his voice but it was too much.

Peter merely nodded, "I'm leaving."

"No." Danny choked out, "No, you can't. Please. Peter, you-you can't leave."